Miss Cellania's Liked Blog Posts

Ten Years of None Pizza with Left Beef

It's been ten years now since Steve Molaro tried the Great Pizza Orientation Test. We covered it on Neatorama, just like every other existing website at the time. When Dominoes began online ordering, you could specify topping on the left half or right half, so he tested the limits of the system and ended up with the famous "None Pizza with Left Beef," no cheese, no sauce, and beef on one side. The pizza became an amusingly sad icon of our modern automated world.

In the near-future, there will be no human interaction necessary when purchasing assembly-line food like Domino’s. There may not be any humans involved at all. “Someday,” Molaro writes, the silently judgmental delivery man “will be a robot with a bad mustache and my life will be perfect.” That reality is closer than you think. At the end of August, Ford announced it was partnering with Domino’s to test pizza delivery in self-driving cars, with customers unlocking warming containers in the vehicle using unique codes.

The good news is that this automation allows for creative freedom unrestrained by social custom. The bad news is, well, creative freedom unrestrained by social custom. Robots don’t judge, or caution, you; they give you the pizza you ask for, even if what you ask for is not, technically, pizza. The man who earlier this year ordered a cheeseburger with no onion, ketchup, mustard, pickles, bun, or beef patty from a McDonald’s automated kiosk — and received, naturally, a single slice of cheese — is a spiritual heir to Molaro, and his “cheeseburger” is the more refined child of None Pizza With Left Beef.

That still beats the person who ordered a burger with no everything, received nothing, but was still charged 99 cents. An article at New York magazine looks at Molaro's experiment, it's influence, and the state of automated food ordering ten years later.

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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The Quest to End Aging

If you could decide how long you want to live, how would you answer? The longer your life is, the more likely you will spend the later years in illness and disability. Would it be worth it to add years on the end, or could we stop the effects of aging and stay young and healthy? This is a two-part video; the first part by Kurzgesagt, the second by C.G.P. Grey, although they could easily work as two videos by two different video producers on two different subjects. 

(YouTube link)

The idea of living a lot longer than we do now opens up some philosophical questions. Would longer lives make us wiser, better community members, or encourage us to take better care of our planet? Or would it lead us to take time for granted? C.G.P. Grey looks at death and the meaning of life.

(YouTube link)

So what if we could conquer death? would the benefits outweigh the possible consequences? -via Laughing Squid


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My Sweet Jax

Musician and comedian Erik Helwig (Hot Dad) performs a touching tribute to his beloved cat Jax. First you think, this is silly. It doesn't even rhyme. Then you think, this is a pretty catchy tune. But before you know it, you think, aww, I know how you feel, cats will do that to you.

(YouTube link)

Over the course of the song you get to know Jax, a cat you've never met. You just might get a little teary. -via Tastefully Offensive

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder

We all have different opinions of human appearance that we are attracted to, and it's a good thing, because humans come in all shapes, sizes, and configurations. It's too bad that some folks, meaning those who have a stake in the results, want to push their particular opinions about attractiveness on everyone. The truth is that appearances are only for initial attraction. Afterward, you have to have something else to back it up. Remember, one of these days you'll have both failing looks and failing eyesight, but you'll still appreciate having a companion who thinks you're the bee's knees. You have to wonder what the King ever saw in the Evil Queen besides what the mirror reflected. If he was hoping to find a good stepmother for Snow White, he failed miserably. However, Suzy and the Magic Mirror might make great lifetime companions. This comic is from John McNamee at Pie Comic.


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6 Utterly Terrifying Unsolved Mysteries No One Can Explain

If you liked reading the roundup of true Halloween horror stories, now you have more true crimes to haunt your dreams. Cracked has a list of strange cases that may be murder or something else entirely, but no one has them figured out yet. In 1986, a truck driver and his wife crashed a load of 5,000 gallons of sulfuric acid while speeding down a mountain in Spain. When the bodies were identified, the truck driver's parents were notified. They asked if their grandson was okay.  

It turned out the couple had a 10-year-old son, Juan Pedro Martinez Gomez, who was seen having breakfast with them that very morning. That at least explained the children's clothes, toys, and cassette tapes the authorities had found in the truck, but there was an even bigger problem now: There was no child.

We know what you're thinking. Since there were 5,000 gallons of sulfuric acid involved, maybe the poor kid got dissolved into nothingness? That's what investigators initially thought, but experts determined that this scenario was impossible. At the very least, some bones would have been left behind. So what happened to Juan Pedro? Also, what would compel his father to drive down a steep mountain pass at such a high speed? Hint: It rhymes with "brugs."

The story is more involved, but the child was never found. If he survived the incidennt, he'd be in his 40s now. And that's just one of six cases that get weirder as they go, at Cracked. 


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Deadly Florida

The following is an article from Uncle John's Bathroom Reader The World's Gone Crazy.

(Image credit: Flickr user Dave)

Good thing it’s pretty in the Sunshine State. At least the view will be nice as you try to outrun all of these dangerous things.

AFRAID OF LIGHTNING?

(Image credit: Flickr user NASA HQ PHOTO)

Then don’t go to Florida. A study conducted from 2004 to 2007 by the American Meteorological Society found that people are more likely to get struck by lightning in Florida than anywhere else in North America. The state averages 35 lightning injuries and seven fatalities per year, and “Lightning Alley,” a hot spot that spans central Florida from Tampa to Titusville, receives an average of 50 strikes per square mile per year. And right in the middle of Lightning Alley: Disney World. Even with lightning rods strategically placed throughout the park, a quick-moving storm in 2003 caught animal handlers by surprise at Disney’s Kilimanjaro Safaris attraction. Before they could move the animals to safety, a lightning bolt killed a 12-foot-tall giraffe named Betsy. Also located in Lightning Alley: Universal Studios, SeaWorld, Daytona Beach, and NASA’s Kennedy Space Center, where they launch spaceships.

AFRAID OF ALLIGATORS?

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A Catfishing Story With a Happy Ending

Emma Perrier was a 34-year-old French woman living in London who had just broken up with a boyfriend. She went online to meet someone new, and she did. She connected with an Italian man living in England named Ronaldo “Ronnie” Scicluna. Above you see their profile pics. But Ronnie was actually 53-year-old Alan Stanley, who didn't really want to date, but liked meeting women online. His dating profile, and the things he told Perrier, were a complete fraud. Of course, she eventually found out, since he never wanted to meet in real life, even though he didn't live that far away. But who was the man in the profile picture? Perrier used a reverse image search.

“Believe me I was scared to use it for the first time,” Emma said. She uploaded the photograph of Ronnie wearing his leather jacket. The results arrived in seconds: The man in the photographs was a model and actor from Turkey, called Adem Guzel. Emma was confused. She found his model-management website, an official Twitter account, and his Facebook. Adem’s closest connection to the United Kingdom was that he had studied at the Gaiety School of Acting in the nearby Republic of Ireland.

Perrier sent a message to Guzel, warning him that a man was using his publicity shots in a catfishing scheme. Guzel, who was then 35 and managing a hotel after a TV gig fell apart, returned her message. And that's where the story really takes off. The two are now living together in London. You can read the entire story at the Atlantic. -via Uproxx


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The Whale's Halloween Costume

Webcomic artist Liz Climo always has a great time dressing up her animal characters for Halloween. I think the whale's idea is pretty clever, even if he does have to explain it. I love the banana porpoise and Superotter, too. Then there's Batman and his psychic, and the witch and her cat. Be sure to check back for more critters getting ready for Halloween at Hi, I'm Liz.

Love Halloween and cosplay? Check out our Halloween Blog!

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The Year of the Witch

The Salem Witch Trials get all the publicity, but it was far from the only witch panic that invaded colonial America. In Hartford, Connecticut, witch hysteria gripped the community in 1662 and 1663, so much that it came to be known as "The Year of the Witch." It all started with the death of eight-year-old Elizabeth Kelly, who died of an unknown ailment. Suspicion instantly led to Judith Ayres, who nobody liked anyway. She was arrested for witchcraft, and for good measure, they arrested her husband, too.

Judith and William were subjected to that indispensable part of any good witch trial: the "water test." The couple were bound hand to foot and tossed into a pond. If they floated, that was proof positive they were witches. If they sank, well, at least Judith and William would have the satisfaction of knowing that they would die vindicated.

To no one's real surprise, the pair floated like a pair of corks. A ghastly death at the gallows awaited them.

Luckily for the Ayerses, there were a few people in town who had not come down with the prevailing hysteria. These supporters managed to arrange a jailbreak, and the couple fled to Rhode Island, leaving behind their two sons, ages five and eight. One wonders what sort of lives those boys went on to have.

Unfortunately, the departure of Judith and William did not signal the end of the Hartford witch panic. In truth, it was just getting started.

The young girls of Hartford started talking about witchcraft, and accusing others of the practice. One suspect named an entire coven, including her own husband. Read the account of the Year of the Witch at Strange Company.

Love Halloween and cosplay? Check out our Halloween Blog!

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Why Brush Your Teeth When You Could Be Petting the Cat?

Markus Klemelä just wanted to brush his teeth. His cat wants some lovin'. The cat, like all house cats, doesn't recognize boundaries when he wants something, so Markus could only do one thing -grab his phone to record this interlude.

(YouTube link)

The cat is pretty insistent, and has a world-class purr machine. -via Digg

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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Bullying Jr.

Burger King released a video about bullying. They staged a scene of high school students bullying a kid in the dining area, and the also "bullied" their Whopper Jr. burgers. That's the goofy part. They compare how many people complained about the burger to how many people stood up for the kid. As you can guess, more people were concerned about the burger. After all, they paid for that.  

(YouTube link)

It's the later part of the video that gets you, when people are shown intervening in the teenager's abuse. That might trigger you. You can say that sticking your nose into the situation won't help, and might even make the bullying worse at a different location. But a lot of folks in the reddit comments recalled being bullied as a child, and their clearest memories were of that one time someone stood up for them and let them know they weren't alone. The ad directs you to the No Bully site.


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What Does the Hamburger Helper’s Skeleton Look Like?

The Hamburger Helper mascot is a disembodied hand, wearing a glove, with a face in its palm. It's ridiculous already, but trying to envision what kind of bone structure it has inside is even weirder. That's the question michael SCAREa‏ posed on Twitter. He got over 500 replies, including plenty of illustrations of the inside of a fictional advertising character.

You can see quite a few of the silliest ideas collected at Nerdist.  -via Metafilter


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Roy G. Biv

(Image credit: Miss Cellania)

Roy G. Biv is a mnemonic used to remember the colors of the visible spectrum: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, and violet. Let's learn something about all the colors.

THE TRUE RED BARON

How the Danish protest pig got its stripe.

(Image credit: Axel Krampe)

In the 19th century, Denmark and Germany went to war over a slice of the southern Jutland Peninsula (today called Schleswig-Holstein). Denmark claimed the land in 1848, but 16 years later, Germany regained the territory and promptly barred any Danes who lived there from raising their country’s flag. So, crafty Danish farmers started raising pigs. Through crossbreeding, they created a pig that resembled the Danish flag, featuring red fur and a prominent white belt. By the 20th century, the Protestschwein, or “protest pigs,” had become a snorting symbol of Danish cultural independence.

WHAT CAME FIRST: ORANGE THE FRUIT OR ORANGE THE COLOR?

The fruit! Medieval English speakers rarely encountered the color orange in nature- so they simply called the shade geoluhread (yellow-red). The fruit, imported from northern India to Europe in the 11th century, changed that. Called orenge by medieval Latin speakers, the fruit took over geoluhread’s place in English in the 1530s.

THE YELLOW INDEX

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Searching for the Identity of San Francisco’s Mysterious Mummified Girl

We've read about how San Francisco city officials had all the city's dead moved to Colma in 1914 in order to reclaim the valuable land taken up by cemeteries. As methodical as they were, the project was massive, and mistakes were bound to be made. One was unearthed in May of 2016, when a construction crew dug up a small coffin under Ericka Karner's garage. The sealed coffin had two windows showing the corpse in good condition. There was no identifying information attached. The nonprofit Garden of Innocence organization built a new coffin and provided a burial for the child. But who was she? Her gravestone called her Miranda Eve.

That name was meant to be temporary, given to the dead girl by Karner’s own two young daughters, to be replaced when Miranda’s identity was finally discovered. See, before her second burial, researchers extracted DNA from the corpse, first to make sure that there was no foul play, then for clues.

The samples suggested Miranda had been weaned from breast milk a year before her death, putting her age between two and three-and-a-half years old when she died. They also hinted at a diet change that took place a few months before death, which suggested she died from a longer illness, not trauma. An analysis of her hair concluded she died of marasmus, or severe malnutrition, likely due to an infection.

Other information from the DNA, plus a painstaking search of city records finally yielded results. Read her story at Atlas Obscura.

(Image credit: Garden of Innocence)


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Buddhist Monks with a Sense of Humor

While they may have given up certain earthly pleasures, like hair, these monks aren't above a bit of shenanigans when they need a bag to carry their stuff. Wouldn't you do the same in their position? Since the band Nirvana and the accompanying symbol were around before these monks were born, there's little chance that they aren't familiar with it. After all, Buddhists seek Nirvana. -via reddit

View more fun pics over at our NeatoPicto Blog

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Baby Hears Mommy for the First Time

Christy Keane's daughter Charly was born deaf. She's still an infant, but recently got hearing aids. We've seen older children and adults get emotional when they hear sound for the first time, but Charly is so young, she doesn't understand what's happening or how to react. Her facial expressions are precious.

(YouTube link)

She's instantly delighted, then confused, then a little scared, then delighted again. She never takes her eyes off her Mommy, though, so you know she's going be alright. You can see more of Charly at Instagram. -via Digg

See more about baby and kids at NeatoBambino

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10 Things You Didn’t Know about Time Bandits

The 1981 movie Time Bandits was written, produced, and directed by Monty Python's Terry Gilliam. Unlike his later fantasies Brazil and The Adventures of Baron Munchausen, this film was aimed at children, and those who were kids in the 1980s remember the utterly wacky Time Bandits fondly.

10. The script somehow ended up in Sean Connery’s hands and he was interested.

Connery wasn’t even thought of for the script aside from the fact that the part of Agammemnon need to be played by ‘someone looking like Sean Connery’. It was kind of a happy accident that he said yes.

9. The director accidentally jumped off a scaffolding and landed on Shelly Duvall.

To be fair he was trying to show his actors what not to do while hitting their mark, he just wasn’t entirely successful in his direction.

If the movie was a part of your childhood, and even if it wasn't, you'll want to learn more about the making of Time Bandits at TVOM.


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Wikipedia Markov Masher

The Wikipedia Markov Masher is a generator that will mix two Wikipedia articles together into a paragraph that almost, but not quite, makes sense in an artificial intelligence manner. I entered Crystal Head Vodka and Memento mori and got this.

Memento mori rings were formerly an accurate historical records advice for the famous danse macabre is quadruple-distilled and artist John Alexander first conceived of the time after morning, the most likely related to 40% alcohol by volume. Unlike Crystal Head launched in 2008 and founded by the impermanence of memento mori Sic transit gloria mundi Ubi sunt You Only Live Once (disambiguation) Tempus fugit Memento mori are typical of the phrase is the bottle is "about nothing else but written as a sealed chamber and Momijigari, the Crystal Skull Vodka". Neatorama.com. Retrieved February 20, 2014.

That's right, you only live once. Combining pop culture genres can be fun.

Gandalf hid Luke and uses the 100 Videogames Villains". In Ukraine, was accomplished both turned to write, as leader of the River Anduin—and a more than Gandalf impressed on exploring the name and gives him a diagnosis. He appears as a Jedi, the Bridge of Middle-earth, "set against Sauron's forces of their Order, was already set Gandalf is trademarked in the fire that Vader asks about the production The Lord of his own birth name is said that Luke escapes with the same name "Gandolf" occurs as Anakin's scarred face. Ahsoka's presence was not require the Academy Award for borderline personality disorder to voice of Sauron, however, had the Ring, Gandalf was substantially increased in winter, they take the 1940s and that underlies the peak of Aragorn.

See more funny examples at Metafilter.

(Image credit: Flickr user cookiespi)


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Twerking Corgi Latte

Daphne Tang (periperipeng) is a 17-year-old 3D latte artist who creates extraordinary cups of coffee with adorable animals on top! Her materials are creamy foam (or is that foamy cream?), chocolate syrup, and food coloring. The cutest example is this corgi who is lighter than air and willing to dance for you.

Posted this on my story and it was highly requested to be put on my main so here you go!

A post shared by DAPHNE TAN (@periperipeng) on Oct 6, 2017 at 2:54am PDT

(Instagram link)

Tan has all kinds of latte animals at her website and on her Instagram page. -via Laughing Squid


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Full-Size Candy Bars

Trick-or-treating as a kid in a small town, I always knew which houses were going to give out the full-size candy bars. I also knew which houses had homemade popcorn balls, peanut-butter fudge, and cookies. One old lady would invite us inside to select our treat from a huge table of candy she made. No one gives out homemade treats anymore, due to the fear of being accused of tampering. But does anyone give out full-size candy bars at Halloween now? Since candy manufacturers started offering "fun size" candies, that's what kids get. I don't even hand out chocolate. For one thing, chocolate is too tempting to save for Halloween. For another thing, I figured every parent is going to confiscate the chocolate from their kids' treat bags, just like I did. This is the latest comic from Chris Hallbeck at Maximumble.

Love Halloween and cosplay? Check out our Halloween Blog!

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Friendly Ferret Fight

Just like two young brothers do, the ferrets Atlas and Orion squabble over their water dish. We know it's just a sibling rivalry, as neither one of them were hurt.  

(YouTube link)

First they chase and slap each other, then one tries to drown the other in the bowl. Then they wrestle for a while. Who won? If you ask the ferrets, they would probably both claim victory. Just like brothers. -via Tastefully Offensive

Love cute animals? View more at Lifestyles of the Cute and Cuddly blog

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No Spiders in Here



David Orr made this apple pie for a local competition. He spelled out "No Spiders in Here" with the top crust. Would you trust this pie? Admit it, you hadn't thought about the possibility of spiders in the pie until you got the assurance of their absence. It's like trying not to think about an elephant.

Orr's pie won second place in the appearance category. We don't know if this was the one that beat it.

While this is a clever idea for the Halloween season, I want to do it for Thanksgiving or Christmas, when no one would be expecting it. -via Boing Boing

We dish up more neat food posts at the Neatolicious blog

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When Homework Goes Wrong

A fifth grade class is studying World War II. One homework assignment was to define some of the terms they learned in class. This student, a cousin of redditor LeBronJameson, used Google Search to come up with the answers. Sometimes that helps; sometimes you get busted, especially if you didn't pay attention at all in the classroom. I hope he/she learned to double check and maybe get a second source. -via reddit
 

See more about baby and kids at NeatoBambino

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Why California's Musical Road Sounds Terrible

We had a video last year about New Mexico's musical road that plays "America the Beautiful." It sounds really nice. California tried the same stunt with "The William Tell Overture," but it didn't quite turn as as well. Tom Scott took a road trip to Lancaster to explain why.

(YouTube link)

Yeah, that sounds pretty bad, and the story of how it happened is even worse. -via Tastefully Offensive


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Astronomers Observe Collision of Neutron Stars

Astronomers announced today that they have detected a spark that was produced when two neutron stars collided. The spark plus the gravitational waves produced by the collision are evidence of a massive explosion. The gravitational wave evidence of such collisions (possibly by black holes colliding) has been observed before, but the event detected on August 17th of this year was the first time such an event was accompanied by a flash, which indicates it was caused by neutron stars instead of black holes. The event is called GW170817 after the date, but is described as "a Rosetta stone for astronomy."  

Scientists announced Monday they have observed gravitational waves for the fifth time—and they’ve seen the light from the cosmic crash that produced them. The waves came from the collision of two neutron stars in a galaxy called NGC 4993, located about 130 million light-years from Earth.

Neutron stars are strange, mysterious objects, the collapsed cores of stars that exploded in spectacular fashion—supernovae—and died. These stars measure about the size of a metropolitan city, but have about the same mass as our sun. Astronomers had long predicted that when two neutron stars collide, the resulting explosion would produce electromagnetic radiation, in the form of optical light. The afterglow would shine bright enough to be seen through powerful telescopes, the first visible proof of a source of gravitational waves, provided the latter could also be detected.

The resulting explosion is called a "kilonova," which is 1,000 times brighter than a supernova. Physicists believe such collisions are what produced some of the heavier elements of the universe, like gold. Read more about the kilonova at the Atlantic.

You can watch a video about the discovery here.


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Wizard of Oz Homecoming Assembly

Walden Grove High School in Sahuarita, Arizona, had a pep rally to gear students up for homecoming. The school's dance team did a great routine with a Wizard of Oz theme.

(YouTube link)

Sure, it's a cheesy idea you'd expect from a high school choreographer, but these kids display some seriously fancy footwork to some truly clever song selections. This may put a smile in your Monday. -via Boing Boing


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I Disagree With Your Rant

Ah, life inside the bubble, where the world is divided into two distinct groups: those with agree with us, and those who don't. The internet was supposed to open up the world to global communication, a sharing of ideas. But it also allowed us to limit our communications to like-minded individuals and organizations, because no matter how obscure those beliefs are, you'll find someone on the internet to validate them. So how can we handle those with opposing views?

1. Ignore them. That's what the bubble is for, so you can stay safe inside it and have your beliefs reinforced instead of challenged.
2. Convince yourself your opponents are mentally or psychologically impaired, like this guy.
3. Argue with them. It's not going to change minds, but that's what a lot of folks do.
4. Tell yourself that all viewpoints are equally valid. They are not.
5. Remember the Serenity Prayer.

This is the latest comic from Zach Weinersmith at Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal.


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Charles Laughton in The Hunchback of Notre Dame

Neatorama presents a guest post from actor, comedian, and voiceover artist Eddie Deezen. Visit Eddie at his website or at Facebook.

The first mention of a sound film version of victor Hugo's classic novel The Hunchback of Notre Dame can be traced back to a 1932 news item in the Hollywood reporter, stating that John Huston was writing a treatment of the story for the screen, to star Boris Karloff. MGM executive Irving Thalberg first presented the idea to Charles Laughton in 1934. In 1937, MGM considered making the film with Peter Lorre in the title role. RKO studios made the final decision to make the film in 1939.

Many actors were considered to play the role of Quasimodo, including Bela Lugosi, Robert Morely, and Lon Chaney Jr. Even Orson Welles's name was in the mix, and Welles came close, almost making his film debut as the hunchback instead of as Charles Foster Kane in Citizen Kane two years later.

It was thought that Charles Laughton, who was in trouble with the IRS at the time, may have been in too much hot water in America, and would be unavailable to play Quasimodo. RKO promised Lon Chaney Jr. that if Laughton was unable to handle the IRS and his financial fiasco, he would get the role. But Laughton finally settled his differences with the Internal Revenue Service and officially signed on to play the Paris bellringer. Laughton had recently signed a contract with RKO and chose this project to be his first film there.

Laughton, having performed with her in London, requested the beautiful Maureen O'Hara to play his unrequited love, the gypsy Esmeralda in the film, and the studio agreed. Sir Cedric Hardwicke signed on to play the oh-so-evil villain, Frollo, and Edmond O'Brien was inked to play Esmeralda's lover, Gringore. William Dieterle took over the helm as director.

Laughton also recommended Perc Westmore to be his make-up man. Ironically, although he was personally chosen by Laughton, he and Laughton were to butt heads many times in disagreement over how Quasimodo should be costumed and made up.

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I Accidentally Became Famous In Another Country

A few years ago, Buzzfeed senior editor Erin Chack pulled an idea out of thin air and wrote a post about Malta. It went viral, and she explains how that can make your life really weird for a while. But she eventually visited the country and had an adventure she never anticipated. This post contains NSFW language.

(YouTube link)

I know what it's like to be desperate for a post idea. Now I think about all those times I wrote about chicken breeds or historical murders, when I should have been writing about a lovely nation that's underrepresented in US media. Lesson learned. -via Metafilter


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Sci-Fi Universe Logic That Falls Apart In Three Steps

Rules, laws, and logic help us set up a science fiction universe so that we can understand the story we're about to hear. But following the rules isn't very exciting, and you need excitement for people to want to see your show. And logic can be the enemy of creative storytelling. You can see how this works in the Star Trek image. We take the breaking of the Prime Directive for granted, even though we joke about it, because Star Trek would be boring if the Enterprise crew just wandered the universe observing alien civilizations like they are supposed to. Other examples just show a lack of thought. 



There are 15 examples of how the science fiction we watch doesn't stop to consider logic at Cracked.


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