Miss Cellania's Blog Posts

An Apology to Women

The following is an article from The Annals of Improbable Research.

(Image credit: Flickr user butupa)

How to make science popular with the fair sex
by Sylvester Bames, PhD.
Royal Academy of the Sciences London, England

It has always dismayed me that women dislike science. It needn't be so, though. There is a simple way to make science comfortable and appealing to females.

The Differences Between Men and Women
An American author called Deborah Tannen has written several books in which she examines the differences between men and women. Tannen has discovered a basic technique that I would recommend to every scientist, and indeed to anyone who writes about science. The secret is simply to use the phrase "I'm sorry."

Tannen eavesdropped on many conversations between men and women. She also listened to tape recorded conversations that friends and colleagues had made for her. One of the great differences between the sexes, Tannen discovered, is thai women utter the phrase ''I'm sorry" in almost every conversation. Men say "I'm sorry" only when they are apologizing about something.

The Success of Women
When women say "I'm sorry," they are not apologizing. They are using the phrase as "a ritual to grease the conversational wheels." All women understand this, Tannen explains. They do not expect the words to be taken literally. However -and this is the key point- women expect everyone to use this same ritual when speaking to them.<p style="clear: both">

The Failure of Men
Men do not say "I'm sorry" all the time. This is a grave mistake. As Tannen neatly puts it, “This can lead to resentment on the part of the ritual apologizer." In other words, when a man fails to say a ritual ''I'm sorry," he comes across as a self-centered, domineering lout.

This is useful knowledge, and we should all be grateful to Tannen for pointing it out.

How to Make Science Appealing to Women
Whether you are lecturing about science or writing about science, here is how to make it palatable to women.

Prepare your lecture or your paper in the normal manner. When you have polished it, and are prepared to deliver the talk or publish the report, you must take one extra step. It is a simple thing. At the beginning of your report, just add an apology. There is no need to specify what you are apologizing for. Just begin with the words ''I'm sorry." At the end of your report, apologize again.

If your report is lengthy, you need to sustain the interest of the females. It's not a bad idea to add an apology at the beginning of every new chapter or section. An average of one apology every ten minutes will suffice.

Do this, and you will soon find that your scientific reports are as fascinating to women as they are to men. Professionally, it will expand your circle of influence. Socially, too, it will work wonders. You will be amazed that, after years of thinking that females are put off by scientists, you have become the life of the party.

Sorry Advice
To summarize-when you talk about science, say "I'm sorry," and say it often. Then you will never have to apologize for being a scientist.

(Image credit: Flickr user Andrew Yee)

References
That's Not What I Meant!: How Conversational Style Makes or Breaks Your Relations With Others, Deborah Tannen, William Morrow, Ballantine, New York, 1986.

You Just Don't Understand, Deborah Tannen, William Morrow, New York, 1990.

Talking from 9 to 5. Women and Men in the Workplace: Language, Sex and Power, Deborah Tannen, Avon Books, New York, 1994.

_____________________

This article is republished with permission from the May-June 1998 issue of the Annals of Improbable Research. You can purchase back issues of the magazine or subscribe to receive future issues, in printed or in ebook form. Or get a subscription for someone as a gift!

Visit their website for more research that makes people LAUGH and then THINK.


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If I Had Known My Mother Back Then

Graphic artist Danielle Delph shows us a very personal project in which she combed through old family photographs and matched some from her childhood with those of her mother’s childhood. And then combined them.

I've always wondered if my mom and I would have been friends had we grown up together. Would we be in the same classes? Would we have the same sense of humor? Would people tell us we're inseparable? After seeing myself in her childhood photos, I'm pretty sure we would have been great friends..

Melding the images gives us a pair of intergenerational best friends. See the sweet results in six images at Delph’s website. You can tell who is who by the hairstyles and clothing. -via mental_floss


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How to Give a Panda His Medicine

(YouTube link)

You think trying to work on a computer with a curious cat around is hard? This poor zookeeper needs to dose two young pandas with medicine, but they have other things in mind- like climbing, cuddling, and playing! It appears akin to trying to teach something important to a roomful of preschoolers at their peak energy time. And you can’t give medicine during a nap! -via Daily Picks and Flicks

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Spicing Up Supreme Court Coverage

(YouTube link)

News from the Supreme Court is extremely important, but since cameras are not allowed during hearings, the audio-only TV coverage is far from interesting. John Oliver has a wonderful idea to get people to watch SC news stories: use footage of dogs! To that end, his production team made an entire reel of “stock footage” which can be used to illustrate any sound bite from Supreme Court hearings. Each individual Justice is included, as well as lawyers and other court employees. 

(YouTube link)

And in case you like that idea, here is the entire reel, which can be excerpted as necessary. There is no soundtrack, but once you start watching, you won’t want to stop. -via Daily Picks and Flicks

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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OSU Marching Band Does Classic Rock

(YouTube link)

When Ohio State played Rutgers on Saturday, TBDBITL marched and gave us a tribute to classic rock. The complicated formations include a pinball machine (during "Pinball Wizard," of course) and a musician smashing a guitar onstage. Honestly, we really don’t post the Ohio State Marching Band’s halftime show every week, just when it’s awesome. -via Uproxx


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10 True Stories of Survival Cannibalism

The idea of eating human flesh is abhorrent to most folks, but the truth is people, like animals, will eat anything when the alternative is dying of starvation. And most of us understand the vast difference between eating available corpses and murder. However, in the ten stories of people who survived starvation through cannibalism, there are a few that involved murder, although the details are sketchy. Self defense? That's what one claimed. In other cases, it was "either him or me," or helping along those who were about to die sooner or later. Read ten tales of desperation that led to cannibalism at How Stuff Works.   


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The Horror Movie House Quiz

When you watch a horror film, you can be excused for not remembering the details, like the architecture. But maybe you’ve seen these movies more than once, or maybe even recently. Can you identify the houses, haunted or not, from Hollywood’s biggest horror movies? The first one in the Buzzfeed quiz is a gimme, especially if you’ve followed Neatorama for a few years. The rest, well, you’re on your own. I scored eight out of ten, which is more of the movies than I’d actually seen, because I’m a good guesser.


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What the World Eats

National Geographic brings us an interactive data visualization project that breaks down world food consumption. As you can see, globally, we consume more grains than anything. The staff of life, you know. At the site, you can mouseover the graph and break these categories down further: rice beats out wheat, just barely, with maize (corn) a distant third. But the United States’ graph is quite different, with sugar and fat taking up 37% of our diet! There are also plenty of graphs on meat consumption, which has grown considerably per capita over the past few decades. Not so much in the U.S., as we always ate more meat than other countries, and not so much in India, where meat eating is still relatively rare. There are plenty of graphs to explore and compare at NatGeo.

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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The Great Diamond Hoax of 1872

The following is an article from Uncle John's Curiously Compelling Bathroom Reader

(Image credit:  Flickr user  kawaiikiri)

 Most stories have the moral at the end. But we’ll put it right up front: If it seems too good to be true, it probably is.

NIGHT DEPOSIT

One evening in February 1871, George Roberts, a prominent San Francisco businessman, was working in his office when two men came to his door. One of them, Philip Arnold, had once worked for Roberts; the other was named John Slack. Arnold produced a small leather bag and explained that it contained something very valuable; as soon as the Bank of California opened in the morning, he was going to have them lock it in the vault for safekeeping.

Arnold and Slack made a show of not wanting to reveal what was in the bag, but eventually told Roberts that it contained “rough diamonds” they’d found while prospecting on a mesa somewhere in the West. They wouldn’t say where the mesa was, but they did say it was the richest mineral deposit they’d ever seen in their lives: The site was rich not only in diamonds, but also in sapphires, emeralds, rubies, and other precious stones.

The story sounded too good to be true, but when Arnold dumped the contents of the bag onto Robert’s desk, out spilled dozens of uncut diamonds and other gems.

PAY DIRT



If someone were to make such a claim today, they’d probably get laughed out of the room. But things were different in 1871. Only 20 years had passed since the discovery of gold at Sutter’s Mill in California spiked the greatest gold rush in American history. Since then other huge gold deposits had been discovered in Colorado, as well as in Australia and New Zealand. A giant vein of silver had been found in the famous Comstock Lode in Nevada in 1859, and diamonds had been discovered in South Africa in 1867- just four years earlier. Gems and precious metals might be anywhere, lying just below the earth’s surface, waiting to be discovered. People who’d missed out on the earlier bonanzas were hungry for word of new discoveries, and the completion of the transcontinental railroad in 1869 opened up the West and create the expectation that more valuable strikes were just around the corner. When Arnold and Slack rolled into town with their tale of gems on a mesa and a bag of precious stones to back it up, people were ready to believe them.

OPEN SECRET

The next morning the two men went to the Bank of California and deposited their bag in the bank’s vault. They made another big show of not wanting anyone to know what was in the bag, and again they let some of the bank employees have a peek. Soon everyone in the bank knew what was in it, including the president and founder, William Ralston. He had made a fortune off the Comstock Lode, and had his eye out for the next big find. Ralston didn’t keep the men’s secret, and neither did George Roberts: Soon all of San Francisco, the city built by the Gold Rush of 1849, was buzzing with the tale of the two miners and their discovery.

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A Tale of Momentum and Inertia

(vimeo link)

A rock creature does what he has to do in this really short story from House Special. I love how expressive his face is; it's the exact opposite of the “stone face” you’d expect. And since it’s just animation, you can laugh without feeling guilty. -via reddit


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Finnish Cough Drop Ad

(YouTube link)

This is an ad for Zyx, a brand of cough drops sold in Finland and Sweden. You can see what’s going to happen a mile away, but it’s still amusing. It makes a strange kind of sense, since every time I listen to black metal singing, it makes my throat hurt. Just watching this on TV could sell a lot of cough drops!  -via Daily Picks and Flicks


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America’s Favorite Sandwich Fillings

According to a study by the Centers for Disease Control, 49% of American will eat at least one sandwich on any given day. That’s really not so shocking; I eat one most days, if not two. And why not? A sandwich is easy to eat while working, requires no dish or utensil, and you can put just about anything in it. Most can be eaten with one hand. That’s why the sandwich was invented in the first place! What is a little surprising is the findings about what Americans put in their sandwiches.

As you can tell from the graph, lettuce is on more sandwiches than any other ingredient. That’s because it automatically goes on so many store-bought sandwiches of all kinds, and there are no other vegetables that produce as much crunch. However, if you look closer, you can see that “Cheddar or American cheese” shows up three times in the graph, depending on how it was described. If those were combined, they would be at the top. Personally, I’m surprised that peanut butter isn’t much higher on the list. You can read more about the study, and see what kind of breads we’re using on sandwiches, at FiveThirtyEight. -via Digg   

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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Whodunit: An Attack of Gas

The following is a Whodunit by Hy ConradThese mysteries are from The Little Giant® Book of Whodunits by Hy Conrad and Matt LaFleur. Can you solve the mystery before you read the solution?

(Image credit: Flickr user Ann Fisher)

The island of Canary Rock had no police force and none was really needed—not until the fateful morning when Gerald Espy was found dead in his bed. The millionaire had been laid up with a broken leg, and although the local doctor was adept at setting bones, he was not well versed in murder. It wasn't until he saw the dead cat curled up in a corner that he even suspected foul play.

"Poison gas," the inspector guessed when he arrived. An empty glass container on the table was the primary evidence. "Pour one chemical on another." He pointed to the dead flies on the windowsill at the east end of the room. "In less than a minute everything in the room would be dead."

The body had been discovered by Espy's son, Melvin. "I was out with some friends on my boat. I dropped them off at about midnight, then motored back to Canary Rock. There were no lights on at the house, but every now and then the moon would peek through. I figured Dad was asleep. So I locked up the house and went straight to bed. This morning, I went to check up. He was dead."

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Love games and puzzles? Visit NeatoPuzzles for more!

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The Immune System

That’s a very succinct and understandable way to explain what your immune system is doing to you. If you ask me, it’s a fairly decent tradeoff for not dying of the flu or an ingrown hair. A little Benedryl should help. This is the latest comic from Tree Lobsters.


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Working with Cats Around

(YouTube link)

Working at home is wonderful, but it has its drawbacks. My kids have been on fall break this past week, which makes getting anything done difficult. However, they did clean up the house. The cats won’t do that. They just want your undivided attention while you’re home with them. Cole and Marmalade (previously at Neatorama) demonstrate exactly what working around cats is like. At least I’m in a position to put all the cats outside when they get too annoying. -via Fark

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Throwing Paint at a Ferrari

We’ve seen artist Fabian Oefner do some amazing things with space, time, and paint. His latest project involves a wind tunnel, UV paint, and a Ferrari. Yes, he threw brightly-colored paint at a Ferrari, to illustrate the feel of driving one. First I thought, “Cool!” but then the Mom in me wondered if it was washable paint. There were plenty of cameras rolling during the paint process, which were turned into videos of various lengths to be used as Ferrari ads. See those videos, and more pictures, too, at PetaPixel. -via mental_floss


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I've Fallen, and I Can't Get Up!

(vimeo link)

This is an animation test. Yes, none of these lemmings people exist in real life (not even Waldo), so no one was harmed in the test. Creator Dave Fothergill vfx says,

Crowd dynamics test using Miarmy for Maya.
Shows the new servo force feature which allows struggling animation once the agent has become dynamic

Which means nothing to me, but digital animators will recognize the terms. If you are interested in the technical aspects, there’s more in the comments at vimeo. To most of us, it’s just a hilariously goofy sequence that you shouldn’t feel bad about laughing at. -via Metafilter 

Update: And now there's a looping version with sound effects and music.


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The Hobbit in 72 Seconds -in LEGO

(YouTube link)

You could invest nine hours or so into watching the The Hobbit movies (after waiting for the last one to be released in December), or you could watch the condensed version in this stop-motion LEGO video from BrotherhoodWorkshop. I tried to read The Hobbit about 40 years ago and couldn’t finish it. I haven’t seen any of The Hobbit movies, either. So I watched this and laughed because even at the breakneck speed of the condensed story, there was still time for jokes. Spoilers? I don’t know; I really don’t feel I’ve been spoiled watching this. One who knows mentioned in the YouTube comments that this was more faithful to the book than the Peter Jackson films. -via Geeks Are Sexy


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Police Hunt Man in Spotty Onesie

Do you know any adult who wears a polka-dot onesie (footed pajamas) and has a friend with pink-purple leggings? A pair wearing this clothing was captured on CCTV footage at the Dewsbury train station in West Yorkshire, England. They were recorded taking a computer monitor from the station on October 6th, and are suspected of taking two others on October 5th. 

“We are releasing their images in that hope that, despite their faces being covered, someone may recognise their distinctive dress.

“We believe they may be able to assist our enquiries into this incident and are investigating whether they are linked to the other two thefts.”

The publicity should also serve as a warning to anyone thinking of attending a Halloween costume party in these getups. It could lead to your arrest. -via Arbroath


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How to Dance to AC/DC

(YouTube link)

A group of Bulgarian folk dancers hoof it to the AC/DC song “Thunderstruck.” It works, because they are obviously having a great time! Whatever this dance is called, it sure looks like old fashioned hillbilly clogging to me, which is probably as universal as AC/DC music. -via Daily Picks and Flicks


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Have You Ever Seen a Lock Like This?

(YouTube link)

Bosnian Bill has found a lock he cannot pick. Just wait until you see why not! This clever mechanism works in a different way from most locks, as it’s not straight. It’s a rare, complicated, and presumably expensive lock for which most locksmiths could not duplicate a key. Lose or break your key, and the whole thing would be rather useless. I'd never let any of my kids near that key. -via reddit


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Inside a Pneumatic Tube

(YouTube link)

If you’ve ever dealt with pneumatic tubes, which are still used at many drive-through bank branches, you’ve probably thought about what it would be like to be inside one. What we have here is the next best thing. A couple of Norwegians YouTubers put a GoPro camera inside a canister and sent it on its way. For the first part of the trip, the camera is pointed out the back end, but the canister eventually reverses itself and we can see where it’s going. Yeah, I believe riding inside one of those would be a pretty dizzying experience. -via Metafilter


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X-Men have Vanity Plates

Now we know where Professor X is from, and what sweet ride he has! Redditor funboixero spotted this car in Houston. He saw the driver exit the parking lot in a wheelchair, but hasn’t yet mentioned whether he was bald, which is what everyone wants to know. You can get a closer look at imgur.

View more fun pics over at our NeatoPicto Blog

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Interplanetary Unusual Attacking Team

When Guardians of the Galaxy was translated into Chinese, they cut some corners. The title of the movie shown in China is now Interplanetary Unusual Attacking Team. The insults have been changed to endearments, and other lines just make no sense at all. Some examples:

  • Each time a character was meant to insult Rocket by calling him “rodent” or “weasel” it was translated into “small raccoon,” a term of endearment.
  • When Gamora says, “Your ship is filthy,” and Star-Lord responds “She has no idea,” the translation came out to “Your ship stinks” and “No culture is terrible.”
  • Star-Lord calling Ronan “turd blossom” translated to “big face.”
  • Gamora’s “I will not succumb to your pelvic sorcery!” became “I will not succumb to your rhetoric sorcery!”

There’s more at The Mary Sue, and even more criticism of the translation if you can read Chinese.


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Misconceptions You Learned in School

(YouTube link)

Mental_floss has launched yet another weekly video series, this one called Misconceptions. It’s about things that need to be put straight. In the inaugural episode, host Eliot Morgan goes over some things you may have learned in school that simply aren’t so. Most of these things were never addressed at my school at all. If you like it, watch for a new episode every Friday. -via mental_floss


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Hearse Chases Car Stolen During Funeral

Westhaven Funeral Home employees had just taken the deceased inside the St. Thomas Missionary Baptist Church near Jackson, Mississippi, for the funeral Thursday morning when a funeral director’s car was stolen from the church parking lot.  

"Once the funeral director went inside with the body to set up, he jumped in the car and took off," said Nathaniel Ford of Westhaven Funeral Home.

Westhaven officials, gave chase to their stolen car,

"High speed chase, 100 miles and hour," said Ford. "Our funeral directors jumped in the hearse, and tried to catch him and he was driving 90 miles and hour and the car went off and left him. Then Sheriff's department got in pursuit."

After a high-speed chase down I-20 into Jackson, the car was abandoned, and the car thief fled on foot. Devarous White was arrested later. Investigators say White signed the funeral registry before the car chase, which will be used as evidence against him.  -via Fark 

(Image credit: WLBT)


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The London Beer Flood of 1814

It was 200 years ago today that a neighborhood in London, England, was flooded by beer. The Meux and Company Brewery had several large brewing vats on the roof. The largest was a 22-foot-high vat to brew porter. It held 511,920 liters of beer, or enough to fill 20,000 barrels. On October 17, 1814, after fermenting for months, one of the metal hoops holding the porter vat together gave way, and the beer exploded out, causing the surrounding vats to fail as well.

A total of 1,224,000 litres of beer under pressure smashed through the twenty-five foot high brick wall of the building, and gushed out into the surrounding area - the slum of St Giles. Many people lived in crowded conditions here, and some were caught by the waves of beer completely unaware. The torrent flooded through houses, demolishing two in its wake, and the nearby Tavistock Arms pub in Great Russell Street suffered too, its 14-year-old barmaid Eleanor Cooper buried under the rubble. The Times reported on 19 October of the flood:

    The bursting of the brew-house walls, and the fall of heavy timber, materially contributed to aggravate the mischief, by forcing the roofs and walls of the adjoining houses.

Fearful that all the beer should go to waste, though, hundreds of people ran outside carrying pots, pans, and kettles to scoop it up - while some simply stooped low and lapped at the liquid washing through the streets. However, the tide was too strong for many, and as injured people began arriving at the nearby Middlesex Hospital there was almost a riot as other patients demanded to know why they weren't being supplied with beer too - they could smell it on the flood survivors, and were insistent that they were missing out on a party! Calm was quickly restored at the hospital, but out in the streets was a different matter.

At least eight people died from the flood: some drowned, other died of injuries, and one supposedly died several days later of alcohol poisoning, although that story may be apocryphal. Read the rest of the story at h2g2. -via Fark


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Frankenstein Pumpkins

Tony Dighera of Cinagro Farms devoted four years to perfecting his crop of Frankenstein pumpkins. They’re not cobbled together from different individuals like Frankenstein’s monster, but pumpkins grown in molds that have the shape of the monster’s head. Now that’s a fancy jack-o-lantern right there! This year, Dighera brought in a crop of 5500 pumpkins, and sold every one of them at $75 each. Next year, there will be a bigger crop, plus white pumpkins shaped like skulls. Yeah, you’ve seen molded fruit before, but I can tell you from experience, it’s not easy to get them to come out consistently right. See more pictures at Geekologie.

Love Halloween and cosplay? Check out our Halloween Blog!

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Drunk J. Crew

Have you ever noticed that the models in the J. Crew catalog look drunk? I haven’t either, as I don’t shop for clothing until I have no choice. But someone noticed, and with a few captions that had to come from first-hand experience, created the blog Drunk J. Crew. The blog is only a couple of days old, but I can see it growing because there’s got to be a lot of raw material available. -via Uproxx


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Igor’s Vacation Home

(YouTube link)

Kai Halvorsen loves his dog Igor. But when the family planned a trip to Thailand, they couldn’t take Igor along. He had to stay in a kennel. Kai decided he had to do something to make Igor’s time there a little better, since the dog had never been away from the home or the family overnight. You’ll love what they came up with… I sure did. It wouldn’t have happened if the stunt weren’t sponsored by a paint and tool company, which resulted in a great ad, but it’s an adorable idea for a much loved pet. -via Tastefully Offensive

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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