Offensive Weaponry

Posted by Miss Cellania in Weapons & War on October 2, 2008 at 10:17 am


Israel has developed a new weapon that should be less harmful than the rubber bullets they use against protesters. It’s a liquid called Skunk, to be deployed from a water cannon.

Imagine the worst, most foul thing you have ever smelled. An overpowering mix of rotting meat, old socks that haven’t been washed for weeks – topped off with the pungent waft of an open sewer.

Imagine being covered in the stuff as it is liberally sprayed from a water cannon.

Then imagine not being able to get rid of the stench for at least three days, no matter how often you try to scrub yourself clean.

Skunk is made from yeast, baking soda, and some secret ingredients that are completely organic. David Ben Harosh, an Israeli police superintendent, is proud of the Skunk project.

“It’s totally harmless, you can even drink it,”

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COMMENT

18 comments to "Offensive Weaponry"

  1. kef
    October 2nd, 2008 at 11:24 am

    i just dont understand israeli officials sometimes. i mean why bother with developing a new weapon when you can hose those palestinians with actual sewage.
    its not like they are human or anything!

  2. gl3nk
    October 2nd, 2008 at 11:50 am

    @kef: Typical Zionist racist scum.

    whatreallyhappened.com

  3. JivesTheButler
    October 2nd, 2008 at 11:50 am

    I will believe it's safe when I see him take a big ol' chug.

  4. Sheldon
    October 2nd, 2008 at 12:02 pm

    Organic just means that it contains carbon.
    Please everyone, learn the meaning of words before you use them.

  5. Alex
    October 2nd, 2008 at 12:41 pm

    I think organic should mean containing the awesome "Thomas 2001 Electric Organ".

  6. SenorMysterioso
    October 2nd, 2008 at 12:41 pm

    in a pinch, just lobbing a real skunk at someone is just as effective

  7. NicoNico
    October 2nd, 2008 at 1:00 pm

    Oh, bleh. Bleh bleh bleh. That sounds disturbing, and I'd never drink that! Bleh.

    Sorry, but bleh.

  8. ted
    October 2nd, 2008 at 1:11 pm

    What's the point? Tracking em down later? It probably won't defuse the immediate situation.

    Gotta love the first two comments: the trolls are feeding on each other now?

  9. Justin
    October 2nd, 2008 at 1:32 pm

    I don't know ted. If you were surrounded by a smell so rancid you wanted to or were puking your guts out. It might put a damper on your enthusiasm.

    That said, this kind of stuff always seems to get into the hands of those repressive regimes that just cant allow freedom of speech under their rule. But I guess it's better than being hosed with bullets.

  10. JamesB
    October 2nd, 2008 at 1:40 pm

    I wonder what your breath is like after you drink it.

  11. Jean
    October 2nd, 2008 at 1:49 pm

    "That said, this kind of stuff always seems to get into the hands of those repressive regimes that just cant allow freedom of speech under their rule. But I guess it’s better than being hosed with bullets."

    Repressive regimes don't generally bother with non-lethal weapons...that's why they are 'repressive'.

    And it looks like commenter #1 is astroturfing for commenter #2.

  12. CheeseDuck
    October 2nd, 2008 at 2:51 pm

    "Organic" means that it contains BOTH hydrogen and carbon.

    But whatever.

  13. Thomas
    October 2nd, 2008 at 3:41 pm

    Sounds delicious.

  14. PancakeMan
    October 2nd, 2008 at 4:38 pm

    They finally harnessed the power of Big Mac secret sauce!

  15. Neatoramawontsendmeapassword
    October 2nd, 2008 at 4:54 pm

    That must be what the Bog of Eternal Stench is filled with.

  16. Jeremy
    October 2nd, 2008 at 5:44 pm

    You can even drink it?

    Oh you know the officier manning the water cannon is totally gonna be aiming for people's mouths.

  17. Tom
    October 2nd, 2008 at 6:36 pm

    Nonlethal weapons are really a horrible invention. They turn democracies into police states very quickly. How, you ask?

    Simple. Because it won't kill the civilian (and that is inevitably who it is used against, citizens), police tend to use it more and more often, for lesser and lesser reasons. Eventually, they are used as punishment, again, for lesser and lesser reasons. See the abuse of tasers in the US.

    This kind of thing should only be used on the battlefield. Civilians, no matter how belligerent, shouldn't be subject to such attacks. Either shoot them or arrest them. Don't punish people without a trial.

  18. Web
    October 3rd, 2008 at 7:53 pm

    Justin--Great insight into the Middle East. It is a shame that a repressive regime such as Israel developed this weapon. Much better if some of those more progressive regimes such as Syria, Iran, Egypt, Saudi Arabia, or Lybia had developed it. Those pesky Israelis! Imagine, trying to find a less lethal or injurious way of controlling unruly mobs! Let's get the UN involved, shall we? I think the security council should take this one up. Maybe we can get the World Court involved too!

    Web


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