Dear Blockbuster Member,

By Miss Cellania in Film on Nov 16, 2009 at 10:34 pm

David Thorne is at it again. The guy who tried to pay a bill with a picture of a spider and suffered through a surprise apartment inspection now has overdue video rentals. The correspondence between Thorne and Blockbuster Video goes about as you’d expect (if you can’t dazzle them with brilliance…), but there is a delicious twist at the end.

Dear Megan,

With the possible exception of Harold and Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay, the movies were not worth watching let alone stealing. In Logan’s Run, for example, the computer crashed at the end when presented with conflicting facts and blew up destroying the entire city. When my computer crashes I carry on a little bit and have a cigarette while it is rebooting. I don’t have to search through rubble for my loved ones. The same programmers probably designed the Blockbuster ‘returned or not’ database.

Link -via Digg

Tags: blockbuster, David Thorne, fiction, video rentals

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Cooper
Nov 16th, 2009 at 11:15 pm
hmmm, starting to get a bit old, isn’t it?
Nick
Nov 16th, 2009 at 11:27 pm
Yeah, a poor attempt to copy The Groucho Letters. Doesn’t even come close.
pwscott
Nov 16th, 2009 at 11:57 pm
lol Maybe a painting of a squirrell will cover the cost.:p
Jerse
Nov 17th, 2009 at 1:19 am
bahaha – this guys is smart. just by talking to the lady, he got an $80 late fee turned into $0 because he can just return the movies with no late fee…

genius
Tim Giachetti
Nov 17th, 2009 at 2:10 am
Honestly I think the guy is just a small time grifter.
He’ll be in the news in the next few years for a ponzi or extortion.
OddNumber
Nov 17th, 2009 at 8:18 am
It is a shame that some people think they are special and need to game the system for the fun of it. It means that the system will be that much more skeptical when they get genuine requests for assistance.
Skipweasel
Nov 17th, 2009 at 10:37 am
Seems like he has too much time on his hands.
eightcell
Nov 17th, 2009 at 6:08 pm
I had Blockbuster accuse me of never returning a game. When I talked to the manager she claimed I came back in with the game and exchanged it for another. This never happened and I haven’t returned to Blockbuster for the last 4 or 5 years.

Netflix is amazing btw.
G
Nov 17th, 2009 at 8:35 pm
Ha ha! That’s hilarious! This sounds like my spouse and how he finagled debt payments. Funny part is I think he is telling the truth the majority of the time. Thank you for this.
lapidus
Nov 17th, 2009 at 9:20 pm
pretty sure this guy is just doing a put-on written comedy routine. several times over, in different forms.
ted
Nov 18th, 2009 at 6:22 am
Yeah, it’s the same shtick, different pile.
Meep
Nov 19th, 2009 at 12:11 pm
Boy, this guy has REALLY bad taste in movies. No wonder he didn’t want to return them – imagine having to walk in carrying those stinkers.
Moe
Dec 2nd, 2009 at 6:47 pm
I like the fact that he had them all along.

If you read his other entries, it’s a wonder he hasn’t gotten evicted by now.

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