Judge Rules "Crunchberries" Are Not Real

Posted by Queuebot in Crime & Law, Food & Drinks on June 7, 2009 at 2:22 pm


Here’s proof that people will sue just for about anything: a plaintiff named Janine Sugawara sued the makers of Cap’N Crunch Crunch Berries cereal because she found out that the "crunchberries" are not really berries!

In another proof that the judicial system works,  the judge dismissed her complaint:

On May 21, a judge of the U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of California dismissed a complaint filed by a woman who said she had purchased “Cap’n Crunch with Crunchberries” because she believed “crunchberries” were real fruit. The plaintiff, Janine Sugawara, alleged that she had only recently learned to her dismay that said “berries” were in fact simply brightly-colored cereal balls, and that although the product did contain some strawberry fruit concentrate, it was not otherwise redeemed by fruit. She sued, on behalf of herself and all similarly situated consumers who also apparently believed that there are fields somewhere in our land thronged by crunchberry bushes.

Cap’n According to the complaint, Sugawara and other consumers were misled not only by the use of the word “berries” in the name, but also by the front of the box, which features the product’s namesake, Cap’n Crunch, aggressively “thrusting a spoonful of ‘Crunchberries’ at the prospective buyer.” Plaintiff claimed that this message was reinforced by other marketing representing the product as a “combination of Crunch biscuits and colorful red, purple, teal and green berries.” Yet in actuality, the product contained “no berries of any kind.” Plaintiff brought claims for fraud, breach of warranty, and our notorious and ever-popular California Unfair Competition Law and Consumer Legal Remedies Act.

Link – via kevinunderhill

From the Upcoming ueue, submitted by dradell.


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COMMENT

38 comments to "Judge Rules "Crunchberries" Are Not Real"

  1. LisaL
    June 7th, 2009 at 2:30 pm

    Good god.... are people really that dumb? Just.. wow... I want to slap the hell out of that stupid woman.

  2. bigB
    June 7th, 2009 at 2:38 pm

    FFS!!!

  3. EU_dig
    June 7th, 2009 at 2:43 pm

    Well, I'm glad they cleared that up. I nearly wasted my weekend romping around the woods, in search of these 'Crunchberries'.

  4. Bret Hammond
    June 7th, 2009 at 2:48 pm

    Not only are Crunchberries NOT real berries, but Cap'n is not an actual military rank!

  5. Johnny Cat
    June 7th, 2009 at 3:24 pm

    Plaintiff has now decided to go into beekeeping, using Honeycomb cereal as an affordable start-up.

  6. Skipweasel
    June 7th, 2009 at 3:44 pm

    Wonder whether she uses an Apple or a Blackberry and how she gets bit bits of keypad out from between her teeth.

  7. Kalel
    June 7th, 2009 at 3:45 pm

    I think Crunchberries are dried Booberries.

  8. GailW
    June 7th, 2009 at 3:54 pm

    This complaint never should have even made it to court. What an idiot.

  9. Guest
    June 7th, 2009 at 4:16 pm

    Only in America..

  10. zav
    June 7th, 2009 at 4:36 pm

    That woman needs to read the ingredients or be shot. Maybe both.

  11. Vonskippy
    June 7th, 2009 at 4:47 pm

    Apparently her local Lotto vendor was closed the day she thought up that scam.

  12. Hootie McBoob
    June 7th, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    Shoot...I guess this means I'll have to reconsider my plan to sue Apple Jacks for not containing any applejack.

  13. Mouserz
    June 7th, 2009 at 5:59 pm

    I'M SUING HOT DOGS BECAUSE THEY'RE NOT MADE FROM DOGS!

  14. thedistractor
    June 7th, 2009 at 6:00 pm

    GailW, it says that the complaint was dismissed by the judge. I have a feeling that the motion to dismiss was filed long before the case made it to court. Judges don't like cases like this anymore than regular joes like use do.

  15. seekshelter
    June 7th, 2009 at 8:10 pm

    i just found out that count chocula doesn't really hold a title.... which really bites since ive been enlisted in his army for 2 years now fighting the crispy critters... who.. are not actually critters at all...but cereal...

  16. Deinfinityx
    June 7th, 2009 at 8:29 pm

    Wow just wow some Americans are really that stupid. I wish i could punch her in the face, just like the idiot that sued over spilling HOT coffee in her own dumb ass lap.

  17. Froggotheman
    June 7th, 2009 at 9:30 pm

    People are MORONS!!

  18. D Bozko
    June 7th, 2009 at 9:46 pm

    Deinfinityx that woman in the coffee lawsuit didn't spill the coffe into her lap. The coffee, being judged overtly hot in court as admitted to by the people that made the it, burned through the bottom of the cup causing third degree burns on the woman's nether regions. It wasn't simply spilled nor was she an idiot. Look it up.

  19. Deinfinityx
    June 8th, 2009 at 7:28 am

    OK fine; touche to that; but what about the idiot that put his RV on cruise control then got up to make coffee. I do believe he got the Darwin award. I could continue to spout off hundred of idiots that make retarded litigious claims just to get rich or because they are that stupid.

  20. Gauldar
    June 8th, 2009 at 8:17 am

    Damnit! This Soilent Green is not really made from people, I'm going to sue unless I get the real thing!

  21. Morgan
    June 8th, 2009 at 8:24 am

    I wish it was possible to sue people for being stupid.

  22. Scotchdrnkr
    June 8th, 2009 at 8:35 am

    I really doubt if she really thought they were real berries. She was just out to make $ hoping the cereal company would settle out of court rather than fight her on it.
    Unfournately our Judicial system does have this tiny flaw.Anyone can sue anyone anbout anything. All you have to do is file the papers.
    But most of the time it works, but only when the Judges have some common sense.

  23. Joey Plex
    June 8th, 2009 at 9:52 am

    This is hilarious, and a perfect example of what a litigious society we live in. Look up any of the lawsuits between major corporations and you might have the same reaction. Big companies sueing for stupid reasons. We don't hear about it as frequently as cases like this, but they do exist, except the money involved is in the multi millions. It's the American way.

  24. sushirama
    June 8th, 2009 at 9:56 am

    This is like me going after Ben&Jerrys over their Chunky Monkey flavored ice cream. There I was expecting some good ole monkey goodness(or even imitation monkey goodness) and pfft nothing. This wasnt so bad for me but my Viet and Cambodian friends we sorely disappointed after lookng for some flavors from the homeland and just getting plain olde 20 percent butter fat ice cream with no monkey meat(real or imitation) to offset the carbohydrates.

    I did settle out of court for 2 free quarts of Chubby Hubby though. With the 20 percent butter fat it really is kinda hard to tell the difference.

  25. MadMolecule
    June 8th, 2009 at 10:20 am

    She's not stupid; she's corrupt. I don't believe for a moment that she actually thought there were "Crunchberries" in the cereal. She just wanted to make a buck.

  26. pyroger101
    June 8th, 2009 at 10:29 am

    what a goobert....

  27. lordjam
    June 8th, 2009 at 11:15 am

    D Bozko, turns out you're a little off on the mcdonald's coffee burn story. she was holding the cup in her lap and attempted to open the lid to add sugar and cream. unfortunately, she spilled the coffee and it soaked through her sweatpants, thereby keeping hot coffee on her groin long enough to cause a burn. frankly, in my opinion, that's her own fault. i don't think she would have poured a cup of tea over her lap, so why grip a scalding hot cup of coffee there? besides, unless this was the first time she had coffee from macca's she should have known it would be scalding. frivolous lawsuits clog the system. the judicial system really has much better things to do, imho.

  28. Gauldar
    June 8th, 2009 at 11:35 am

    Hmm, I heard that the guy serving it accidently spilled it on her due to the lid not properly being put on. I've found this to be one of the biggest broken telephone examples ever given, each one is different is some way catered to helping the person make a point. Anyone have proof of the exact details of this incident and multiple sources to back it up? Unfortunately my work's computer networking is blocking a lot of the links as "entertainment"... sigh.

  29. off_leash
    June 8th, 2009 at 11:51 am

    Fix that woman a hot steaming bowl of dingleberries!

  30. Wes
    June 8th, 2009 at 11:57 am

    "A vascular surgeon determined that Liebeck suffered full thickness burns (or third-degree burns). ... She was hospitalized for eight days, during which time she underwent skin grafting. ... McDonalds ... held its coffee at between 180 and 190 degrees fahrenheit. Other establishments sell coffee at substantially lower temperatures, and coffee served at home is generally 135 to 140 degrees."

    http://www.lectlaw.com/files/cur78.htm

    "But what about the idiot that put his RV on cruise control then got up to make coffee. ... I could continue to spout off hundred of idiots that make retarded litigious claims just to get rich or because they are that stupid."

    I'm sure you could, but I'd recommend looking them up first rather than simply plucking them merrily from your anus.

    http://www.snopes.com/autos/techno/cruise.asp

  31. Screen Sleuth
    June 8th, 2009 at 12:57 pm

    Gosh, the IQ of people in the world dips a point or so every few generation, methinks.

  32. SenorMysterioso
    June 8th, 2009 at 1:03 pm

    http://overlawyered.com/2005/10/urban-legends-and-stella-liebeck-and-t he-mcdonalds-coffee-case/

  33. Gregory
    June 8th, 2009 at 1:25 pm

    D Bozko- "The coffee, being judged overtly hot...burned through the bottom of the cup...Look it up."

    Okay, I did look it up, and can't seem to find one single report that says the coffee burned thru the bottom of the cup, but instead, she DID spill it while taking the lid off...and no, it didn't melt her sweatpants either if you belive that one too.

  34. Francois Tremblay
    June 8th, 2009 at 1:34 pm

    "the judicial system works"

    HAHA! I see, this is a comedy blog. Well done.

  35. Gauldar
    June 8th, 2009 at 2:02 pm

    @SenorMysterioso

    Thanks for clearing that up.

  36. Oscar
    June 8th, 2009 at 2:55 pm

    D Bozko you are a f****ing moron. The lady did spill the coffee in her own lap. Liquid coffee CANNOT be over 100C (boiling). There is no way it could burn through the cup. It may have been hotter than is traditionally served, but it was not even close enough to burn through a cup. Try thinking a little bit before spouting off total BS. Maybe you wont look like so much of a wanker.

  37. ted
    June 8th, 2009 at 8:02 pm

    Good for her. I've been eating Lucky Charms since I was a kid, and I still haven't won the lottery.

  38. celticanglican
    June 8th, 2009 at 11:29 pm

    "Here's your sign" award, anyone? :)


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