Zeon Santos's Blog Posts

Frank Zappa's Anti-Drug PSAs Warn Kids About Being Like "Suzy Speedfreak"

Many people think Frank Zappa did all kinds of drugs during his lifetime, thinking he took drugs like lsd, pot and cocaine while creating the masterfully freaky music that would become his legacy.

But Frank was actually anti-drug, and neither took drugs nor allowed drug users in his bands, which is why these anti-drug PSAs were a labor of love rather than a court ordered punishment.

(YouTube Link)

Is your mind blown yet? Then check out this interview with Frank Zappa where the father of the "roughest and farthest out group on the scene today, the Mothers Of Invention" talks about why he hates drugs.

(YouTube Link)

-Via Dangerous Minds

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How To Be The Worst Person At A Convention

With San Diego Comic-Con 2016 coming up soon it's time to brush up on our convention etiquette so we don't go into the show and tick people off any more than necessary.

Or maybe you're thinking about getting revenge for all those cosplay accessories that have poked you in the eye, all the ginormous backpacks that have punched you in the face, or the body stench that assaulted your senses.

Looking to be the worst person at your favorite fandom convention? Follow these comic strip style instructions by Julia Lepetit and ruin the show for your fellow fans!

-Via Geeks Are Sexy

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Girl Shares Pics Of Street Food From Around The World On Her Instagram Account

Rose Gelato, Paris

If you're gonna go around taking pictures of everything you eat so you can post the pics to social media sites you should take a note from Melissa Hie and use those pics as an excuse to travel around the world.

Hello Kitty Donut, Tokyo

Melissa posts pics of the delicious street food she discovers during her travels on her Girl Eat World Instragram account, where you can see everything from the amazing looking Hello Kitty donut from Japan to this plain but delicious puff she purchased in Myanmar.

Puff, Myanmar

As you can tell the food isn't the only reason people are oohing and aahing over Melissa's pics, and her drop dead delicious images should serve as an example of how to do social media food pics the right way.

Frozen Yogurt, Malta

See "Girl Eat World" Instagram Features The Tastiest Street Food From Around The World here

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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GPS Trackers Show How Far Pet Cats Actually Travel While Outside

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Cat owners who let their furry family members go outside know cats like to roam about and survey their section of the kingdom, patrolling the area so their humans aren't suddenly invaded by an army of mice.

But the distance they travel remains a bit of a mystery, since we usually can't see every bit of where our cats go while they're outside.

People have tried attaching cameras to their collars to see where they go, but this doesn't give us a very good idea of the total distance traveled.

So Australia's Central Tablelands Local Land Service came up with the brilliant idea to log how far a cat actually travels using a GPS tracker, so cat owners can see how much their cat actually gets around.

Cats are considered an invasive species in Australia, and yet owners claim their cats always stay close to home, so the Land Service hopes these GPS maps will open their eyes to just how much their cats get around.

See more from GPS Trackers That Show Cats' Activity During The Night here

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Insider Secrets About Dollar Stores Shared By A Store Manager

Dollar stores crept up slowly alongside grocery and department stores and started stealing all their business away a buck at a time, changing our mind about what goods should cost.

Those other often overpriced stores didn't pay the dollar stores any mind until they realized they'd have to price match on certain items, and we've been paying less for the stuff we need ever since.

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But what's the best deal at the dollar store?

According to Brandon, manager of a Dollar General store, greeting cards and laundry products are the best deal, and laundry soap is also one of the most shoplifted items in his store.

Brandon says managers get paid pretty well to work at Dollar General (about 34-40k to start), but if they ever lose their keys they are fired on the spot. Harsh!

Read 8 Insider Secrets You Didn't Know About Dollar Stores, Revealed By A Manager here

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Instagram's Rich Russian Kids Take Decadence To A Whole New Level Of Dumb

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There are two things you can almost always say for sure about Russia's rich kids- they're self-centered and they like to brag about their super wealthy way of life.

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And even though we don't expect more from rich kids they still somehow manage to amaze us with how rich they really are, we're talking park your luxury car so you can let your pet racoon out to go potty rich.

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They also love to rub our noses in the fact that their dogs live better than many people, and have the expensive drinking habit to go with their decadent doggy lifestyle.

(Instagram Link)

Do they have doggie rehab centers in Russia? 'Cause if they don't they should probably start building them now...

See This Instagram Account Documents The Insanely Opulent Lives Of Russia's Richest Kids here

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Stephen Colbert And Steve Carell Discuss Drinking Responsibly

TV shows like to teach us about responsibility, and adult TV shows like The Daily Show teach us about adult stuff like drinking responsibly during Spring Break.

Stephen Colbert and Steve Carell are both responsible fellows, so they were selected as the spokesmen for moderation in this 2001 clip from The Daily Show.

(YouTube Link)

Colbert and Carell are both saucy fellows even when they're not hitting the sauce, but after about eight cocktails it was hard for Carell to contain his sauciness, let alone serve as the spokesman for responsible drinking. He looks like he'd be a really fun drinking buddy though!

-Via Laughing Squid

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Guy Fieri Eats The Pain Away To Johnny Cash's "Hurt"

Everybody deals with their problems in a different way, and even though we've all been warned against using a crutch to help us cope there are certain vices in life that can become part of who we are.

Stoners keep it stoney, drinkers pound shots to dull the pain, and foodies like Guy Fieri stuff their sad little goateed faces, sometimes while listening to Johnny Cash's somehow even sadder rendition of "Hurt". (Barely NSFW due to language)

(YouTube Link)

So Guy is swallowing all of his pain, choking it down like a chili dog of discontentment...explains a lot about his look, actually.

-Via Memebase

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What We Wish We Could Say During An Argument

For some reason the argumentative people in the world love to ask us what we think of certain things, like movies, TV shows or music, then berate us about our lack of taste when we don't agree with them.

Oh yeah, that's because they like to argue about really stupid stuff, like movies and TV shows...

Haters are gonna keep on hatin', but now thanks to this comic by Julia Lepetit from Dorkly you can flip the script when they start in on you for *gasp* actually having your own opinion about pop culture!

-Via Dorkly

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Artist Creates Killer Zombie Stationery For Horror Movie Fans

If you know any horror movie fanatics, or you are one yourself, then you know that die-hard horror fans like to surround themselves with scary stuff, to make them feel more comfortable in polite society.

But horror heads who work in an office are forced to hide their morbid interests while at work, so as not to scare the suits, and therefore must find sly and creative ways to frighten the place up.

So creative director Jacques Pense created a subtle yet utterly horrifying way to bring horror to the offices of 13th Street Television- bloody zombie stationery.

This clever stationery set features zombie details placed in the perfect position to be stabbed through the face by a 3-ring binder, stapled in the eyes, or simply torn apart when you open a letter.

-Via design you trust

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Playboy Mansion Sold To The Owner Of Twinkies

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It appears snack food fueled bods are the new standard for sexiness in the 21st century, as the swanky old smokin', drinkin' and carousin' set gives way to those who feed our appetites for sugary sweets.

What does all this really mean?

It means Playboy Enterprises, the standard for old school swank, can no longer afford the symbol of their empire, the Playboy Mansion, so Hugh Hefner is selling it to the co-owner of Hostess Brands Daren Metropoulos.

The sale is predicted to set records for most expensive Los Angeles residential sale ever, as it's expected to cost close to $200 million, but the sale comes with one stipulation- 90-year-old Hugh Hefner gets to live in the mansion for the rest of his life.

-Via USA Today

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The Real Reason Why Some Dogs Sniff Butts At The Dog Park

Not all dogs dream of working in law enforcement, but those who do often catch their criminally unambitious brethren completely by surprise, which is why dealers use drug mules instead of drug dogs.

Drug dogs are those good dogs who use their super keen smellers to sniff out crime, and as this comic from Deathbulge shows they can smell a sack of sticky icky a mile away...even if it's keistered.

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Man's Infinity Gauntlet Oven Mitt Is Melted By Pizza Rolls, Internet Only Cares About Pizza Rolls

One of the unfortunate side effects of geek mania is the never-ending stream of crappy licensed products that flow through the stores like pop culture sewage.

This cheaply made crud often passes the in-store visual test only to fall apart when you get it home, literally making it an overpriced piece of trash.

One poor fella named Nick Borelli was left feeling burned when he discovered the awesome looking Infinity Gauntlet oven mitt he bought from Loot Crate melted while pulling a tray of pizza rolls out of the oven.

No wonder Thanos wants to destroy the Earth!

Nick took to Twitter to warn those who possess the Infinity Gauntlet oven mitt against using it for its intended purpose, but as expected the interwebs was more concerned about Nick's pizza rolls than his hands.

-Via FAILBlog

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Reporter Screams While Going Down Slide

Everyone feels a different level of joy while slipping down a slide, typically ranging from blah to bliss, but some people outrightly hate slides, possibly because they got stuck in one when they were kids.

Judging by the reporter's reaction as she slides down in this video she has either never been on a slide in her life and is totally terrified or she's having the time of her life and expresses joy by screaming bloody murder.

(YouTube Link)

Maybe she sees something at the bottom of the slide we can't see?

-Via Know Your Meme

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Kid Destroys LEGO Sculpture An Hour After Exhibit Opens

Kids can be mighty crafty, which is why you should always keep an eye on your offspring when visiting a place full of breakable and/or valuable stuff, or else you might get stuck paying the bill.

But sometimes kids don't understand why destroying something, such as a LEGO sculpture, is wrong, because they just see that giant statue made of building blocks as a deconstruction challenge.

It took LEGO artist Zhao three solid days (at a cost of around $15k) to build his amazing looking sculpture of Nick from Zootopia, and it was only on display at the LEGO Expo in Ningbo, China for an hour before a kid knocked it down.

Zhao declined compensation from the kid's parents because he feels the kid didn't do it on purpose, but if a rival LEGO artist suddenly sells a statue of Nick from Zootopia we'll know exactly what that little destroyer was up to...

-Via Mashable

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Disabling Right Click Is A Joke

Don't you hate it when you go to save an image on a site by right clicking only to find right clicking has been disabled?

Now you're forced to use your screen capture software, or to hunt down the image in the source code, and in the end they're usually protecting an image that doesn't even belong to them.

Get wise, sitesters, and stop disabling right click or, as this comic from CommitStrip shows, the Coders will come for you...

-Via Geeks Are Sexy

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The Onion's Short Guide To Beach Etiquette

Unless you live near a beach you visit regularly you probably don't think much about beach etiquette, and that's okay when you're not at the beach.

Help lifeguards do their jobs by letting them know in advance if you plan to drown that day

But when you go to the beach, and the black socks under your sandals start to fill up with sand, it's time to get to etiquetting (etiquettery? etiquetness?) so as not to perturb the “locals”.

When using a portable radio or other music-playing device, keep the volume at a low level for all but the most epic of guitar solos

Having lived my entire life twenty minutes from the beach has taught me these “locals” aren't really local at all, but they still take their beach etiquette very seriously, that is, when they're not busy playing frisbee.

Shout “Heads up!” in the half-second before your Frisbee corkscrews into a crowd of sunbathers

Here's another handy tip for ya courtesy of The Onion, and if you decide to disregard those annoying beach "locals" don't forget the ocean is full of locals too...

Always loudly scream “Shark!” while standing at the edge of the water to ensure everyone is aware that so many species of sharks are endangered and will go extinct if not protected from commercial fishing

Read The Onion's Guide To Beach Etiquette here

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Makeup Effects Pro's Account Causes Controversy On Instagram

Calling an Instagram account “the most controversial” instantly makes people think it's full of nudity, profanity, or horrifyingly violent material, but controversy is in the eye of the beholder.

Therefore you'll either see Marc Clancy's Powdah FX Instagram account as really gross, extremely controversial or one of the coolest social media accounts out there, and that's because Marc is a bit of a sicko.

The Powdah FX Instagram page is full of photos of Marc's amazing makeup work, much of which involves optical illusions that make the wounds seem more grievous, and some people think his work looks a bit too realistic.

But Marc thumbs his nose at those nervous Nellies and keeps posting his unnervingly realistic makeup fx works to Instagram, so people can see how his mind works.

See more from This Guy Runs The Most Controversial Instagram Account here

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Some Banks Clearly Aren't Ready For Millennials To Open Savings Accounts

When people say Millennials are making an impact on society the statement is usually kept vague on purpose, because that impact isn't generally quantifiable.

But one particular Millennial made an undeniable impact on the banking industry when he tried to use an emoji as his savings account nickname.

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How long do you think it will be before a Millennial officially changes their name to an emoji?

-Via FAILBlog

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The Game Show That Could Have Killed Its Contestants

Extreme game shows are so popular that show creators keep pushing their shows, and the contestants foolhardy enough to participate, as far as they can go without killing them.

Contestants died after appearing on the shows Wipeout and Survivor, due to health reasons so not totally the show's fault, and a guy almost drowned on the show Dog Eat Dog.

But no game show has tried to kill its contestants quite like Fox's The Chamber, where people were strapped into a torture chamber and forced to endure killer conditions for $100k.

(YouTube Link)

Only 3 episodes of The Chamber were aired back in 2002 (even though six episodes were shot), and only one conestant ever made it through all seven rounds of torture.

With this laundry list of torturous conditions it's no wonder:

In the Hot Chamber, the contestant faced the following:

  • Heat beginning at 110°F (43°C) and increasing to 170°F (66°C).
  • Real flames surrounding the contestant, getting bigger as the game progressed.
  • Muscle contractors strapped to the limbs.
  • Simulated earthquake tremors (Richter scale 5.0 to begin, going up to 9.0).
  • The chair would begin to rotate back and forth (level two), then up and down, through 270 degrees, and finally it would spin in complete circles.
  • On the last show, foul odors were piped into the Chamber after the fourth round.
  • Wind gusts of 40 miles per hour (64.3 k/h) joined in at level two.
  • Falling oxygen levels throughout the game (90 percent down to 70 percent).
  • Air cannons blasting at up to 140 miles per hour.

If the Cold Chamber was chosen, this is what the contestant got:

  • Temperatures beginning at 30°F (-1 °C) and decreasing to -20°F (-29°C).Muscle contractors and simulated earthquake tremors (as in the Hot Chamber).
  • Water jets squirting the contestants, causing ice to form on their bodies.
  • Ice blasted at the contestant.
  • Wind gusts of 40 miles per hour (64.3 k/h) from level three onwards.
  • Falling oxygen levels (95 percent down to 70 percent).
  • Air cannons blasting at up to 140 mph (as in the Hot Chamber).

Read about The Game Show That Could Have Killed Its Contestants at mental_floss


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Man Ignores Museum Rules, Destroys Priceless Clock

Museums don't post “Please don't touch” signs because they're being snooty jerks, they post these signs hoping museum visitors will have enough smarts to realize the objects on display are often priceless and irreplaceable.

But some visitors can't help but go full blown Mr. Bean when they're among precious artifacts, and the results are just as disastrous as they are on TV, only not as funny.

A man visiting the National Watch and Clock museum in Columbia, Pennsylvania got the bright idea to paw at a priceless clock on the wall and, as expected, disaster ensued.

(YouTube Link)

This is why we can't have nice things!

-Via Know Your Meme

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Dad Trolls Daughter Over Her Dumb Tattoo

(Image via @teenagepuppy)

Sometimes kids make terrible decisions that aren't directly harmful or life ruining and their parents have to stand by their side while the kid deals with the fallout of their mistakes.

They aren't being enablers or living in denial, they're just being supportive and caring parents who don't want their child to hurt anymore than they have to when they mess up.

Luckily, parents have the ability to be supportive and troll their kids at the same time.

When Ann's cutup of a dad found out about her bad tattoo he started sending her pics of his own version, which admittedly looks a whole lot tougher than that itty bitty butcher knife on Ann's arm.

People probably would have hated on his trolling too if he didn't look so darn tough in this shot. Don't mess with his daughter or he'll cut ya!

-Via FAILBlog

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Celebrities With Surprising Backstories

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It's not surprising when celebrities reveal they come from normal or privileged backgrounds, but when they had to overcome really bad situations to become big stars their backstory becomes inspirational.

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Some stars, like Charlize Theron or Joaquin Phoenix, don't like to talk about their past because it was so bad, and in Charlize's case I don't blame her for staying silent.

Charlize grew up with a father who physically and mentally abused her and her mother, and the abuse got so bad Charlize's mom killed the man in self defense when Charlize was 15 years old.

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As for Joaquin's backstory it's more embarrassing than horrifying- his family was part of a cult called “Children Of God”, who traveled across South America as missionaries.

The family changed their last name from Bottom to Phoenix after they left the cult, as a symbol of rebirth.

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And speaking of rebirth, young actress Leighton Meester was tied into her family's criminal activity from birth- because Leighton's mom Connie was pregnant with her when she, and three other family members, were arrested for smuggling 1,200 pounds of marijuana into the country.

Leighton's mom gave birth to her while in prison, and her aunt made the Ten Most Wanted list when she escaped from prison, making the crime that is Gossip Girl pale in comparison.

Read 33 Shocking Stories About Celebrities With Surprising Pasts here

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Get Your Bod In Shape For Summer With One Of These Sunny Funny T-Shirts

Summer Classic by Leon

The weather is warming up fast, and people are making plans for their summer getaways and starting to get in better shape so they can hit the beach.

But you don't need to hit a spin class or go crossfit crazy to look good this summer- all you need is a NeatoShop t-shirt on your torso and you'll be looking like a million bucks!

And if you order from the NeatoShop by June 5th you'll get FREE WORLDWIDE SHIPPING on all orders!

Everybody has their own way of preparing for summer fun

All Night Long by cart00nlion

Some hit the weights hard so they look like a buff boss

Etheria Gym by JozVoz

While others just keep doing what they love to do late into those long summer days

Wonderful by Hillary White

Continue reading

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Hollywood's Old Age Makeup Versus How Actors Actually Look When They're Older

Hollywood makeup artists have perfected the art of transforming actors into any character imaginable, and yet old age makeup remains one of the hardest transformations to pull off.

Between the subtle ways our facial features change as we age, to the fact that applying too many prosthetics makes the actor look like they're wearing a Halloween mask, old age makeup is still the pinnacle of the practical fx industry.

But how many times have Hollywood makeup artists correctly guessed how an actor will look when they grow old?

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As this video by YouTuber filminick shows they're usually pretty far off, but that's because they have to exaggerate for the screen, or they're doing a Benjamin Button style character who isn't necessarily supposed to look like the actor.

Still, who could have foreseen this transformation?

(Image Link)

-Via GeekTyrant

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Illustrator Imagines Chewbacca As Comical Visual Puns

If you could understand what the heck that walking furball is saying you'd discover that Chewbacca is actually a pretty funny fellow, and that's no small feat considering Wookiees have very little patience for comedy.

Chewie prefers pun based comedy to slapstick or observational humor, and when he gets rolling with those puns there's no stopping him.

Of course, it doesn't hurt that he's a massive creature with fangs and elite combat skills, and even audiences who don't fully appreciate his brand of comedy laugh when he delivers the punny.

Illustrator Joe Stone does a great job of bringing Chewie's puns to life via pen and ink in his series "Drewbacca", which follows in the footsteps of his "Drawntroopers" project. Check 'em out and LOL, or aarrragghuuhw as the case may be.

See more Humorous Illustrations Of Chewbacca As Comical Visual Puns here

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Animated Short About A Guy Who Gets Fired From His Job On Mars

If you get fired from your graphic design job here on Earth it's not the end of the world because there are plenty of other job opportunities out there for you, especially if you have an impressive portfolio.

But if you get fired from your job on Mars you're pretty much screwed, as Jeff the graphic designer discovered in this aptly titled animated short “Fired On Mars” by Nate Sherman and Nick Vokey. (Barely NSFW due to language)

(Vimeo Link)

Don't you hate it when you get a call from some fleece-wearing butthead? Yeah, me too...

-Via Laughing Squid

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Giant Golf Course Alligator Wanders Into Jurassic Park

If you saw the article Miss C recently posted about the giant alligator who nonchalantly walked across a golf course in Florida then you know it was only a matter of time before the gator wandered into Jurassic Park.

(YouTube Link)

The inevitable Jurassic Park video mashup is definitely an internet "thing" nowadays, so there's sure to be another video like this one put together by YouTuber Pim Roes coming up again soon!

-Via Memebase

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Back In My Day Dad Rants About The Early Internet

It has officially been more than twenty years since the internet became mainstream, so now those pioneers who lived through dial-up modems and the AOL disc-aster can talk to the youngsters about the “good old days”.

But heed this illustrated warning from C-SECTION COMICS and keep your ranting under control or you may end up facing assault charges.

-Via Geeks Are Sexy

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When New York Was Truly The City That Never Sleeps

To quote Grandmaster Flash “New York, New York big city of dreams, and everything in New York ain't always what it seems”, a perfectly concise summary of what makes New York such a great place to be a misfit.

The New York we know today is far more gentrified, visually scrutinized and whitewashed in the media, and is actually becoming a less nightmarish place to live- if you can afford the rent.

But back when most anyone could afford to live there, circa the 1980s, the New York City streets were a seedy, drug-fueled and very “alive” place.

NYC was truly a 24-hour town- and usually not in the good way.

(YouTube Link)

The NYC street scene was full of crime, drugs and police corruption, but the extreme economic inequality resulted in something rather surprising- hope, and community pride.

The citizens of NYC managed to keep hope alive by banding together, coming out of a long, dark decade stronger as a community because they stuck together through it all.

See more photos from When Crack Was King: 1980s New York here

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Profile for Zeon Santos

  • Member Since 2012/08/04


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