Celebrity Muppets
Image: TMZ
TMZ has side-by-side photos of celebrities and the Sesame Street Muppets that they resemble. Queen Elizabeth II, Nick Nolte, Dustin Diamond, and Zach Braff are among the mocked.
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Failed/Cringeworthy Celebrity Music Crossovers
When a celebrity gives up something that he or she gets paid millions to do, in order to pursue what they feel could be their “true” calling, music, most of the population cringes. Digging through these videos was like sitting through a horror movie that I couldn’t keep my eyes off of. Joe Pesci? Kevin Costner? Guaranteed to drop jaws, here are 24 of the celebrities-gone-musicians that are awkwardly amazing in their own right, with video evidence.
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Death Masks of the Famous
Before the age of photography, there was a strange custom of making a plaster cast of the face of the recently departed.
These "death masks" were mementos of the dead, though they also had other purposes like for creating portraits or for recording facial records of unknown corpses.
Here’s a collection of death masks of the famous at Socyberty. To the left is Alfred Hitchcock:
Alfred Hitchcock dealt with death any number of times in his films – murder most horrid quite often – and in his death he retains a certain air of petulance.
He had a career that spanned six decades and most people are surprised to hear that he died as late as 1980. He directed over fifty feature films and is regarded by many as the most influential British film maker of all time.
He died of renal failure in California at the age of eighty. It is somewhat ironic that the film-maker who made generations of moviegoers wet themselves with fright should die of a kidney related illness.
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You Don't Know Jack
Being born a Jill, I always have had an involuntary relationship with the name “Jack.” For a few months in high school, I even dated a Jack. I was thrilled when we broke up because I no longer had to hear the nursery rhyme every day. But what is it about the name that has made it so dominant in our society? Why is it such a popular name?
All this and more can be revealed when you just admit that “you don’t know Jack.”
Image Via Computationally.Irrational [Flickr]
About the Name:
The name Jack came from a Middle English word, “jakke,” used to refer to any male, particularly those of the lower classes. Many people mistakenly believe the name comes from “Jacques,” which came from the names Jacob and James. English speakers associated the name Jack with John much more often than these other names, so the similar sounds are purely coincidental.
In the UK, the name is the most popular name for male babies between 2003 and 2007. In England, it has been the top name since 1994. The name is much less common in America, ranking in the top 30-40 names of male babies, but it is still much more popular than it was around 20 years ago, when it was closer to the 175th ranking.
Phrases:
“Jack of all trades” has been used for centuries and refers to a person who could do a variety of tasks. The use of the word “Jack” was only included because it was still being used as a generic term for ‘man’ at the time. It was not originally a negative expression, but at some point, people started adding on the phrase “master of none,” which made for a whole new meaning. It can now refer to either phrase and, as a result, can be bad or good depending on the context.
Image Via Joel Mark Witt [Flickr]
Because Jack was so often used to refer to social underlings, it was eventually used to refer to useless objects. Eventually, it began being used as a term for very little. The phrase “you don’t know jack” (with or without the expletive) has been used for decades to say someone knows very little. Yes, it seems to be a bit of a double negative, but expressions are commonly created and spread without any consideration for proper grammar.
A Few Facts About A Few Famous Jacks:
Jack Black is the son of two rocket scientists and a college friend of Tim Robbins. He often jokingly refers to Philip Seymour Hoffman as his “nemesis” because the two frequently audition for the same roles.
Jack Nicholson worked as a gofer at Hannah Barbara animation studios when he was young; when they offered him an animation job, he turned them down, saying he wanted to be an actor. Aside from being a good artist, he is also a great singer, as documented by his performance in Tommy. Fortunately, he stuck with acting and is tied with Walter Brennan for the title of male actor with the most Oscar wins.
Source Image ViaMharrsch [Flickr]
Jack Lemmon was not only a great actor, but also a great, self-taught pianist; he wrote the theme for the 1980 movie Tribute. When he first started acting, studio head Jack Warner wanted him to change his name to “Jack Lennon” so critics wouldn’t have the chance to say that his performance in a given film was a lemon. Jack convinced him the name would be compared to Lenin, which was even worse.
Jack Kerouac was born to French-Canadian parents and did not learn English until he was six. He originally started writing On the Road in French and actually has two unpublished novels in the language as well. He was enrolled in the US Merchant Marines during WWII, but was honorably discharged on the grounds of psychiatric issues. At one point, he was arrested for helping a friend, Lucien Carr, hide the evidence after murdering a stalker.
Source Image Via Tompalumbo [Flickr]
Jack products:
The Jack in card decks was originally a knave card. The name wasn’t changed until the mid-nineteenth century, when card manufacturing became a big business and the companies realized having “Kn, Q, K, A” abbreviations were too confusing. They opted for the use of “J” instead. In the UK, they still commonly refer to the “Jack” card as a “Knave.”
Source Image Via Tadson [Flickr]
Jack Daniels opened his distillery in Moore County, Tennessee in 1866. When the state enacted prohibition in 1910, the factory reopened in St. Louis, Missouri and Birmingham, Alabama, but none of the alcohol made in these factories was ever sold due to quality control issues. The Tennessee ban on alcohol wasn’t repealed until 1938, but even today, the county the alcohol is produced is still a dry county.
Jack In The Box started out as a burger joint in San Diego named Topsy’s. The locations all had a circus theme, which is where the Jack In The Box name came from. When the company started losing major market shares in the early 80’s they killed off “Jack” and moved to create more upscale fast food for yuppies. After their e coli scare in the early 90’s though, the company almost went bankrupt, but was saved, largely due to the resurrection of their famed Jack character.
Source Image Via Thomas Hawk [Flickr]
A Few Famous Fictional Jacks:
Jack Skellington, most widely remembered for his lead character in Nightmare Before Christmas, is a reoccurring character in Tim Burton films, appearing in Sleepy Hollow, James and the Giant Peach and Beetlejuice. Although his talking voice is done by Susan Sarandon’s ex-husband, Chris, his singing voice is done by Danny Elfman.
Source Image Via Veronica Bautista [Flickr]
Captain Jack Sparrow was originally supposed to be a much more minor character, who was merely intended to guide Will Turner through the movie. Johnny Depp’s performance was so well received though that the character’s entire role was reprised and he became one of the most adored characters of the movie. In fact, a back story was later created for him and turned into a children’s book series, Pirates of the Caribbean: Jack Sparrow.
Storybook Jacks:
Jack and The Beanstalk is based on an old oral story of Jack the Giant Killer. While many of the tales try to moralize Jack’s behavior, the most popular version leaves Jack as kind of a jerk who robs someone, manipulates his wife and then kills him…all on the grounds that the man is a giant.
Jack Be Nimble was a nursery rhyme that never made sense to me as a child. Interestingly, it seems to be one of the few with a very clear meaning, as jumping over candlesticks was a game and fortune telling method in the mid-nineteenth century. If one could clear the candlestick without putting out the flame, they were said to have good luck coming their way.
Source Image Via ABakedCreation [Flickr]
The famed Jack and Jill rhyme originally was Jack and Gill and there are a variety of stories involving the origins of the song. Also, although we normally only hear the first verse of the song, there are actually four commonly accepted verses. The full rhyme goes:
Jack and Jill went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water.
Jack fell down and broke his crown,
And Jill came tumbling after.
Up Jack got and home did trot
As fast as he could caper;
And went to bed to mend his head
With vinegar and brown paper.Jill came in and she did grin
To see his paper plaster;
Mother vexed did whip her next
For causing Jack’s disaster.Now Jack did laugh and Jill did cry
But her tears did soon abate;
Then Jill did say that they should play
At see-saw across the gate.
Source Image Via gfpeck [Flickr]
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Who’s Getting Roasted?
Celebrity roasts have been a comedy staple for decades. In today’s Lunchtime Quiz at mental_floss, you are challenged to identify who is being skewered by the quips from various roasts. I scored 60%, which is better than I expected. Link
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Celebrity Tattoos
From the title of today’s Lunchtime Quiz at mental_floss, regular Neatorama readers might think you’ll be asked to identify the tattoos of celebrity’s faces people wear to show their fandom. But no, in this quiz you are asked to identify a celebrity from the tattoos they have themselves. I scored 50%, surprisingly because I didn’t even know the celebrities, much less their tattoos! Good luck. Link
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5 Celebrities With Depression
Being a depression sufferer myself, I find it interesting and inspiring to see people deal with their chronic depression. I love seeing what people can do with their lives, despite the agonizing pain they have had to cope with. While we probably all know about Heath Ledger and Kurt Cobain, there are plenty of surprising celebrities with depression, like Harrison Ford. A few others you may not have know about include the five stars below.
Jim Carrey
In an interview during 60 Minutes, Mr. Carrey revealed that the inspiration behind his funny-man antics was “desperation.” Like many famous comics, Carrey channeled his emotional pain and scarring into humor. The laughter and attention brought from audiences helps ease the depression comedians feel and soothes their pain.
Carrey’s attention getting antics started when he tried to entertain his sick mother. To get her spirits up, he’d do anything from impressions to rolling down the stairs. When he was young, he grasped on to an optimistic dream of making it big. In 1987, he wrote himself a check for ten million dollars “for acting services rendered.” As it turns out, the check was a massive underestimate of what he ended up making when he cashed the check 1995. As financial worries lessened, so did his depression symptoms. He has since learned to better cope with his sadness and he says the valleys and peaks have gradually smoothed out a bit. While he used to take Prozac to help stabilize his mood, he now focuses on treatment through spirituality and clean living.
Sources: one, two & three Photo by IBWK [Flickr]
Rodney Dangerfield
“If a really good comedian isn’t depressed,” says Bob Saget, “something’s wrong.” Rodney Dangerfield is no exception to this rule. Around the end of his life, he attended regular therapy sessions with his psychiatrist and took around 137 prescription drugs a day, including anti-depressants and Valium.
Rodney’s father abandoned the family when he was a child and he was instead raised by a cold-hearted mother.
He found an outlet in writing jokes, and even remembers the first one. At age 4, Dangerfield finished dinner and whined, “I’m still hungry.”
“You’ve had sufficient,” replied his mom.
“But,” said Rodney, “I didn’t even have any fish.”
He has had wild mood swings throughout his career and tried to escape the pain and suffering in every way imaginable, including prostitutes and drugs. His wife helped pull him through to the end, but he still experienced these problems until the end of his days.
Source Photo by Breakfast For Dinner [Flickr]
J.K. Rowling
J.K. Rowling will be the first to tell you about the hardships of being a single parent. In fact, in her darkest hour, she strongly contemplated suicide while suffering from a massive bout of depression. She missed her ex-husband and worried about finances, that’s when the dark thoughts started coming out. Fortunately, her daughter was there to inspire her to seek treatment:
“Mid-twenties life circumstances were poor and I really plummeted,” said Rowling. “The thing that made me go for help . . . was probably my daughter. She was something that earthed me, grounded me, and I thought, this isn’t right, this can’t be right, she cannot grow up with me in this state.”
Rowling opted too treat her depression with cognitive therapy rather than anti-depressants. This type of therapy seeks to cure the emotional problem, rather than treating it. The therapy involves a series of counseling sessions providing the sufferer with the mental tools to cope with their emotions. Rowling has been very forthright about her disorder in the hope she can help remove the stigma associated with mental illnesses.
Owen Wilson
Many people already know about Owen Wilson’s depression. After all, his attempted suicide took over all the tabloid headlines at their local grocery stores two years ago. But, you may still be wondering why.
The fact is, like millions of other Americans, Wilson is clinically depressed and will be throughout his lifetime. He has been battling depression by taking anti-depressants for years, however, breaking up with Kate Hudson pushed him beyond the effects of his medication and made him feel hopeless. While it has been debated whether Wilson was taking cocaine or heroin around this time, the fact is that either way, a major life change can dramatically endanger a depression sufferer.
Sources: one & two Photo by Smellmoregloves’ [Flickr]
Brooke Shields
Mrs. Shields is a perfect example of how beauty does not equal happiness. While not a lifelong depression sufferer, she has been very vocal about her experience with postpartum depression, an illness experienced by 13% of pregnant women and new mothers. Her book “Down Came The Rain” describes her experiences in detail.
Like many postpartum depression sufferers, she experienced a detachment from her baby daughter and self-destructive thoughts. At her lowest point, Brooke says she wanted to jump out of a window and throw the baby against a wall. Brooke began taking Paxil to cope with her emotions and eventually recovered. She now has a very close relationship with her daughter.
After being criticized by Tom Cruise for her use of anti-depressants, Brooke published an essay in the “New York Times” detailing the need for global recognition of postpartum depression and the use of anti-depressants for treatment.
Source Photo by WatchWithKristin [Flickr]
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Pam Anderson Totally Looks Like Bride of Chucky
I could waste a lot of time at TotallyLooksLike.com. No, wait, I already have. Some of the comparisons are astute (Billy Mays really does look like Al from Home Improvement!), some of them are funny, and some of them are just plain mean. You can make your own by using their archive of pictures, or upload your own finds. A couple that I thought were funny: Suge Knight totally looks like Uncle Phil from Fresh Prince of Bel Air, Rod Blagojevich totally looks like Lego Man, and Axl Rose totally looks like Pickles.
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Celebrities are Clowns... No, Really
I am horribly, terribly scared of clowns (and people dressed up in costumes or masks that obscure their faces, for that matter), but even I find this contest on Worth 1000 interesting. The contest lets people with wicked Photoshop skills put their techniques to the test with regular challenges. This one is to give the celebrity of their choice a Ringling-style makeover.
The one here is by Worth1000 submitter SassyDeb, and in case the grease paint threw you, it’s Hugh Laurie from House.
Here’s the whole gallery, but you can also find previous incarnations of this particular challenge here.
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