Michael Minelli wants you to know he's not a douchebag, or at least, he doesn't think so. That's why he's suing the author and publisher of the book "Hot Chicks With Douchebags" for including him. The libel lawsuit should be interesting, as the lawyers will have to establish the relative "douchebaggery" of Minelli. I think the prosecution might have a hard time after seeing a picture of Minelli, who claims the book has caused him to receive "hatred, contempt, and humiliation" and has resulted in "friends, acquaintances, coworkers, employees, and strangers alike" calling him a "douchebag." Here's a quick excerpt of the page in question:
[Minelli's] popped-collar, spikey-haired presence was so far beyond regular douche, so far beyond uberdouche, he could spontaneously create a new element on the periodic tables--Douche Nine.