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People who wind up in prison often learn skills while they're locked up to help them get a job when they finish their sentence, but a felony on your record reduces your job options to virtually nil.

So ex-cons are often forced to take whichever job they can get, and all that training on the inside ironically ends up being worthless on the outside due to their criminal record.

Writer and ex-con Seth Ferranti spoke with other ex-cons about the worst jobs they've had since they got out, and their answers were bad but not quite as bad as you'd expect.

Seth thought being a sauté cook sucked, but after talking to a guy who worked eleven hours a day cleaning cow crap, a guy who picked up trash at the city dump and, worst of all, a telemarketer he discovered cooking ain't so bad after all!

Read Ex-Cons Remember Their Worst Jobs After Being Released From Prison here

It's go time. #jjcrochetinNYC #speedcrochet #lightscameraaction

A photo posted by Jayna Grassel (@jaynagrassel) on Mar 4, 2016 at 1:08pm PST

I'm constantly impressed by the talented artists who show off their skills online, and their videos are doubly impressive when the skill they're showing off takes years to master and the crafter is working at a blazing fast pace.

Here's a perfect example- a video filmed by Wired/Condé-Nast showing speed crocheter Jayna Grassel crafting a yarn flower in under 90 seconds.

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Jayna creates a ludicrously speedy 71 stitches per minute in the video, and says she can actually work faster when she's not uncomfortably positioned for the sake of the camera:

I went up, saw the studio, met a bunch of people and they told me to stand behind a table and crochet while they shot aerially. Um, I don’t crochet standing up. That’s crazy. So they got me a chair and I repositioned myself. But to be honest, it still wasn’t great. As any crocheter will attest, when you crochet your elbows rest almost at your hips, hands at about mid-stomach level. Normal. To get a shot, they had me stretch out my hands so they were centered over a table... It was strange and I’ll admit didn’t set me up to do my best. I was dropping stitches and wasn’t as fast as I’d been practicing.

-Via Laughing Squid

Bowser looks and talks like a big badass, and acts like he has a chip on his shoulder towards moustachioed plumbers, but the truth is he's just extremely lonely, jealous and desperate for a girlfriend.

So comic artist FigmentForm naturally figured Ganondorf could show Bowser the way to Princess Peach's heart when she created this guest piece for Manly Guys Doing Manly Things, and boy was she right!

-Via Geeks Are Sexy

Some people don't really want or need anything on the hex mat when they're playing a tabletop roleplaying game, preferring to play solely using the power of imagination.

For the rest of us it's nice to have some visual elements to enhance our experience, including miniatures that actually fit our characters and some terrain pieces.

But miniatures master crafter Ryan Devoto wasn't content with using but a few measley scenic pieces for his Dungeons & Dragons campaign- he wanted a setting his miniatures could truly call home.

So Ryan, along with Michael Tiskus of Terranscapes, built an epic scale D&D diorama complete with a port full of ships, a village, a massive castle with full interior and more.

With a diorama so detailed and varied in terms of environment types the campaign practically writes itself!

See more detail shots from Ryan's amazing D&D diorama here

-Via Nerd Approved

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Green seemed to be a dominant color in the Olympic Games Rio 2016- the green Reals Brazil paid to host the games, the green courts and fields where the games were played, the green backdrops, the green water in the pool...

It's not easy being green... #greenpool #RioOlympics2016 pic.twitter.com/cDy3SnYQAW

— Lucy Knight (@lucymk) August 9, 2016

It's safe to say green is the color which best symbolizes the 2016 Olympics, so creating some “green screened” Olympic moments makes perfect sense!

Sorry NBC but a green backdrop is asking for trouble. pic.twitter.com/Ad9ULnDdYh

— shut up, mike (@shutupmikeginn) August 17, 2016

The green backdrops found throughout the Games made it easy for digital manipulator and Imgur user factionman to place the tennis court in any environment- so he naturally chose outer space.

(via GIPHY)

And even the gymnasts discovered they weren't safe from the green screen treatment even though they performed their floor routines on a tan mat.

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-Via Mashable, CollegeHumor, PetaPixel

There are too many gruff, cold and closeminded dads in the world as it is, what we need now are guys willing to be warm and loving fathers and boost their kids up instead of tearing them down.

Adam Perry is one of those kinder, gentler dads who discovered his daughter could only eat plain toast with sunflower oil for breakfast due to severe food allergies- so he found a way to make a bland breakfast fun.

He started using slices of toast to make food sculptures, and what started out as simple toasty shapes soon became a food sculpture smorgasbord.

Now his daughter isn't stuck eating plain old toast in the morning, she's eating tropical islands, bread crabs, bungalows, sail boats and boom boxes, or the most meta of them all- the toaster made out of toast.

See A Toast To This Dad Who Makes Edible Sculptures For His Daughter With Food Allergies here

Our pets are seen as a reflection of ourselves, and people reckon they can glean information about our personality, lifestyle and temperament from the types of pets we own.

And while this isn't always true, especially when it comes to dog owners, there's always at least one person who lives up to the stereotype in each group of owners.

People who own snakes aren't always creepy, but there's always that one guy who thinks it's fine to make out with his salmonella-infested serpent when people are over.

And then there are the people who own a bunch of cats or ferrets and refuse to acknowledge that their house always smells like animal urine.

But at least they actually own their pets and don't smell like they're covered in their own urine, that's when you start getting into a whole new level of creepiness.

Of course, you don't have to be homeless to be a totally deranged pet owner, just ask the crazy cat lady who can't remember exactly how many kitties she has roaming around in her house.

And no matter what anybody tells you human ownership is not okay and never was, so when your Gimp tells you he's yours to do with what you will he's speaking figuratively.

Take it from comic artist extraordinaire Caldwell Tanner and let the Gimps roam free!

-Via CollegeHumor

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Dogs sometimes refuse to take no for an answer when they're desperate to say hello, and no bush, wall or fence can keep them from shoving their head through to greet their neighbor face to face.

This almost manic drive to see who or what is living next door can result in wrecked fences, tunnels dug in the dirt under walls, and a sad little pooch with a stupid look on his face when he realizes he's stuck.

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Of course, not all dogs are saddened by the prospect of being stuck, because they're just happy to be out of the house!

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See 10+ Desperate Dogs Who Just Want To Say Hi here

Delightfully mad sculptor David Cranmer makes functional art pieces that put the fun in funky, and his strange contraptions often make a pretty funky racket too.

We've featured his Musical Liquer-Dispensing Machine, his Duck Machine, his Stuffed Badger Theremin and his Furby Gurdy here on Neatorama before, so we obviously give a hoot about David's amazing musical sculptures.

But this owl theremin is my favorite of the bunch by far, because it would look right at home in the Great Northern Hotel, the Addams Family house or the Haunted Mansion...or my house!

Flipping the switch labeled "Activate Owl" causes the owl to arise while the theremin starts up, and as the player waves their hand to make sweet, spooky "music" the owl silently judges them from on high.

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-Via Dangerous Minds

Reports keep coming out that claim the food served by chain restaurants such as The Cheesecake Factory, Uno Pizzeria & Grill and Buffalo Wild Wings is really bad for our bodies.

But those reports couldn't possibly be referring to the entire menu at every restaurant, so which menu items are the worst, and how bad are they?

That's the basis of the Center for Science in the Public Interest's research into the least healthy menu items being served by chain restaurants across the country, a list so long they had to narrow it down to nine items.

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High on the Xtreme Eating List is The Cheesecake Factory's Fried Chicken & Waffles Benedict, which weighs in at 86 grams of saturated fat and 2580 calories.

Buffalo Wild Wing's Dessert Nachos aren't far behind with 2100 calories, but Uno Pizzeria & Grill's weighs in even larger with their whopping 2850 calorie Whole Hog Burger.

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Why do these lists always make me so hungry?

Read Scientists Identify the Least Healthy Foods at Chain Restaurants at mental_floss

Many articles and comics you see posted online would have you believe the world is divided into two camps- extroverts and introverts.

But I constantly find myself sitting square in the middle of the two worlds, happy to go out and celebrate life with friends one day then homebound and dreading human interaction the next.

So, in order to better understand these two halves of my whole, I like to read about what makes an introvert or extrovert tick, hoping to merge the two into a nice, normal version of me.

Which is why I found Dr. Carmella's Guide To Understanding The Introverted by RomanJones so enlightening, because his hamster ball theory is spot on and easy to describe to your fellow introverts.

So next time you feel like human interaction is leeching all of your energy you'll know why, and those who don't fall on the introvert side of the spectrum will know how to properly deal with their "reclusive" friends and family members.

-Via Co.Create

It's hard for some people to describe how much they love animals, because they have an easier time showing their admiration for the animal kingdom with their actions.

This passion is what drove Krzystof Chomicz to become a wildlife photographer, and what made him decide to rescue a dying white-tailed eagle from the thick coastal mud and nurse it back to health.

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Krzystof spotted the dying eagle near the Polish seaside town of Swinoujscie, stuck in the mud after the tide washed out, and his one man rescue operation was filmed by news cameras and drones.

But Krzystof proved he wasn't in it for the glory by spending the time and effort to treat the wounded raptor until he was fit for flight, setting his newfound friend free to hunt and soar again.

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-Via Laughing Squid

Between Thor's presence in the Marvel movies and the hit History channel show there is a renewed interest in those savage Nordic warriors known collectively as the Vikings.

Known for their ingenuity and hardiness as much as their ferocity in combat, the Vikings were a diverse and loosely banded group of clans whose heroes were hardly what you'd call heroic.

Have you heard tales about the great Viking hero Erik the Red? Turns out his fellow Vikings saw Erik as too violent.

Erik found trouble with his fellow Vikings wherever he called home, and having a disagreement with Erik meant you and yours would be killed in cold blood.

His life was a series of deadly brawls and banishment, but he did sire the great explorer Leif Erikson, so his life wasn't all death and destruction.

Speaking of death and bodily dismemberment- it's funny that the Vikings found Erik to be such a brute, considering Vikings were known for bloody duels called Holmgangs, ritual sacrifice, infanticide and a brutal torture technique called the Blood Eagle.

Read 10 Horrifying Facts About Vikings here

Brexit by  SergioDoe

Dear Britain- you may have divorced the EU, but please don't Brexit from our lives and keep your awesome movies and TV shows from your fans overseas!

Where would we be without Benny, Monty, the IT and the Boosh? Lost in a sea of mediocrity, that's where, and we at the NeatoShop love British TV shows so much we wear our love on our chest!

British sci-fi opened our minds to a great big galaxy full of awesomeness

The Who by Vincent Trinidad

Enchanted us with their bold new vision of comedy

The Enchanter by kgullholmen

And charmed us with compelling characters who solved the boring TV problem

Watercolor Detective by Traceygurney

God save you, British entertainment industry, and keep you sharing your great shows with us all!

God Save The Queen by In Stank We Trust

Every day people take a swig from a bottle of mouthwash, swish, gargle and spit for the sake of oral health, but do they know what they're putting in their mouth?

The active ingredients in most mouthwashes are menthol, eucalyptol, methyl salicylate and thymol, powerful antiseptics and antifungals with a lot of different uses that you probably shouldn't swallow.

The antifungal properties in mouthwash make it great for soaking your feet, as it helps prevent athlete's foot and toe fungus, and it's good to disinfect your toothbrush in it for the same reason.

Now those uses make sense, but here's where the strange comes in- you can use mouthwash to wash your laundry.

Instructables author Penolopy Bulnick on her experience washing laundry with mouthwash:

Use about a cup of mouthwash instead of laundry detergent when you're in a pinch. I highly recommend using a more colorless and sugar-free mouthwash for this. I used what you see and didn't have any problems, but I avoided washing any whites or nice close just in case. I did wash a tan towel and it still came out tan.

Read 14+ Unusual Uses For Mouthwash here