-_-

Wow, I could never be on a call center staff.

'Yes sir, please eat that turkey you cleaned with bleach and call back to tell us how good it was. Hold on, was that Clorox bleach? Oh ok, very good, we're not sure about any other manufacturer or generic brand.'

'No ma'am don't put that turkey in the fish aquarium but give it to the kids to use as a raft in the bathtub. Remove only when the kids or turkey begins to prune.'

'Please put down the chainsaw, discard of the turkey and drive down to the corner store to purchase a frozen turkey dinner. Wait, wait...my supervisor doesn't want you driving or using a microwave. Please go to a safe place and lie down until Thanksgiving is over.'

Not 'til they pry my mouse out of my cold, dead hands!

haha

"Trick or treat shouldn't go both ways!"

Brainier Than The Average Bear / Natural / XXL

@nutbastard

Damn son, I'd swear I wrote your comment. We'll have to grab a beer sometime.

@ Will L

Excellent points, the one thing to point out is the use of some green and especially clear bottles (Ballantine in green and Corona in clear) can't filter out sunlight like a brown bottle. This causes that 'skunky' smell and flavor (see also Heineken, Carib, any import in a non-brown bottle). So what is potentially a good beer off a draft is ruined by the bottle, besides Corona...that swill isn't good coming from anywhere.

Also I've had Coors in Golden, Co right off that tap and it tastes fine (for macro rice beer). Then I'll try it out of a can from the store and I can't stomach one swallow.

Drink $1 cans of PBR or $20 bottles of Belgium Tripel...just as long as you enjoy it and it tastes good to you.

SQUEAK! SQUEAK SQUEAK! SQUEAK!!! sigh, I figured Chad would be able hear me.

Brainier Than The Average Bear/Ash/2XL

No big deal...grow up in NC calling it a liquor-cycle (pronounced liquor-sicle like popsicle).

Had a couple locals that never had a valid license and rode their 'sicles' to the store for some more alcohol.

Another one and it says 'I'll send an SOS to the world...I hope that someone gets my...I hope that someone gets my...I hope that someone gets my...Message in a bot...' Sting!

Brainier Than The Average Bear/2XL/Natural

CORRECTION - Hum...humhum...Meet George Jetson...his boy Elroy.

Hum...humhum...Meet the George Jetson...his boy Elroy.

Brainier Than The Average Bear 2XL Natural

"I told you it was plastic, now where's that lying goldfish?"

Brainier Than The Average Bear 2XL Natural

What is most pathetic is that the protesters and some of those that commented feel such a bond/identify with a corporation (in this case a big box store). And that when it 'betrays' you for taking a political stance, it makes you shun it and pout like spoiled child.

Target doesn't represent anything. It's not anti-Walmart...shopping there doesn't defeat the Republicans. It's a damn corporation like so many others that only exist to make money. Eating Archer Farms or wearing a brand off their racks isn't going to save the world from tyranny.

-_-

"Roughly translated: Turn around/but don't shout/there's a big mummy/with one eye poked out/Burma Shave"

Brainier Than The Average Bear/XXL/Natural

If Homer Simpson or Peter Griffen,

'so you're charged me $1000 bucks and where's the cheesburger?'

'What?!'

'So no cheeseburger, what about the pickle?'

'...'

Amendment to the hypothesis:

But the manner is likewise proportional to the person to which the email is addressed.

If Joe Everyman sends that email to management, it would look like the first example. However, and this applies to all mentioned except the CEO, when sending emails to other cohorts of the same level, the last example applies. Joe only needs to impress the power above him and not someone who can't promote him. Also known as the Kiss-ass Postulate.

Just an idea but shouldn't the bones be shaped into the greatest threat to humans: humans!

I guess bones arranged as a skeleton would be dull and I dare say done to death.