Generator Land has this Homespun Analogy Generator, which will spit out funny analogies as funny as Dave Chappelle before he went nuts.
Here are some from the hall of fame:
I'm as gassy as a sick seal in a bowl of soup.
He's as grumpy as a holy badger at a pie eatin' contest.
She's as undecided as an oriental sloth with an itch.
I'm as truthful as an overweight antelope having a sneezing fit.
Link - Thanks Mike Raia!
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These are all as stupid as, well, you!
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It's as dumb as many other un-neat posts!
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I just heard a new one, "Tough as woodpecker lips".
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That's as F'd up as a football bat!
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Fred Thompson is as wily as a drunken weasel in a hay baler.
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