Are CliffsNotes (well, it ws Cliff's Notes when I was in school) still too long for you?
Then you need this: RinkWorks' Book-A-Minute website where you can catch up on all the classic literature you've been meaning to read. For example:
The Catcher In the Rye by J.D. Salinger
Holden Caulfield: “Angst angst angst swear curse swear crazy crazy angst swear curse, society sucks, and I’m a stupid jerk.”
Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
Mr. Darcy: "Nothing is good enough for me."
Ms. Elizabeth Bennet: "I could never marry that proud man."
(They change their minds.)
Previously on Neatorama: Movie-A-Minute (by the same people)