Terrible Superhero Sidekicks

Behind every good super-hero is a good sidekick, but behind every good sidekick is a long line of chumps who just couldn't cut it.

Weird Worm has a list of the Top 5 Terrible Superhero Sidekicks, starting with this one:

Demolition Man
As Seen In: Daredevil, Captain America

As an aspiring athlete, Dennis Dunphy undergoes strength augmentation from the questionably named Power Broker, Inc. to the point where he can lift fifteen tons. Unable to think of a reasonable scenario where he would need to lift fifteen tons, he returns to the world of sports only to find that other badminton players are made very uncomfortable by musclebound men. Now too strong for normal athletes, he joins a wrestling league for super-beings like the Beyonder and the Thing.

After the super-being wrestling league collapses (who would have guessed there wasn’t a market for that?) he becomes one of Captain America’s many, many sidekicks. After he is abducted by Power Broker and forced to undergo strength augmentation again, the strain of his new rippling abs causes a heart attack. Now a sidekick to the unsung hero ‘Heart Failure’, Demolition Man settles with managing Captain America’s hotline, making him the first super-secretary in the history of fiction.

Link


Pete Ross turned up as a character on the TV show Smallville; in some quarters, he earned the nickname "Product Placement Pete", for his relentless in-character shilling of sponsors' products. (Maybe that was his real superpower all along..)
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