One Week at the Mall of America

By Alex in Christmas, Travel on Dec 4, 2007 at 3:42 am

Think that your Black Friday holiday shopping experience was bad? How about living in a mall for one full week?

For this article, reporter Matt Snyders of City Pages spent one whole week at the Twin Cities’ megamall Mall of America and lived to tell the tale:

… how to go about wrapping your head around a monolith that employs more than 11,000 workers, including clerks, security guards, tour guides, and ride operators? That spans 4.2 million square feet? That rakes in almost $2 billion a year from visitors? That, according to an awesomely arbitrary stat rundown on its website, can fit seven Yankee Stadiums into it?

One way is to eat, breathe, drink, and sleep in the place for seven days, inhabiting it during all open hours, 10:00 a.m. to 9:30 p.m. Which is exactly what I did. I realized going in that boredom would be my greatest adversary. These misgivings were compounded by the guidelines I was determined to follow:

* I was not to leave the building for any amount of time during open hours.
* I was to at least step foot in every one of the mall’s 520-plus stores.
* I was required to sleep a minimum of one night in the mall. Somehow.
* No outside food, water, or alcohol. Everything consumed must be purchased onsite.
* No iPod or other distractions allowed.
* No poking fun at the mall’s Santa Clauses.
* Not even the one that kind of looks like a pedophile.

LinkThanks Jeff Shaw!


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  1. k
    Dec 4th, 2007 at 7:45 am

    Sounds like hell..o_o

  2. MonkeyMan
    Dec 4th, 2007 at 10:54 am

    A week anywhere in America would be hell.

  3. Dave
    Dec 4th, 2007 at 7:16 pm

    Not poking fun at the Santa’s would be toughest. Wonder if you could provoke one to violence? Imagine the shattered childhood memories left in the wake of that episode!

    A week anywhere in America would be hell.

    Says the monkey who’s never been here.

  4. The Slapster
    Dec 4th, 2007 at 9:57 pm

    And yet MonkeyBoy, in the true cowardly spirit of posting anonymously, fails to mention his own country of origin. How predictable.

    Malls in general = evil and nasty. Kudos to this guy for surviving.

  5. Chad
    Dec 5th, 2007 at 1:05 am

    kinda reminds me of that movie with tom hanks where he gets stuck on the airport terminal for years.


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