In this kindergarten gymnastics recital, a young boy attempts to clear the vault. He fails. And fails again. But he keeps trying, and eventually breaks into tears. Still not giving up. But he gets an encouraging cheer from his fellow students (“You can do it!”) and that makes all the difference. -via reddit
Tanya Malone, the bride, marched up the aisle with her escort at a church in Lucan, County Dublin, Ireland. Her beautiful gown flowed behind her with a billowing train.
A little boy in attendance understood perfectly why she had chosen that particular gown and acted accordingly.
Thus a new wedding tradition was born.
-via Pleated Jeans
Max’s parents pulled the old bait-and-switch. They told him they were going to a broccoli farm, and at the last minute he found out that the trip was to the circus instead. You can’t blame the little guy for being disappointed! Half the enjoyment of an outing is the anticipation, and that goes double when you’re four years old. That’s why you should never mislead kids in this way. Or this way. Now I want to go to a broccoli farm. -via Viral Viral Videos
(Photo: Pebbles Ryan)
Aliyah Ryan, 2, of Greenville County, South Carolina needed to put on her pants in the morning. This required more coordination than she was capable of. She needed help, so she picked up the phone in her home and called 911.
The dispatcher was confused by the child's need. But, as is standard procedure, he sent a Greenville County Deputy Sheriff out to the location.
Deputy Martha Lohnes drove to Aliyah's home. Her grandfather, who didn't know about the 911 call, answered the door. Then Aliyah walked up to the door with one leg in her pants.
Deputy Lohnes helped her put on her pants the rest of the way. 7 News reports:
“I just ended up sitting down on the stairs helping he put on the rest of her pants and then it was almost like a reward, she just wanted a hug,” she explained.
Needless to say, when mom, Pebbles Ryan, got the call at work, she was a little surprised.
“I came home to “oh, the police helped your daughter put pants on”. I was like “OH! Ok?” Then she wouldn’t let any of the police leave because she wanted hugs,” said Ryan.
-via Huffington Post
Your baby has now been born. So you need a drink.
But what, precisely, should you drink? Let us consult Vanessa Rasanen of The Federalist. She's researched the perfect beers for 9 major events in baby care. For example, while potty training, you need an "easy-on-the-palate amber for the good days or a stronger imperial stout for the not-so-good." And she has some specific recommendations:
However, on those more difficult days when nothing goes as it’s supposed to and everyone’s fed up, consider switching to something a bit heftier like an imperial stout. Think Oskar Blues’ Ten Fidy or Karl Strauss’s Wreck Alley.
And what about those rough mornings? If it's 7:30 AM and you're already exhausted, then Rasanen suggests a bourbon-aged porter. Read the rest of her suggestions at The Federalist and leave your own in the comments.
When it comes to childrearing advice, we’ve come a long way, baby.
Modern parenting isn’t easy. Childcare books and blogs are filled with so much contradictory advice, it makes you want to throw your own tantrum. But there’s good news: You don’t live in centuries past, when baby advice wasn’t merely contradictory; it was also bizarre and borderline criminal.
One popular suggestion of yesteryear: Put baby in the corner and leave it there (and yes, the baby was usually called “it”). “Handle the baby as little as possible,” the 1916 book The Mother and Her Child advises. “Turn occasionally from side to side, feed it, change it, keep it warm, and let it alone; crying is absolutely essential to the development of good strong lungs.” You wouldn’t want to spoil your infant with anything so barbaric as human touch!
An 1894 manual was also pro-neglect: Crying is “the baby’s exercise,” explained Dr. L. Emmett Holt. The good doctor advised against playing with the baby until it was 6 months old, as play was thought to cause nervousness and agitation.
Those cute little tots may look kissable, but in the past you’d be wise to keep your lips to yourself. “We most strongly protest against the haphazard, promiscuous kissing of babies,” intoned The Mother and Her Child. Kissing, after all, could transmit diseases—like syphilis. If you must pucker up, kiss the top of the head. (For more insanity, I recommend Ann Hulbert’s Raising America, which includes a lovely anti-hugging tirade from 1920s behaviorist John Watson.)
The reason for her mystery illness came to light six months after the fact. Five-year-old Khloe Russell of Hemet, California, developed a runny nose that smelled awful. Her mother Katelyn Powell took her to three different doctors who diagnosed a sinus infection and gave her antibiotics, which didn’t help. The family even consulted a dentist. The reason for her problems was revealed last week when her uncle had her blow her nose again.
"My brother was like, 'Your nose, it's disgusting. Blow your nose, blow your nose.' And she blows it and out comes the safety pin," said Powell.
Black and disintegrating -- the safety pin was measured about 1.5 inches long.
"It was a huge object. It was bigger than her nose," said Powell. "We were horrified. I was like, 'Did you put this up there?' She did, but she forgot to tell me."
Katelyn Powell clarified the story in a comment at another news story.
Hey guys I'm the mom of this little girl and just so everyone knows, we did blow her nose constantly! She also wasn't building a castle out of safety pins that part of the story was added! She found a safety pin and being a kid wanted to stick it up there to see how far it would go and thought she dropped it not realizing it had lodged itself in her nose.
Khloe is feeling much better now that the source of her trouble has been eliminated. -via reddit
Kids and adults alike have grand ideas about where a toy boat will go when they set it afloat at the beach, but most toy ships simply aren't cut out for a sea voyage and end up either dashed against the rocks or sunk.
So when the fourth grade class from St. Andrew's School of Math and Science set the "Carolina Dreamer" free off the coast of South Carolina they had no idea how far it would float before sinking.
But that little toy boat proved it was made of the right stuff and somehow survived a 4000 mile trip to Wales, where it was discovered by a mom and her son who were walking along the beach.
"We were looking across the waves when it literally sailed right to us," Helen Hinks told the BBC."It was magical."
The class was able to track most of the ship's epic eight month voyage with an onboard GPS tracker, and now they're waiting to see if it will survive the return trip home.
There are two baby girls, but only one pacifier. They're sisters. But, come on, this is no ordinary pacifier. This is the Purple Pacifier.
King Solomon would offer the dad solution: cut the pacifier in half, then offer one half to each child. Then the problem is over.
-via Tastefully Offensive
This video uploaded to Facebook by user Jasmine Perez contains a rare sight. The footage shows a baby immediately after its en caul birth. "En caul" refers to a baby being born within its unbroken amniotic sac. This is a rare medical happening, occurring in approximately 1 in 80,000 births.
Typically, prior to giving birth and in the early stages of labor, a woman's "water breaks," which is a common phrase for the amniotic sac rupturing. In this case, the doctor cut open and removed the amniotic sac and the healthy baby was breathing normally.
Last year, Miss Cellania featured a photo of a baby at six months of development after being delivered by emergency C-section in its intact amniotic sac. Videos such as the one above are exceedingly rare. Via IFL Science
Mommy, whatever you do, don't go making smiley faces or other cutesy displays with this little boy's food. In this clip, he makes it clear with his tears that eating something that's smiling back at him is absolutely out of the question. Draw an ugly face instead? No, that won't do either. Leave it alone, mom! Via Laughing Squid
Rachel Nichols, a sheep farmer in Wales, has a 3-year old daughter named Lilly. The little girl is learning many practical skills on the farm. In this video, for the second time this season, she helps a sheep give birth.
She gets elbow-deep inside the mother's uterus and feels around for the direction of its body. Then she moves the baby into a good birthing position and pulls on its feet, gently bringing it into the outside world. Great job, Lilly!
-via Daily of the Day
I can so relate to this. Most of my kids’ teachers have been wonderful, enthusiastic, friendly, and knowledgable people. But there was this one kindergarten teacher who was the old schoolmarm, pursed-lips, by-the-book type that intimidated me so much I felt like an elementary student in trouble all over again, even though she was probably younger than I was at the time. It took a year to get my daughter to enjoy school again after that experience. This vignette is the latest from Lunarbaboon.
The 2-year old girl and her mother were visiting a bank in Vicenza, Italy. The young girl got bored and went wandering. She found an open time-lock safe, went inside, and closed the door. The safe was made so that, once closed, it could not be re-opened for 40 minutes.
Firefighters rushed to the scene. They used a hydraulic tool to break the safe open. The girl emerged scared, but unharmed 15 minutes later.
Considering how small the safe is, I wonder how she had enough air to breathe for that long.
That’s exactly it! So many road trips, so many questions, and they’re all the same. My answer was always “Yes,” which annoyed my kids, but they deserved it. I made them learn to read an atlas and watch the signs and mile markers. Today, they’d just pull up their GPS app. A few years of the same question over and over, and parents are quite primed to put up with the somewhat different hell of teaching kids how to drive themselves. This comic is from Kristian Nygård at Optipess. -via Geeks Are Sexy
You won’t be able to contain a giggle as you watch this kid at an amusement park obstacle course. See, the idea is that you’re supposed to avoid being hit. He doesn’t do that. Over and over.
Don’t feel bad about laughing. The kid knew what he was doing. Of course, he didn’t see every hit coming, but he did nothing at all to avoid them. This video has an appropriate soundtrack here. See, it doesn’t matter how many times life knocks you down. What matters is how many times you get back up. -via reddit
(Photo: Caroline's Cart)
This is Caroline. Her mom, Drew Ann Long, found it to be a great struggle to shop with her because Caroline needs to use a wheelchair. She's too big to fit inside the child seat of a standard shopping cart. So Long designed a shopping cart that fit her comfortably and safely. It's called Caroline's Cart.
The seat is big enough to accommodate a range of sizes, including adults, and provides full back support. It has a complete safety harness. Entering it is easy thanks to the open back end. There's a footrest and enough room in the front for groceries. Many shops, including Target, are adding them to their cart inventory to make shopping a more inclusive experience.
You can watch a video by Long describing her invention here.
-via 22 Words
This is how Dad jokes start, and become a lifelong habit for so many men. A two-year-old will laugh at anything. Bea is tickled pink to hear her Dad say Abu Dhabi. That’s silly, Daddy! There’s a joke there, but she doesn’t have to wait for the punch line to find Abu Dhabi funny. The punch line doesn’t really add much to it for her (although we can see it coming a mile away), because Bea doesn’t have any idea who the Flintstones are. But she’s so joyously entertained anyway that you have to laugh along with her! -via Tastefully Offensive
Ellen Gibson is dressing her 8-month-old triplets (Jackson, Olivia, and Levi), while their 2-year-old sister Emily tries her best to set a bad example for the little ones. And if you look closely, there’s a cat, too.
My guess is that she doesn’t dress them all at once on a normal day, but is making a video to illustrate the chaos of having this many little ones. A sane person would leave two in a crib. Dad? I don’t think he was there at the time. Follow the triplets and the rest of the family at Facebook and at their website. -via Metafilter
It's like the climactic scene of a movie.
St. John of the Cross School and St. Cletus Catholic School faced off at at Immaculate Conception High School in Illinois in the basketball game to decide the champion of the Surburban Parish League. The score was tied at 28. The clock ticked down.
Just as the buzzer rang, Jack Hlavin of St. John of the Cross hurled the ball across three-fourths of the court toward St. Cletus's basket. It swooshed through perfectly, delivering the victory to St. John of the Cross and its newest hero, Jack Hlavin.
Appropriately, the crowd erupted in delight at this amazing shot.
You're a taxi driver on a sitcom. Or you've just stepped onto an elevator with a very pregnant woman.* You need to be ready because there's a baby coming and you'll have to deliver it.
Joe Bereta of Epic How To shows us how. Is he a doctor? No, he's a comedian. That's why he urges you to seek attention from a medical rather than comedic professional should you go into labor. But in the absence of someone who knows what he's doing, here are some steps that you may wish to take.
There's just one problem with this video: it's over 7 minutes long. You may not have that long to prepare.
*Remember the Dave Barry Rule: never ask a woman if she is pregnant unless she is giving birth at that particular moment.
Dan Iverson and his wife strapped a GoPro video camera to their son's head, then played hide and seek with him. It was the boy's turn to seek. In this point-of-view video, you can almost see how the child is trying to reason about the possible hiding spots.
During the entire hunt, the parents are hiding in a closet, watching a live feed of the video on a cellphone. They might still be there now if Ollie the dog hadn't helped the boy.
-via Laughing Squid
5-month old Sam had an ear infection and was struggling to fall asleep. So his father, David Motola, turned on his electric piano and began playing Johannes Brahm's classic lullaby. It was very effective. Within a few seconds, Sam yawned broadly, then faded into sleep.
What makes this performance even more impressive is that Motola didn't have any sheet music. He was playing by ear and arranging the piece on the fly.
It's one thing to scare your own children by playing pranks on them and sometimes scarring them for life, because they're your family so scare as you see fit, but scaring someone else's child is downright sadistic.
One clearly troubled individual actually hacked into a baby monitor and proceeded to scare the wits out of a poor little kid, who kept telling his parents the "phone was talking to him" in the middle of the night.
His mother Sarah didn't know what to make of the situation until she walked into the room and heard a voice on the baby monitor saying "wake up little boy, daddy's looking for you."
Researchers revealed that most baby monitors are vulnerable to being hacked back in September, 2015, and now the proof is in that poor kid's diapers!
The staff of Jimmy Kimmel Live went out on the streets to ask children which country is the best country in the world. Their answers show that U.S. schools have dropped patriotic indoctrination lessons, and they’ve apparently also dropped basic geography.
Considering what they had to work with, the kids came up with some imaginative and amusing responses. What kid wouldn’t want to move someplace where they could have their own koala? -via Uproxx
P.T. Barnum is quoted as saying "Always leave them wanting more"- when you have the audience wrapped around your finger and dying to see what you're going to do next you should bow, say thanks and split.
But this motto can also be applied to performers who are bombing, because if they can do something to win the audience back before exiting the stage the crowd will go wild.
The kid in this video may have just moonwalked his way into the hearts of America, and I've never seen somebody turn the crowd's attitude around so quickly after bombing so badly! Maybe he should try his hand at stand up comedy?
-Via FAIL Blog
We start out reading this comic believing that the baby is the one faking. She’s not really in distress; she just wants your attention. Then it becomes apparent that Dad remembers how to fake a really deep sleep. But Mom knows, too, and what to do about it. Mom doesn't fool around. You can laugh, if you’re far removed from those sleep-deprived days of caring for an infant. And there are a lot of women who remember crawling into the crib just to get a little alone time. This comic is from Lunarbaboon.