Archive for May 3rd, 2008
Dog Survives 8 Days Under Rubble
Good Times Adventures employee Brian Mislansky and his dog Lulu were the only ones inside the business’ building in Breckenridge, Colorado when an explosion caused it to collapse. Mislansky was rescued four hours later and was hospitalized. He is expected to recover from his injuries. Lulu was found eight days later! Building owner Brian Holt heard a whimper as he was looking through the rubble. He called out Lulu’s name and heard her yelping.
It took Lulu’s rescuers nearly an hour to dig down to her. The dog was huddled 15 feet down, in a crawl space.
“She basically had a two-story building on top of her,” Holt told the newspaper.
Lulu was checked by a veterinarian who said she was remarkably well, suffering only mild dehydration and some trauma to her left eye.
The springer spaniel was later taken to visit Mislansky in the hospital. The cause of the explosion is under investigation. Link -via Two Kitties and a Puppy
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Wrongcards
Wrongcards are ecards that say things normal ecards don’t. Like “Get well soon, because I’m not going back to jail for necrophilia” and “four out of five mental health professionals agree that i’m no danger to anybody.” They also have some lovely Mothers Day ecards, like the oh so sentimental one you see here. Link -via Shiny Shiny
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A Bride Named Amy
(Metacafe link)
When Brad and Amy got married, her friends and family put together an elaborate production number as a toast, totally without her knowledge.
We are not sure how this was kept secret by everyone involved but it was truly an incredible production. Check out Amy’s utter shock when people start springing up from the crowd to join in the fun in this heartwarming tribute to Amy and Brad on their special day…
And it was all captured on video. Link -Thanks, PAgent!
Update: Thanks to zondron for the Metacafe link!
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Shy Child plays Musical Chairs live
New York-based band Shy Child plays a game of musical chairs on-stage live with fashion models at the Fashion Rocks 2007 exhibition. Cool band, cool tune, cool video. YouTube.
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Impossible smells exhibition opens
As reported by Telegraph.co.uk, scent professionals of many stripes were tapped for the “extinct and impossible” smells exhibition at the Reg Vardy Gallery, University of Sunderland in the northeast of England. They’ve created a series of unique historical odors that would likely not exist naturally today. Scents include odors found a medieval plague doctor’s first aid kit, the smell of the fallout from an atomic bomb, the sweaty stink of a space station, the bouquet of extinct flowers and more. I wish the exhibition was showing here in the northeast of the US as well. Update: Here’s more from 24 Hour Museum.
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Max Knight's Walking Bike
Can you walk your bike and ride it at the same time? You can with Max Knight’s "Walking Bike." Instead of tires, Max uses 8 pairs of sneakers, complete with black ankle socks!
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World's Most Expensive Home: $2 Billion Skyscraper!
When the Ambani residence is finished next year, it will be the most expensive home in the world: a 27-story skyscraper in downtown Mumbai. The cost? $2 billion!
But the Ambani family can well afford it, because Mukesh Ambani, head of India’s petrochemical giant Reliance Industries, is the fifth richest man in the world and is worth $43 billion.
Forbes has the story:
The home will cost more than a hotel or high-rise of similar size because of its custom measurements and fittings: A hotel or condominium has a common layout, replicated on every floor, and uses the same materials throughout the building (such as door handles, floors, lamps and window treatments).
The Ambani home, called Antilla, differs in that no two floors are alike in either plans or materials used. At the request of Nita Ambani, say the designers, if a metal, wood or crystal is part of the ninth-floor design, it shouldn’t be used on the eleventh floor, for example. The idea is to blend styles and architectural elements so spaces give the feel of consistency, but without repetition.
Antilla’s shape is based on Vaastu, an Indian tradition much like Feng Shui that is said to move energy beneficially through the building by strategically placing materials, rooms and objects.
Link | Photo Gallery – via Growabrain
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Quote: H.L. Mencken on Conscience
"Conscience is the inner voice which warns us that someone may be looking."
– H.L. Mencken, journalist and satirist
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Baby Monkey Cuddles with Teddy Bear
Conchita, a 3-week-old white-naped mangabey monkey, couldn’t see her mother because she was recovering from a caesarean (I didn’t know monkeys could get a caesarean, but there it is!).
So, to make sure that Conchita doesn’t miss her mommy, zookeepers gave her a teddy bear to cuddle with!
The Daily Mail has photos so sugary cute they’ll rot your teeth! Link – via J-Walk blog
(Photo: Fiona Hanson / PA)
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LOLBrimley: Cats That Look Like Wilford Brimley
Gato Island found not one, but five cats that look amazingly like Wilford Brimley. Behold, here are the LOLBrimleys: Link – via Cynical-C
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The Deadly Sport of Nigerian Boxing
No Marquess of Queensberry rules here … This is Dembe, a brutal and sometimes deadly Nigerian boxing:
"Before the bout starts, the boxer will wet the flax cord wrapped around his hand and cover it in sand to maximize the pain he can infict. Wrapped inside his fist are small animal skin packets containing bird feathers or other charms the boxer believes protect him."
BBC News has a fascinating photo gallery of the sport: Link – via Look at This
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World's Longest Foosball Table
As an ad gimmick for Amstel Beer, Airworks built this XXL foosball table to accomodate 2 entire soccer teams (22 players): Link – via Gizmodo
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Captain Jack Sparrow LEGO Bust
"Captain Jack Sparrow is like a cross between Keith Richards and Pepé Le Pew"
- Johnny Depp, Pirates of the Caribbean actor
That’s Craig Steven’s super-neat LEGO bust of Johnny Depp as Captain Jack Sparrow of the Pirates of the Caribbean movie!
Links: Captain Jack Sparrow | William Shatner | Freddie Mercury LEGO busts – via The Brothers Brick
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The Aliens of Calgary
Did aliens just landed in western Canada? Some people have reportedly seen striking images of aliens on the wall of a Calgary home:
"I looked out and I thought, ‘Oh my gosh, I’ve lost my mind,’" resident Karen Henuset said of the first time she saw the specters. "So I asked our nanny to come and take a look at this, and the hair on her arms just stood straight up."
It’s as "clear as day. You see two eyes on each of them, they both have this little thing over their head. It’s a little weird," said resident Reid Henuset.
Link – via Boing Boing
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Trivia: Philematology
Philematology is the art or science of kissing.
The origin of the word kiss comes from Old English cyssan ("to kiss"), which transformed into the Middle English kissen before becoming the word as we know it today.
Anthropologists think that kissing evolved from grooming behavior or as a result of mothers premasticating (chewing) food for their children. Others think that kissing allowed prospective mates to sniff and taste each other’s pheromones for biological compatibility.
To avoid clashing their noses, couples turn their faces slightly to one side when kissing. In 2003, Onur Güntürkün observed that most couples turn their head to the right – by a ratio of 2:1 – when kissing in public (like while bidding goodbyes at airports). He noted that it’s similar to a baby’s preference for turning the head to the right during the final weeks of gestation and for the first few months after birth.
The human mouth is full of bacteria. When you kiss someone, you exchange anywhere between 10 million and 1 billion bacteria.
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Spam Turns 30
On May 3, 1978, Gary Thuerk, a marketer with the Digital Equipment Corporation, sent the very first spam e-mail to 393 Arpanet users. You can read the actual e-mail and its consequences at the link.
Image via Flickr user eurleif (R)
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Crust, Mantle, Peanut Butter?
We all learned it growing up – The Earth’s crust is made up of three distinct layers: Core, mantle, and crust. Unfortunately, as with other simplistic theories like the tongue map, scientists have recently discovered that the real world is a bit more complicated:
One clue to the new thinking is that seismic waves traveling through the planet have long been measured to travel at inexplicably different speeds. Sharp speed changes suggest differing materials. On each side of the planet there are two big, chemically distinct, dense piles or blobs of material that are hundreds of kilometers thick – one beneath the Pacific and the other below the Atlantic and Africa, the researchers say.
“You can picture these piles like peanut butter,” McNamara said. “It is solid rock, but rock under very high pressures and temperatures becomes soft like peanut butter, so any stresses will cause it to flow.”
Hit the Link at LiveScience to find out more, or check out the full article at Science (subscription required)
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That's not Michigan
Fantastic "frozen wave" photos like this one have circulated on the internet to illustrate the 2008 Michigan cold snap. The accompanying text says they were taken in Macinaw City on Lake Huron. The photos are real, says Snopes, but the text is a hoax. The photos are from Antarctica, Dumont d’Urville Station, not Michigan, and the wavelike effect is caused when ice is lifted up and exposed by glaciation, then sculpted by extreme winds. Photo credit: Tony Travouillon (2002).
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Thai dog rescue!
My sister-in-law sent these photos from Bangkok. These two kids were spotted rescuing a small dog that was stuck in an aqueduct. Innovation and pluck! I love Thailand. [Flickr set]
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10 Insulting Words You Should Know
There is a crisis of insults on the Web. On one hand, the volume of flames is very high yet the quality is poor. Gone are the days of the razor-sharp wit of Oscar Wilde and Winston Churchill*, only to be replaced by a string of four letter words typed in ALL CAPS by n00bs (the latest of which is “FAIL”, itself a failure of coming up with a more scathing insult, if you think about it).
*For example:
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go," says Oscar Wilde.
George Bernard Shaw wrote to Winston Churchill, "I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend....if you have one." And Churchill wrote back, "Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second......if there is one"
Well, it’s hard to teach wit - but all of us can learn the next best thing: the approximation of it by obfuscation, i.e. using big, difficult, and obscure words. So, to do our part in improving the quality of insults on teh Interweb, Neatorama has come up with a list of 10 Insulting Words You Should Know:
1. FRENCHIFY (v)
Definition:
1) To make French in quality or trait 2) To make somewhat effeminate,
and 3) To contract a veneral disease (a 19th century slang).
Analysis: We have the English to thank for this word. Most people implicitly understand that it means to become more like the French, but not a lot know the second or the third meaning. We’re still not sure which is more insulting.
2. BESCUMBER (v)
Definition:
To spray with poo.
Analysis: Actually bescumber is just one of many words in the English language that basically mean “to spray with poo”. These are: BEDUNG, BERAY, IMMERD, SHARNY, and the good ol’ SHITTEN. In special cases, you can use BEMUTE (specifically means to drop poo on someone from great height), SHARD-BORN (born in dung), and FIMICOLOUS (living and growing on crap).
Alternative: If that is too vulgar, you can use BEVOMIT and BEPISS, which meanings should be obvious to you, as well as BESPAWL (to spit on).
Oh, and if you want to say poo without looking like you're saying it, you can use ORDURE, DEJECTION, and EXCRETA. To mean something more specific, you can use MECONIUM (first feces of a newborn child), MELAENA or MELENA (the abnormally tarry feces containing blood from gastrointestinal bleeding), LIENTERY (diarrhea with undigested or partially digested food), and STEATORRHEA (fatty stool that's hard to flush down).
Here are some words along the same line that may one day prove to be useful for you: TURDIFY (turn into turd), COPROPHAGIA (eating of feces [wiki]), and COPROPHILIA (Think 2 Girls 1 Cup [wiki - don't worry, SWF], if you don't know what this is, I shan't corrupt you any further).
Let's end entry number two with these two amazing words COPREMESIS and MISERERE, both of which mean fecal vomiting. Yes, fecal vomiting. It's a medical emergency caused by the obstruction of the bowel (source).
3. MICROPHALLUS (n)
Definition:
An unusually small penis.
Analysis: Self explanatory.
Alternative: Insulting a man’s private part is a very reliable way to put him down (if he’s smaller than you) or to get beat up (if he’s larger than you). Usually, even a dimwit can decipher the meaning of this word, after all, it’s just a combination of “micro” and “phallus”.
So, to insult a physically larger opponent, we recommend you use these words instead: PHALLOCRYPSIS (retraction or shrinkage of the penis), CRYPTORCHID (undescendend testicles), and PHALLONCUS (tumor of the penis).
4. COCCYDYNIA (n)
Definition:
Pain in the butt.
Analysis: It's a real medical term: coccydynia is pain in the coccyx or tailbone. Most people simply call it "buttache."
Similar: PROCTALGIA, PROCTODYNIA, PYGALGIA and RECTALGIA all mean pain in the butt.
Alternative: CERVICALGIA (pain in the neck), PHALLODYNIA or PHALLALGIA (both mean pain in the penis), and PUDENDAGRA (pain in the genitals).
The word "butt" is highly versatile in its vernacular use - you can say "butt face" or "hairy butt" - dem are fightin' words - but it's much better to use these instead: ANKYLOPROCTIA (stricture of the anus, the state of "tight-assity"), STEATOPYGOUS (fat-assed), DASYPYGAL (having hairy buttocks), and CACOPYGIAN (having ugly buttocks).
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5. NINNYHAMMER (n)
Definition:
A fool or a silly person.
Analysis: The word "fool," unless you're Mr. T, is sometimes
woefully inadequate to express the stupidity of the person you're talking
about. So use Ninnyhammer. Or at least NINNY.
Alternative: The English language is chockful of colorful words meaning stupid person, such as: DUMMKOPF, IGNORAMUS, JOBBERNOWL, GOWK, and WITLING.
For mental retardation, eschew the ubiquitous 'tard - rather, use AMENTIA (extreme mental retardation because of inadequate brain tissue), CRETINISM (mental retardation associated with dwarfism, caused by the deficiency of a thyroid hormone, a person with cretinism is a CRETIN), and MORONITY (used to mean mild retardation of having a mental age of 7 to 12 years, now it's an obsolete term though we still use the word moron).
6. BUNCOMBE (n)
Definition:
A ludicrously false statement. Basically it means bullshit or nonsense.
Analysis: Actually, you probably already know this word by its more common spelling: bunkum.
The origin of this word is fascinating. In 1819, a North Carolina congressman, the Honorable Felix Walker, was giving a rambling speech with little relevance to the current debate. He refused to yield the floor, and claimed that he wasn't speaking for Congress but instead "for Buncombe" (a county in North Carolina he represented). That's all it took.
Over time, the spelling changed to "bunkum," and the meaning strangely changed to be "excellent." Then it changed back in 1870, when a San Francisco gambler introduced a new game "banco" played with dice that were later found out to be loaded. Sure enough, BUNCO became known to mean swindle or cheat, and bunkum reverted back to its original meaning. (Source)
The word DEBUNK came directly from this: it's just bunk(um) with the prefix de- (meaning to remove).
7. HIRCISMUS (n)
Definition:
Offensive armpit odor.
Analysis: Hircismus comes from the root word "hircus"
which means goat in Latin. Someone must have thought smelly pits smelled
like goats. Actually, this word combines two sources of great insult potential:
smelly and armpits. Why this is not used more often in the discourse of
hateful communication is beyond me.
Alternative: As we've mentioned, armpit is an untapped
goldmine for insults. Here are some examples of words you can use: MASCHALEPHIDROSIS
or MASCHALYPERIDROSIS (excessive sweating of the armpits). MASCHALOPHILOUS
(sexual attraction to the underarms) and AXILLISM (the use of armpit for
sex).
Smelling like goats is also a good source of insults (especially since goat is also a slang for a lecherous man). Try CAPRYLIC and HIRCINE (smelling like a pungent goat), and CAPRIC (resembling a goat).
8. CORPULENT (adj)
Definition:
Very fat.
Analysis: Good ol' fat is a reliable insult word. After all, nowadays, no one like a fatty ... except Mauritanian men. That's right: in the Islamic Republic of Mauritania, fat and Rubenesque women are sexy and desirable. So much so, that instead of the crash diet of the West, they have a similar but opposite program: crash feeding or "gavage," where girls as young as 5 years old are force-fed milk, cream, butter, couscous and other calorie-rich food:
Girls as young as 5 and as old as 19 had to drink up to five gallons of fat-rich camel’s or cow’s milk daily, aiming for silvery stretch marks on their upper arms. If a girl refused or vomited, the village weight-gain specialist might squeeze her foot between sticks, pull her ear, pinch her inner thigh, bend her finger backward or force her to drink her own vomit. In extreme cases, girls died. (Source)
Interestingly, the ideal man is skinny (Mauritanians view portly men as womanish and lazy).
Alternative: ABDOMINOUS (potbellied), STEATOPYGOUS (fat-assed), and FUSSOCK (a very fat woman).
9. FEIST or FICE (n)
Definition:
1) A small dog of uncertain ancestry, a mongrel. 2) A person of little
worth or someone with a bad temper, and 3) Silent fart.
Analysis: You actually already know this word: feist
is used throughout the Midland and Southern United States to mean a snappy,
nervous and belligerent little dog. The adjective feisty which
means "full of spirit or spunky," comes from this word. But
that's not why it's on this list (hint: #3!)
What you may not know is the true origin of the word. Feist comes from the Middle English fisten, which means to break wind (fist originally also meant flatus or fart). Feist is a special type of fart: the silent (and often deadly) type. Oh, and the word "fart" itself comes from another Middle English word farten or ferten, which in turn is from the Old English feortan.
Feist is the type of word that, if introduced to young adolescents, no doubt would spark a lifelong interest in learning new words.
Alternative: Fart is another one of those goldmines of insults. To obfuscate what you really mean, use instead: FLATUOSITY (fart). Other gems: EPROCTOLAGNIAC (someone aroused by flatulence, his own or someone else's), CARMINATIVE (something that makes you fart), and BDOLOTIC (prone to farting).
10. CACAFUEGO (n)
Definition:
A swaggering braggart or boaster.
Analysis: Cacafuego literally means "shit fire"
in Spanish. Anyone who boasts their new knowledge of insulting words from
this article can be called a cacafuego.
That's not the only interesting thing about it:
Cacafuego is also the nickname of a 16th century Spanish galleon captured by Sir Francis Drake (El Draque or The Dragon as he was known to his Spanish victims). The ship's original name was Nuestra Señora de la Concepción (Our Lady of Conception), but for some reason it's called by her sailors as "cagafuego" (fireshitter) or "cacafuego" (shitfire).
It was Drake's biggest plunder: it took his crew four days to transfer the cargo from the Cacafuego. In all, Drake got 80 pounds of gold, 26 tons of silver, 13 cases of silver coins, jewels, and more.
Synonym: BLATHERSKITE, BRAGGADOCIO, FANFARON, GASCONADER, and RODOMONTADE (English is full of this kind of word, though I think caca "shit fire" fuego is in a class of its own!)
REFERENCES
- Depraved
and Insulting English, a marvelous book by Peter Novobatzky and Ammon
Shea. Highly, highly recommended.
- The Free Dictionary
by Farlex
- Free Thesaurus by DonationCoder
(based on Grady Ward's Moby Thesaurus)
- Miriam-Webster Unabridged
Dictionary (it's behind a paywall)
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