In the long line of stupid criminals featured on Neatorama before, this one is probably the stupidest (and probably loneliest): Stephfon Bennet, 20, allegedly robbed a woman and then returned a couple of hours later … to ask his victim out on a date!

"We are not exactly sure what he was thinking at the time," said Columbus police Sgt. Sean Laird. "She recognized him right away when he returned and was able to have her cousin call 911."

Officers arrived and arrested Bennett in front of the house, police said.

Link

Stupid criminals who love to brag about their crimes aren’t new, but add social networking to the mix and police have a new tool to bust them. It’s a new kind of justice … Facebook justice!

Asylum has a nifty post about the 6 crimes solved by the popular social networking website. For example:

Lesson #1: If you spray paint a special tag all around town, you might not want to brand it to your Facebook page.

We totally get the need to broadcast talents to friends on Facebook — that’s what it’s for, right? But unless you’re Banksy, your masterful tags probably won’t go over too well with the feds. That’s why, when specific tags were appearing all over Winnipeg, officers received a tip directing them to Facebook, where they found the same designs on an 18-year-old’s page.

Lesson #2: If you get caught on surveillance camera, just because you don’t have a mug shot on file doesn’t mean your face isn’t already out there for the finding.

Smile! … Or not. The Queenstown police of southern New Zealand nabbed their first Facebook crook after they caught a good shot of a burglar looking directly at the security camera after removing his mask. Quickly after posting the shot to their two-month-old page, tipsters sent suggestions and they identified the 21-year-old thief.

Link

Talkin’ bout stupid criminals, check out this mugger in Bromley, London, who actually tried on the stolen necklace and admired his reflection … on the tram’s CCTV lens!

Dc Dan Arundell, of British Transport Police’s robbery squad, said: "The CCTV images are very clear.

"It was quite clear that he was checking himself out in the reflection of the CCTV camera.

"The general consensus is that he is not the brightest spark. He was there for a long time and either didn’t care or wasn’t aware he was being filmed."

Link

Previously on Neatorama: Thief Took Own Mugshot | Top 10 Stupid Criminals of 2007

In a crowded field of stupid criminals, these two have got a good chance of being the stupidest ever: watch this clip from LawyerShop TV as these two doofus tried to break into a building by throwing boulders through the window … I won’t give away the ending, so you gotta watch.

Hit play or go to Link [YouTube]

We’ve featured many stupid criminals on Neatorama, but I think this guy may just be the dumbest one yet. Meet Charles Ray Fuller, who was arrested for forgery when he tried to pass a check for … $360 billion! (Yes, that’s $360,000,000,000).

He claimed that it was given to him by his girlfriend’s mother to start a record business.

Link – via reddit

If you’re afraid of being in a bank during a bank robbery, don’t go to the bank on Friday mornings between 9 a.m. and 11 a.m.

Banks used to have more money on a Friday because it was historically a payday. Also, bank robbers believed that there’s more money in the bank at the beginning of the day rather than the end. Interestingly, banks in the supermarkets are actually safer than a regular bank branch. (Source)

The photo is the infamous Duct Tape Robber, read more about him and other stupid criminals in Neatorama’s Top 10 Stupid Criminals of 2007.

Two more bank robbery facts:

The Largest Bank Heist in History
The largest bank heist in history occurred in 2003, when nearly $1 billion was stolen from the Central Bank of Iraq just hours after US bombed Baghdad in the Iraq War. The culprit was Saddam Hussein and his family. Only about half of the money was recovered (source).

The First U.S. Bank Robbery
The first bank to be robbed in the United States was the Bank of Pennsylvania. The vault was robbed of $162,821 ($1.8 million in 2006 dollar) in 1798.

Because there was no sign of forced entry, the authorities believed that it was an inside job (locks on the vault’s door was just changed). The blacksmith that changed the lock was Pat Lyon, who left Pennsylvania to escape a raging yellow fever epidemic that swept Philadelphia. Lyon suspected that a carpenter was responsible, and went back to Philly to clear his name. The authorities didn’t believe him and threw him in the Walnut Prison.

The culprit turned out to be someone who earlier had visited Lyon’s shop, named Isaac Davis. He and a partner (an inside man, the bank porter who later died in the epidemic) pulled off the heist but did something monumentally stupid: he started to deposit his stolen money back in the bank! Confronted by the authorities, Davis confessed and gave back all the money. As part of a plea deal, he never served a day in prison.

Even after that confession, the authorities refused to release Lyon. Later, charges against him were dismissed and Lyon sued the bank and law officials. He got $12,000 (a large amount at the time) for false imprisonment.

Pat Lyon at the Forge by John Neagle (1892)

Pat Lyon, who became a hero after his trial, was immortalized by a painting by John Neagle titled Pat Lyon at the Forge. If you look closely, there’s a cupola of the Walnut Prison in the background.

A policeman’s job is never easy, but dumb criminals make it somewhat easier. This list was whittled down from a much longer list of stories of the stupid things lawbreakers did this past year. These are in chronological order instead of rank. The dates are from the news stories; in some cases the crime itself happened earlier. Most of the links have accompanying video.

1. Lottery Thief Sets Himself on Fire

ROME, GA June 2
A convenience-store thief got away, but the video from the security camera told a strange, strange tale. A man broke into the store overnight, and tried to cover his tracks by burning the place down. He threw charcoal lighter fluid around, but by the time he ignited it, the fumes had permeated the store, and he set himself on fire. While in flames, he grabbed a roll of lottery tickets and fled. At the time of the story, police were looking for a man with facial, neck, and possibly wrist burns.

2. Ten Hours Stuck in Restaurant Vent

HILLSBOROUGH COUNTY, FL June 8
An employee of the Lucky Buffet noticed a strange sight on arriving at the restaurant. There were legs hanging out of a vent over the grill! 45-year-old Billy Jordan had tried to enter the restaurant the night before by climbing through the ductwork, but became stuck and stayed there for ten hours. Hillsborough County Fire Rescue workers used a rope to pull Jordan back out through the roof, after which he was arrested for burglary.

3. Immovable ATM

MILWAUKEE, WI July 27
Three men backed a stolen vehicle through the glass front of a gas station. Their intent was to steal an ATM. But they didn’t realize that ATMs are bolted to the floor. After some thought, they tied a rope around the machine and attched it to the vehicle, but still could not dislodge it. They left empty-handed. The ATM was still in working order the next day.

4. The Famous Duct Tape Bandit

ASHLAND, KY August 13
Police say Kasey Kazee entered Shamrock Liquors and attempted to rob the store. Employees were astonished that he had disguised his face by wrapping it in duct tape! The store manager chased him out with a baseball bat and an employee held him in the parking lot until police arrived. Police removed the duct tape after taking pictures, and arrested Kazee, who denied any memory of the incident.
See a video report here.

5. The Sign of the Crime

ADLINGTON, ENGLAND September 6
Peter Addison and his friend Mark Ridgeway vandalized the Toc H centre, a children’s campsite building. They smashed crockery, set off fire extinguishers, and drew grafitti on the walls. Part of the grafitti said “Peter Addison was here.” Police found Addison through a computer database. Both teenagers pled guilty and were ordered to pay for the damage.

Inspector Gareth Woods, of Cheshire Police, said: “This crime is up there with the dumbest of all in the criminal league table.

“There are some pretty stupid criminals around, but to leave your own name at the scene of the crime takes the biscuit.”

6. He Didn’t See the Cop

LITTLE ROCK, AR September 7
21-year-old Langston Robins walked right past a uniformed police officer at the Metropolitan Bank and handed a robbery note to the teller. The unarmed would-be robber was arrested after a foot pursuit. Little Rock police spokesman Lt. Terry Hastings said:

“I just don’t know why he didn’t see a uniformed police officer standing basically right in front of him,” Hastings tells the Associated Press. “My guess is he’s just not the brightest of people.”

7. He Stole a Car to Turn Himself In

GENEVA, NY September 13
29-year-old Vincent Estrada Junior was pulled over because the car he was driving had been stolen from a parking lot. Estrada explained that he had stolen the car in order to drive to the Geneva City Police Department and turn himself in on a family court warrant! He didn’t make his destination, as police took him to the Ontario County Jail instead, where he was held on car theft charges.

(image credit: Ontario County Sheriff’s Office)

8. Burglar Falls Asleep Under Victim’s Bed

WHITLEY BAY, England September 17
Usually, the burglar robs the house while the victim is asleep, but in this story, the roles were reversed. 24-year-old Mark Smith sneaked into Heather Stephenson’s home, crept past her while she was ironing, and rifled through her belongings in the bedroom. Then he fell asleep under her bed. Mrs. Stephenson couldn’t wake him, and police officers had to drag him out from under the bed. Smith’s vodka and valium consumption were to blame. He received an 18-month sentence for burglary.

9. Cash My Million-Dollar Bill!

PITTSBURGH, PA November 9
A man flew into a rage at the Giant Eagle supermarket when employees refused to cash a million-dollar bill. 66-year-old Samuel Porter slammed an electronic machine on the counter and refused to give his name to authorities. He was then taken to the Allegheny County Jail. The largest bill currently in circulation is the $100 dollar bill.

Bonus: It happened again soon afterwards in Georgia!

(image credit: AP)

10. Carjacking at a Crime Scene

RALEIGH, NC December 11
There had been a stabbing, and police were on the scene talking to a woman who had been a witness to the crime. 38-year-old Anthony William jumped into the woman’s car and drove away! He was arrested the next day, easily identified by the cops who saw him steal the car.

Next to stupid criminals, I loooove stupid home shopping hosts making a fool of themselves. Here’s an example of Harold trying to sell a Flex-O-Ladder.

See what happens: Hit play or go to Link [Break.com video] – Thanks College Online!

Update 10/21/07: Neatorama reader Chris Reyes sent in another clip, this time a home shopping channel host falling off a ladder (ouch!): Link – Thanks Chris!

Bad Idea: robbing a bank
Really Bad Idea: robbing a bank without a weapon
Priceless: robbing a bank without a weapon, right in front of a uniformed officer!

Add this to our ever-growing list of stupid criminals on Neatorama:

Langston Robins, 21, is accused of walking past an off-duty officer and then trying to hold up the Metropolitan Bank on Wednesday in Little Rock.

"As far as we know, the robber didn’t have a weapon. He just walked up with a note and laid it on the counter, right in front of the uniformed officer," Little Rock police spokesman Lt. Terry Hastings tells KATV-TV.

Police took Robins into custody after a foot pursuit.

"I just don’t know why he didn’t see a uniformed police officer standing basically right in front of him," Hastings tells the Associated Press. "My guess is he’s just not the brightest of people."

Here’s the video:

Link

Just when I thought we got the world’s dumbest criminal (the guy that left his resume during a bank robbery) another contender popped up: the robber that wrote his name on the wall at the scene of the crime!

Apart from writing his own name in black marker pen at the Toc H centre in Adlington, Cheshire, Addison also left his gang’s name on the wall – The Adlington Massiv!.

The teenager vandalised a Garden Birds of Britain poster by adding "R Gay". He then left a final message to the campsite owners – "thanks for the stay".

Police found him after entering his name in a computer system. Inspector Gareth Woods, of Cheshire Police, said: "This crime is up there with the dumbest of all in the criminal league table. "There are some pretty stupid criminals around, but to leave your own name at the scene of the crime takes the biscuit.

Link – Thanks Laura Girdwood!

See also: The Duct Tape Robber