The Food Network has a recipe for peanut butter sandwiches. It involves parchment paper, a rolling pin, and kitchen shears. And the prep time is three hours and five minutes. The idea is that you can, I don't know, make better sandwiches by preparing frozen slices of peanut butter ahead of time, then just plop one on a piece of bread …and then wait for it to thaw. While the recipe itself got 5.5 stars out of six, the comments are priceless.
This is a real life saver. Who has time to get a butter knife and spread peanut butter in the morning. Better to roll it out the night before and using kitchen scissors (but not a butter knife! Burn in hell, butter knife) cut a slab of frozen peanut butter instead.
And even more so on Facebook, where you can see a video of how it's done.
She must be one of those people from infomercials who can't pour milk, and find themselves in an avalanche of Tupperware falling from their cabinets.
I've never met a soul who rips the bread with peanut butter.