Letter from School: Your Kid is Fat

1. anon
   September 2nd, 2008 at 2:04 pm

   They're not fat, they're 'metabo' - http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/13/world/asia/13fat.html

2. Neatoramawontsendmeapassword
   September 2nd, 2008 at 2:35 pm

   And if they're actually *gasp* underweight, what then? They'll be forced to eat cafeteria crap until they catch up with their peers?

3. Lemons
   September 2nd, 2008 at 3:17 pm

   @NWSMAP: You seem to be forgetting that none of the children-- obese, underweight, standard-- will be "forced" to do anything at all about their results. All this study does is officially inform parents where their child's BMI (vaguely) lies on a sliding scale. No more, no less.

   Since luckily I'm in before the first "BMI is flawed" comment, let me say this: yes, BMI is really just a rule of thumb that can be useful for the average body type. Super-buff people may lie on the overweight-to-obese end of that scale, but really it doesn't make much of a difference in this case. If you're the parent of a ten-year-old bodybuilder (not likely), you likely know enough about your child's health and fitness level to disregard a misleading result spewed forth from a simple weight-to-height ratio.

4. awh
   September 2nd, 2008 at 3:26 pm

   Fat kid = Spoiled kid that mommmy thinks of as their lil pweshus, and therefore gets everything they want. Even tubs of fried chicken and "mighty kid" meals at McDonalds.

   My own parents let us kids eat anything and everything. And yes, we were terribly spoiled, and literally ruined with love. My brother was allowed to have a horrible diet, with the excuse that he was a "picky eater".

   Thanx mom n dad. Idiots.

   Parents that let their kids get to this stage obviously lack the backbone to do whats right for their kids. instead of enforcing and establishing appropriate habits... they do whats easy. Allowing junior to stuff his face with Captain crunch because he throws a tantrum otherwise.
   How will a note from school change anything? These parents are just taking the easy path of least resistance.

5. Dianne
   September 2nd, 2008 at 3:28 pm

   I remember the big weigh in at school when I was going up. I was just a little overweight, but since I wasn't the same weight as my friends I felt like a freak and usually would end up crying because the teacher would say the weight out loud. I would not put a kid of mine through this torture, and if I knew a public weighing was going to be held I would be sure my kid did not have to go through it - skinny or fat.

6. marc
   September 2nd, 2008 at 3:36 pm

   When I was a kid we were told to jump up and down (in our underpants) in front of the school nurse; if we wobbled too much, then our parents were told we were too fat. I wobbled a lot.....and I still do. Merely pointing out obesity does not in it itself solve the problem.

7. Orjan Morjan
   September 2nd, 2008 at 3:43 pm

   @Dianne
   When was this? 1912?

   Doing that publicly today wouldn't be tolerated. Thank goodness.

8. anon
   September 2nd, 2008 at 4:00 pm

   "Parents that let their kids get to this stage obviously lack the backbone to do whats right for their kids."

   ...Spoken by someone with no parenting experience.

   Sometimes you have to pick your battles.

9. Evil Pundit
   September 2nd, 2008 at 6:30 pm

   @Lemons -- Forcing them to 'eat right' is the next stage.

10. proud papa
    September 2nd, 2008 at 6:40 pm

    They've been doing that at our school in PA for as long as I can remember. We get a letter informing us of our child's BMI. I have one son who is on the fat side of the BMI and another that is on the skinny side. They are two years apart and eat the exact same meals, with almost the exact same portions. Not all kids are fat because they eat whatever they want...some kids just are. The doctor tells us not to worry about it, they'll even out in a few years.

    I don't have a problem with the BMI thing, but I don't need it to tell me that one of my kids is skinny and the other is fat.

11. Sammy
    September 2nd, 2008 at 6:49 pm

    BMI isnt a very acurate system anymore.
    It takes your height and weight and age and plugs them into a chart.
    My BMI says Im slightly over weight, while my doctor says Im slghtly underweight.
    It doesnt take muscle into account.

    And I think this is a good idea. If you look at someone everyday you dont really realize theyre weight, especially if you love them

12. Dianne
    September 2nd, 2008 at 6:53 pm

    Hi Orjan: It was about 1958!! Yea, it was awful but I'm okay now!!!! Good or bad it didn't keep me away from the Dairy Queen.

13. Top 10 Celebrity's
    September 2nd, 2008 at 6:56 pm

    Sometimes you have to pick your battles.

14. Courageous Grace
    September 3rd, 2008 at 12:07 am

    Reminds me of when our insurance company required us to take a health survey for hubby to keep his premium down (required by the company he works for...very illegal the way they did it but there wasn't much we could do) and the end result for me was that I was morbidly obese and should be drinking a glass of wine every day.

    I was eight months pregnant at the time. This survey obviously didn't take that into account even though I selected the "pregnant" option.

    Yes, I'm overweight, but not THAT much overweight, and I'm short. I'm the type of person that really does have big bones, wide hips, and big boobs. I've got big feet and wide shoulders, too. My BMI has always indicated I am obese even when I wore a size 6. *sigh* I miss my hourglass figure. oops, I'll stop rambling now...

15. Sweet Violet
    September 3rd, 2008 at 3:35 am

    One of the major flaws in this, to my mind, is that the letters to the parents apparently give no clues what to do about the problem. I didn't need a letter from the school to tell me one of my children was overweight...I'm neither stupid nor blind. What would have been helpful is some resources for a remedy that would not create an eating disorder or make my child feel singled out from his thin sibs who could eat anything in any quantity.

    Additionally, the person spearheading this in the UK come across as an incredibly obtuse and offensive fellow who doesn't care if his message alienates the parents or emotionally damages the children: parents who are alienated will not heed the message; emotionally wounded children may well become further obese through comfort eating.

    The original "A View from the Other Side" blog post is at http://sweetvioletsa.blogspot.com/2008/08/its-officialyoure-fat.html

16. David B
    September 3rd, 2008 at 7:07 am

    No parent, or the kid themselves, needs to be told that they are fat. This is just another attempt by the people in power, real or imagined, to tell everyone that they know what's best for the general public. Are there overweight kids? Of course. Are ther underweight kids? Of course. Everybody is different and we as a society need to recognize that some people are always going to be over weight and that is not necessarily from excessive eating. Haven't we all seen people that can eat anything and everything and not be fat? Haven't we all see other people that seem to gain weight from an average diet? People are different and their bodies react differently to food. When my brother was 18 he was 5'7" tall and weighed 92lbs. When I was 18 I was 6'1" and weighed 200lbs. He never liked food that much and I never met a food I didn't like.

17. S
    September 3rd, 2008 at 9:42 am

    The title is a little misleading, since it is an "opt-in" sort of thing. I can sort of see the benefit if someone can't go to the doctor to get their kids' BMI measured, I guess. But I have to agree with most of the above comments that a lot of the time parents have a pretty good idea whether their kid is fat or not... also, a lot of kids are chubby in elementary and middle school, especially if they are particularly stout and barrel-chested or if they are due for a serious growth spurt in later years. I have a friend who was chubby all over in middle school, but right around his sophomore year he suddenly shot up to 6 foot 8. Just sayin'.

18. taboman
    September 3rd, 2008 at 10:18 am

    hmm... in singapore they have something similar to this but are slightly blunter about it. they send a twice yearly report to all parents about their child's weight for height ratio, followed by the option(usually compulsory) to join a 'fun' co-curricular activity called trim and fit club, which if you reverse the order of the letters say FAT club. so as one can easily imagine life was tougher then. but i found it alright, strangely enough.

19. jangaboo
    September 3rd, 2008 at 10:45 am

    MOre pressures by society on how to be and conform to it

    if you don't conform you get labeled bad

    1984 IS HERE! its just prettier looking and not as bleak, if it was so bleak it would be obvious and we'd stand up for this

    Being fat isn't healthy but there's so many guidelines now with smoking (I'm not a smoker either) on how someone should be and if they aren't part of those guidelines they are heretics...or aren't normal like rest of the robots

20. MoniA
    September 3rd, 2008 at 11:03 am

    Kids will eat healthy food if that is all you provide for them. They'll get hungry and they'll enjoy it. I know this from experience.

21. Sweet Violet
    September 3rd, 2008 at 1:37 pm

    MoniA---unfortunately, parents are not the sole providers of food to children. Kids swap their lunches with other kids, they buy treats on the way home from school and even in vending machines at school. Their friends homes are great grazing grounds, as are the cupboards and refrigerators at home when Mom's not looking. One of my teenaged sons ate an entire bowl of leftover spaghetti for an "afternoon snack," while I was downstairs doing the laundry!

    Children, unfortunately, do not always respond in the way we would prefer them to: if you provide nothing but "healthy food," they'll just cadge cookies and sweets from the mothers of their friends.

22. Neatoramawontsendmeapassword
    September 3rd, 2008 at 2:07 pm

    To those who keep saying "pick your battles": Are you really that dumb/lazy, or do you have obese children and are too ashamed to admit that you screwed up? If you're going to be picking your battles, shouldn't setting up good eating habits and ensuring your child's future health be at the very top of the list? If that's not the battle you pick, what is?

23. Blacknimbus
    September 3rd, 2008 at 2:25 pm

    "Are you really that dumb/lazy, or do you have obese children and are too ashamed to admit that you screwed up? "

    The school shouldn't be bothering with this nonsense. It's unrelated to instruction and best left to parents. If bad parenting is a problem, I'd say the government intervention is a poor response.

24. MoniA
    September 3rd, 2008 at 4:24 pm

    I do agree that telling parents that their kids are overweight will not help.

    Sweet Violet, I see what you are saying but personally I haven't found that to be the case. I know grownups who stil eat the healthy vegan diets that their parents raised them too. Yes there are bad influences out there but overall we can make a difference by train our kids right. I'm a firm believer in that. I also homeschool but my kids spend days away with their friends sometimes. What I don't like is how kids are taught that they need to snack,snack,snack,snack,snack all the time. That's a little hard for my kids because we don't eat in between meals. Our stomachs need a rest, not to be constantly working. We also don't watch TV so they are commercial free most of the time. I rent and check out programs from the library for them to watch.

25. Snerd
    September 3rd, 2008 at 8:55 pm

    Another government intrusion, and another way they are slinking in on peoples' lives to gain MORE control.

26. MoonCake
    September 6th, 2008 at 4:21 pm

    a lot of being overweight these days (in addition to lack of activity) has to do with all the preservatives and additives in the foods themselves. people who aren't as well off have to buy cheaper food, both in price and quality, and are generally "more" obese than those with higher incomes. what i'm trying to say is, it's not as easy for some people to get healthy food. children who are overweight most likely have overweight parents, so it's not just "your child needs to excercise" it's "your entire family needs to change their eating habits." which is an entirely different problem in itself.. something the government can try to solve until their eyes bleed with no results. good luck, UK.

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