Steven M. Johnson comes up with all sorts of wacky inventions in his weekly Museum of Possibilities posts, but something's missing from his strange gadgets: names. Can you come up with a name for this one? The commenter suggesting the funniest and wittiest name will win a free T-shirt from the NeatoShop.

Update: We couldn't decide between two great entries, so a first place tie was declared. Mike Struthers suggested Parkaderm, and scarab suggested Pachytherms. Both are awesome!