How to Profit From the Coming Rapture

At first I thought this was a tongue-in-cheek photoshopped book cover, but How to Profit From the Coming Rapture: Getting Ahead When You're Left Behind is actually a real book.

Well, actually make that a fake real book. It's a made up, satirical how-to book by Steve and Evie Levy, who wrote:

Are the end times near? Is the Rapture really just around the corner? Could Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson possibly be right? About 1 billion people among us believe, yes, absolutely.

And that means one thing: investment opportunities!

For those who are not as expertly versed in the Book of Revelation, Ellis Weiner and Barbara Davilman, authors of the bestselling Yiddish with Dick and Jane, helpfully offer both illumination and advice: What exactly is the Rapture, anyway? How is it different from the Tribulation? Who are the Antichrist, the Four Horsemen, and the 144,000 male virgins, and what do they want? And, most important, how can I make money during the 7 years of societal breakdown before Armaggedon?

Taking the familiar form of a how-to investment guide, HOW TO PROFIT FROM THE COMING RAPTURE instructs those readers who will certainly be left behind (Jews, Catholics, Muslims, Buddhists, Hindus, less ardent Protestants, and many more) on how to exploit the inevitable demise of the world in order to make a tidy profit. Sure, the rivers and seas will run with blood, locusts will swarm, mountains will move all over the place, and famine will strike. But for the five billion of us left behind, the post-Rapture world will be a time of even more unique investment opportunities.

Link - via Information Junk


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1 billion people raptured?

I think someone is blowing their figures up. Way up.
I bet you'll have trouble even finding a few million fundie X-tians who truly believe in the rapture.

Sure, they are very loud and obnoxious on the internet, which may make it seem like there's a lot more of them. But seriously? 1 billion?
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Yes!! There's also a website that you can pay into now, pre-rapture, that will then messages to your loved ones left behind after the big, you know, whatever. So good.

Do people who believe in the rapture really Believe in the rapture? Know what I mean? Seems like it would take a pretty hefty degree of willful self-deception even for the "faithful." But I suppose your self-deception muscles are nice and strong if you already believe the earth is like, 6 weeks old and stuff.
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I kinda liked Larfin Jackarse's comment, and I also would understand why he/she thought it might get deleted. And it does hold a grain of truth.

I really hate to post political opinions on Neatorama, which is a lighthearted forum. But, Larfin has a point: parodying Christians who preach coming of the Messiah is considered a joke, but parodying Jews who preach the coming of the Messiah is considered antisemitism (unless the parodist is a Jew, in which case it will be considered self-loathing).

Heck, even criticizing the policies of the government of Israel (which is not a religious entity) will lead to loud cries of antisemitism. Just try it on any online forum and you'll see the result.

Alejo
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Some religious zealots, who can't use reason to convince other people to adopt their beliefs, resort to intimidation. Now, compare these zealots to people like Larfin Jackarse, and you'll see that the similarities are striking.
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