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Caption Monkey 67: Mum's the Word

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Alex has been kind enough to hand me the keys to the weekly Caption Monkey contest, so I thought I'd start this party with a photo of my own. I won't provide the context for this one though, because I'm intrigued to see what our intrepid crew of comical photo captioneers will come up with.

The rules are simple: the best caption wins a monkey drawing by yours truly, the ever-lovin' Ape Lad. Place your caption in the comment section. One caption per comment, please, though you may enter as many times as you’d like. You have approximately 24 hours to bring the funny.

If you have a photo you think would be a good candidate for this contest, add it to the group pool here on flickr. If I use your photo, I'll send you a surprise!

UPDATE!

We have a winner, and it's #28, Seppukku, with "I'm telling you guys, my infallible plan will totally get us in the ladies bathroom!" Congratulations, and thanks for playing everyone! See you next week!

Pledge week at the Koford household.

It's an age old tradition where parents assemble their offspring and tell them that due to the harsh economic climate, they can only afford to keep 3 out of the 4 children. Obviously the most well-behaved ones get to stay.

It's a surprisingly effective parenting technique.
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Don't say ANYTHING and don't look down. Don't look down, don't look down. It's either an apple or a grenade, and if I look down, it's gunna be a grenade.
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I will wipe more at bathroom time.
I will wipe more at bathroom time.
I will wipe more at bathroom time.
I will wipe more at bathroom time.
I will wipe more at bathroom time.
I will wipe more at bathroom time.
I will wipe more at bathroom time.
I will wipe more at bathroom time.
I will wipe more at bathroom time.
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Unable to locate the anticipated mummies from his latest dig, Zahi Hawass snaps, gathering children at gunpoint from a nearby school, forcing them to wrap themselves with toilet paper.
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Just when Bobby thought health class couldn't make him feel any more uncomfortable, Ms. Frizby cast the boys in her one act play "Stay Free! The Wonders of Feminine Hygiene".
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I don't CARE if it's raining, dammit! Your mother worked hard on these costumes and you WILL wear them trick-or-treating! They're 3-ply, for chrissakes...you kids are so ungrateful. When I was a boy, I didn't even GET TP to use for my mummy costume...I had to use notebook paper. Now get your undead tushes out there and get some candy!!!
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Both impulsive and indiscriminate, Travis the school bully spotted a token of affection on the 4th grade teacher's desk and inflicted his unique brand of unholy terror onto any child he suspected of being Miss Harrison's "pet." In the aftermath, as the victims stood before Vice Principal Larson, the Granny Smith in question was hesitantly placed at their feet. No one had the courage -- or senselessness, for that matter -- to claim ownership.
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We are sick and tired of you humans biting into our apple homes then treating them as trash. We appear before to seek peace or revenge, your choice. - the worm council.
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Why the Mummy got a bigger budget: the original auditionees for the role of the mummy finally convinced the stingy producers that they needed lots of CGI.
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As they arrived at school, Timmy, being the only one without his eyesight blocked, pondered how to break the news to his friends that every other kid in their class had understood the acronym for today’s special dress-up event correctly as Appreciation Day for Today’s Patriots.
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Oops, sorry for my bad English, should have been:

As they arrived at school, Timmy, being the only one without his eyesight blocked, pondered how to break the news to his friends that all of the other kids in their class had understood the acronym for today’s special dress-up event correctly as Appreciation Day for Today’s Patriots.
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With his hostages securely wrapped in silk, Spider Man calmly takes a Prozac, sips a Kane West Cognac, and places a call to Larry King to negotiate terms of release.
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I can fix this. Billy, you can go as a mummy. Johnny, you're a burn victim. Peter, you're a really bad stunt man who's recovering in the ICU. Craig, you're a ninja who's been sent to Alaska. And Timmy, you can be Mumm-Ra from Thundercats. What's that? IT DOESN'T MATTER WHO THE THUNDERCATS ARE, JUST ENJOY THE DAMN HALLOWEEN PARTY.
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