It'll be June before I finally get into the habit of writing the correct year.
The UFO/alien is a symbol of the immense and immeasurable universe and all its possibilities. As anyone who has ever found themselves at the cold, steely end of an extraterrestrial's medical examination can tell you, aliens are already here and living among us. They are benevolent creatures who wish to study us and learn what they can about our culture. Disguised as earthly creatures of all sorts, they watch us daily. You undoubtedly know many and do not realize it. My Aunt Ruth is an alien. Two of my three brothers-in-law are. Most fast-food workers are, as well as some dogs and all cats. It has been scientifically proven that people who disagree with this are stupid.
ACTIVITY TO IMPROVE BIZARRO AWARENESS
Print out the alien on this page and tape him to the lining of your jacket. When you suspect someone may be an alien, simply flash the picture where only they can see it, and say quietly, "You're not fooling me--I know all about you. Use the following chart to judge whether or not they are extraterrestrial by their response.
Ignore you: probably
Laugh in your face: definitely
Full confession: definitely not