And get your house egged. Yay! Will those anti-gluten/-peanuts/-any nuts/etc parents come by and clean it up, I wonder?

Smoking in restaurants, yes! Let's allow smoking back into work places as well! So non-smokers have to sit enveloped by tobacco smoke every work day for the rest of their lives, that's totally the same thing.... Halloween is ONE day out of the year. And it's YOUR job as a parent to explain to YOUR child why he/she may not be able to eat all the types of candy. And you could always graciously accept what your kind neighbors are handing out—and then switch it out, what your kid can't have, when you get home, can't you? Everyone on your side of the argument makes it sound like people (again, graciously) handing out the "wrong" candy is this big TRAGEDY. Please.

It's your job to work around it. You can't expect other people to spend time thinking HARD about these things—when they don't have that problem in their lives. It's a lot to ask; people just go to the freaking store and get some candy. Especially people who aren't parents (and who don't read up on the latest child care trends, obviously). I was visiting a friend at their summer house, we were hanging out, I was applying some nail polish—and she asked me to leave the room. I was all "Huh?". Apparently it's a "thing" now that you have to get special childsafe nail polishes for your snowflake—and they can get cancer or brain damage or something for inhaling some regular nail polish? How the F was I supposed to know about this? It's not my field to consider these things, is it? To seek this information out? Come on. I was all "Are you serious?" ( had NEVER heard about this, that it was a 'thing'. And she acted like I was trying to kill her kid—on purpose. This is why you can't see your friends for 10 years after they've had kids...

Not only was she breaking every rule of polite society bitching about a treat that is offered to her by a kind stranger. (I mean, really?). But, ALSO—even as a young child I had had learned/been taught, that it's NOT OK to dig around and cherrypick what you want out of a bowl like she did! I knew that at, what, seven? Horrible, horrible woman. I'm convinced this is a new thing. I did not see ANY of this behavior growing up (in the 70's). They're raising little monsters.

This father wins. Kudos to his parents for raising a sensible human being.

There were no anti-bacterial nothin' then... Kids have NO immune system now due to their clinical environment. The kids with the least amount of allergies? Children who grow up on a farm with barnyard animals! This per a German medical study, i.e. totally trustworthy. (They don't play.) Go figure, huh? It confirmed what I always thought anyway. I grew up riding horses—and why yes, I did my fair share of mucking stalls. And not a single allergy. I was never sick either basically, not compared to my classmates. (Actually, I wanted to get sick! Get chickenpox and mumps and whatever the hell everyone got, so I'd get to stay home and eat icecream... Gawd.)

Parents these days are working this antibacterial thing SO hard and OH-so wrong. Even if they don't think... Don't they read?? If you never encounter a bacterium, and suddenly you do, how do you defend yourself against that? You don't. HOW do they not get this? I was shocked when I visited this mom acquaintance of mine—someone really, really cool!—and she asked me to wash my hands before I said hello to her 1.5-year-old... I was absolutely STUNNED. But apparently this is a "thing" now, according to people I've told this story to. I guess it's such an established thing now that moms don't even feel awkward about asking people to WASH before touching their child. Jesus Christ on a CRACKER. And this woman is European, what? I can't even.

Forget standing close to the hole in the ice, that ice looks pretty dangerous overall! That's all I could think about.

See, child labor is illegal in the US. Especially at age six.

There's no way it's not genuinely who he is.