Dear Blockbuster Member,
David Thorne is at it again. The guy who tried to pay a bill with a picture of a spider and suffered through a surprise apartment inspection now has overdue video rentals. The correspondence between Thorne and Blockbuster Video goes about as you’d expect (if you can’t dazzle them with brilliance…), but there is a delicious twist at the end.
Dear Megan,
With the possible exception of Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay, the movies were not worth watching let alone stealing. In Logan’s Run, for example, the computer crashed at the end when presented with conflicting facts and blew up destroying the entire city. When my computer crashes I carry on a little bit and have a cigarette while it is rebooting. I don’t have to search through rubble for my loved ones. The same programmers probably designed the Blockbuster ‘returned or not’ database.
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Bad Fiction Winners 2009
Yes, in the midst of sweet, sunny, sweltering, early-summer days, with the gnats swirling around your head and the bees singing their bzzzzy song, the incomparable results of the annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest have risen from the depths of a writer’s dark and stormy mind to torture readers yet again. And if you think that sentence was bad, you should read this year’s winning entry:
“Folks say that if you listen real close at the height of the full moon, when the wind is blowin’ off Nantucket Sound from the nor’ east and the dogs are howlin’ for no earthly reason, you can hear the awful screams of the crew of the “Ellie May,” a sturdy whaler Captained by John McTavish; for it was on just such a night when the rum was flowin’ and, Davey Jones be damned, big John brought his men on deck for the first of several screaming contests.”
That gem was written by 55-year-old David McKenzie of Federal Way, Washington. Honors also go to runner-up Warren Blair of Ashburn, Virginia and winners in various fiction categories. Link
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The Impeachment and Trial of John F. Kennedy
I’m a big fan of the genre of fiction known as alternate history. That’s why I’m excited about a new novel by Harry Turtledove and Bryce Zabel called Winter of Our Discontent: The Impeachment and Trial of John F. Kennedy.
The point of divergence is that a Secret Service agent spotted the glint off of Oswald’s rifle seconds before he fired. Kennedy survived November 22, 1963. Whether or not he would survive scandals that would rock his administration would not be so certain.
You can read the first chapter of the novel here, and the articles of impeachment here.
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Award Winning Short Film "Shadows"
[YouTube - Link]
Check out this award winning short film (it’s only 3 minutes long). It’s a nice shoutout to the gothic horror films of the 20s and 30s. Simple but effective.
Plot Synopsis:
A leasing agent prepares an apartment with a mysterious past for an
afternoon viewing. While awaiting the arrival of the prospective client
the leasing agent learns that she’s not alone in the apartment.
– via fightingowlfilms
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Heartbroke Daily
The Heartbroke Daily is an online diary of a fictional character, Knox Dupree, who suffers from a chronic ailment: love sickness. In it, Knox tell us an engaging story every day about a different woman who broke his heart:
Dahlia was that girl in the airport terminal who you see out of the corner of your eye and think, She seems really intriguing. I hope I sit next to her. It usually doesn’t happen, so you pop an Ambien and fade yourself out for the duration. However, in this particular instance I wound up sitting in next to the girl from the terminal, thinking to myself, maybe my luck has changed.
I struck up a conversation about nightlife in Tokyo, where we were departing from. This led into a rundown of who we were, and what we did. She worked in advertising, liked it ok, preferred Seattle, where she lived, to Southern California, where she was raised. It was all mundane small talk and I found my infatuation fading, until, two hours into the flight, both engines stopped and the plane fell from the sky like a anvil in an old cartoon.
Link – via The Presurfer
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