The Secret to a Great Marriage: Being Quiet!

Women: Forget sharing your feelings or getting your husband to share his. The secret to a great marriage is ... being quiet and having sex instead! (Okay, the last part is sort of a dodge but keep on reading ...)

Forget everything you've heard about frankness, sharing your feelings, getting him to express his. New research into the male mind makes it clear that discussion may be the fastest way to shut down communication. (Oh, you noticed that, have you?) [...]

"The number one myth about relationships is that talking helps. The truth is, more often than not, it makes things worse," says Love, a tall, lean redhead with a down-home Texas twang and a generous smile. She is co-founder of the Austin Family Institute and leads workshops around the country when she isn't making television appearances or co-writing books, including the best-selling "Hot Monogamy."

"Talking about feelings, which is soothing to women, makes men physically uncomfortable," says Stosny, the Maryland-based author of "You Don't Have to Take It Anymore" and an expert on male aggression. "There's literally more blood flow to their muscles. They get fidgety, and women think they're not listening."

Link - Thanks Tiffany!


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I think it all depends on the relationship and the couple. Yes, men and women communicate differently. All couples are different, too! What will work for one couple will not work for another. I know couples who say they are "best friends." They say they can talk about anything. My husband has two problems. First of all he can't express himself emotionally and second, he can't deal with my emotions either. If something just has to be said, I'll drop the bomb when I feel like the moment is right. I find that he is happier, which leads to us being happier as couple, when I just give it up. I accommodate him whenever he wants sex. He is happy if he is satisfied. If he is happy, we are all happy.
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david b-- you're right, and i would attribute that to the feminist movement. a lot of feminists think women deserve better treatment than men because of the damage done in the past, which is an exact contradiction to their cause. then again, you're putting all the blame on women, and relationships take TWO people to make it work. if you allow your spouse to walk all over you, it isn't just their fault for taking you for granted; it is also your fault for letting them. weak men seek women with strong personalities, and vice-versa. if you have a strong personality and are with someone also with a strong personality, there is likely going to be a power struggle and it is 100% up to you whether you want to put up with it. if you feel immasculated, you have every right to get out of the relationship and find a dumb bimbo to walk all over. or you can just suck it up and work on the existing relationship.
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Johnny Lynn, you can be a bit more mature, BY NOT TYPING ALL IN CAPS LIKE A 12 YEAR OLD!.
That being said, the non-secret of a very long relationship, married or otherwise, is mutual respect and unconditional love. Emphasis on "unconditional".
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