World's Worst Lover: German Men!

Posted by Alex in Everything Else on December 12, 2007 at 11:36 am


Over 10,000 women from 50 countries were polled to find out who are the world’s worst lovers. The winner?

1. Germans (selfish in bed)
2. Swedes (too quick)
3. Dutch (too rough)
4. Americans (too dominant) – really? not "too fat?"
5. Welshmen (soppy)
6. Scots (too loud)

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27 comments to "World's Worst Lover: German Men!"

  1. Withheld
    December 12th, 2007 at 11:51 am

    Yeah, American men...

    1. too fat
    2. too stupid
    3. too shallow

    I say we all go to England to find cute guys with cute accents.

  2. anonymous
    December 12th, 2007 at 12:00 pm

    Japanese men:

    endowed with smallest "purple dragons"

    nation-wide preoccupation with prepubescent girls

    require all women to be submissive to males (except in anime where the heroine is a badass-yet-non-sexual she-wolf)

    of course, this could be all overly stereotypical, but read Mishima's analysis of his countrymen...oh, and watch any number of anime or read pretty much any manga that support the above.

  3. cuimhne
    December 12th, 2007 at 12:05 pm

    Irish men are the third best? he he

  4. Abestar
    December 12th, 2007 at 12:07 pm

    Uh the English were voted tenth worst for being chubby. Why not read the story next time ya disenchanted American bitch.

    On another note, did anyone think it was weird that all those top countries are Germanic or have large Germanic ethnically/or in language populations?

    The idea is flawed anyway since it ignores that idea that different countries might have more demanding women. Lets have a new poll to see where the most stuck up bitchy women are, I think the numbers would be quite similar to this one.

  5. Geekazoid
    December 12th, 2007 at 12:38 pm

    I knew from the subject alone, before reading the comments, that someone would post an insulting blurb about japanese/asian males. Par for the course!

  6. Mr. Binky
    December 12th, 2007 at 12:54 pm

    sixth post!

  7. SiteSeer
    December 12th, 2007 at 12:59 pm

    anon, spreading the love (or anti-love) 'round the world. When a poll about the worst western lovers gets released, by all means, include the worst stereotypes of eastern men to take some pressure off and maybe deflect some bad attention away. /groan

  8. Joh
    December 12th, 2007 at 1:03 pm

    Seems like I'm going to have to go for some Welsh/American/Russian loving dominant hairy man.

  9. Denita TwoDragons
    December 12th, 2007 at 1:14 pm

    "Withheld Says:
    December 12th, 2007 at 11:51 am

    Yeah, American men…

    1. too fat
    2. too stupid
    3. too shallow

    I say we all go to England to find cute guys with cute accents."

    You go on ahead, Withheld. I'm staying here with my lean, considerate, 160-IQ husband with the smokingly gorgeous Cajun accent, thanks.

    --TwoDragons

  10. Ian
    December 12th, 2007 at 2:37 pm

    After the gratuitous "fat american" joke, its all pretty funny. Im sure the English men would appreciate Withheld's slutty American ass in England. Im sure going all the way to England for cute guys with cute accents qualifies her as NOT shallow, like American men. What an idiot.

  11. Vonskippy
    December 12th, 2007 at 3:29 pm

    Yeah, I'm number one, I'm number one!

    //when most Deutsch women are like Heidi Klum in leather, it's not so much selfishness but self preservation.

  12. badiuk
    December 12th, 2007 at 4:58 pm

    Polish: too good ;)

  13. ptinfrance
    December 12th, 2007 at 6:25 pm

    what about french men? DON'T say "too dirty" ;-)

  14. just a guy
    December 12th, 2007 at 10:15 pm

    5. Welshmen (soppy)

    What's 'soppy'? Let's check the internetz! :
    sop·py: –adjective, -pi·er, -pi·est. 1. soaked, drenched, or very wet, as ground.
    2. rainy, as weather.
    3. British Slang. excessively sentimental; mawkish.

    SO are they wet, or 'mawkish' ?

  15. JJ
    December 13th, 2007 at 12:28 am

    Whoa there Withheld at #1:

    cute guys with cute accents? Ya mean ta tell me that ya thenk Geordie's a cute accent? Howz aboot Scouse, then eh?

    Let's not forget they've all got BAD TEETH. hahahaha

  16. Mindpimp
    December 13th, 2007 at 6:02 am

    Scotland and wales aren't countries, they're part of the UK.

  17. Abestar
    December 13th, 2007 at 6:41 pm

    @Mindpimp

    Not for long.....

  18. been to Germany
    July 30th, 2008 at 5:03 pm

    Yeah, I’m number one, I’m number one!

    //when most Deutsch women are like Heidi Klum in leather, it’s not so much selfishness but self preservation.

    Nice joke! German women are horrific! I cant tell from men and women!

  19. Nikki
    August 28th, 2008 at 6:46 pm

    Dutch too rough, Russians too hairy, Welsh too soppy, Scots too loud? Whats wrong with rough, hairy, soppy, and loud. Sounds sexy to me. Americans too fat? Depends on the age group, and there are more fat women here than men anyway. A little chunky, thats ok. I think these women should take a look at their selves. Do the men think these women are too hairy, too soppy, to quite or loud, too fat, too needy, too bitchy, too money or power hungry? Guess I'm not too judgmental. Just a chick from Chicago.

  20. GHenry
    October 2nd, 2008 at 7:57 am

    German are cute, nice eyes, blonde hair and so but it is true. when it comes in terms of sex or anything they are too methodicals. I have a friend who had a german boyfriend and they only had sex on thursdays every two weeks! She also told me that is was like a shedule: Oral sex him, oral sex her, doggy style a little and then normal position and Finish...until next thrusday!

    She also told me that altough he was very handsome and well endowed he was uncapable of understand subtle signs or "Hornyness" from her, the only way to know she was horny was if she just say: "I am horny" then he had to think it twice to fuck her because he only had sex every thursday...so he performed doll.

    If only germans were not so methodicals in everything. Time, schedule, rules...Aggght! So squared.

  21. Datingswiss
    February 27th, 2009 at 8:06 pm

    I think swiss are the best very romantic and pasinate not to metion the feel alot beter and i dont mind Germans either they are just as good

  22. aude
    March 21st, 2009 at 4:36 am

    i have had my ample share of various men from different ethnicities and my conclusion thus far would have to rate a german as being #1. it may sound incredulous and unbelievable but this one particular german is able to have sex 3-5 times a day daily! each session was not a quickie but a full fledge passionate love making session where he is emotionally and physically enjoying this sensual act. besides the frequency and his uninhibitedness, his technique and moves are unparalled. that's a lover! this german man needs nothing to be ready sexually....i suppose at the sight of me, he's ready to get it on anytime.

  23. Sexing a german
    April 6th, 2009 at 11:58 am

    i totally enjoyed sexing a german man.every time he sees me he wants me which makes me even more horny for him.i dont care who says what but german men,atleast my german man,is the best;on the couch,on the kitchen table,in the car and every night he is ready to have a go at me.

  24. victoria
    April 14th, 2009 at 1:53 am

    i dont really know about them. but german men are hot if they just be nice to girls...

  25. Goitse
    April 26th, 2009 at 12:31 am

    German men...the worst lovers? I DONT THINK SO.My German is totally amazing...he adores me and is always willing to try out new things.Whenever we see each other we can't keep our hands off each other...and he certainly cannot behave himself (in a good way).I totally love him.so if you think german men are the worst lovers look again for there are the few who ROCK in bed.

  26. anti-anonymous
    April 30th, 2009 at 5:39 pm

    i have 2 things
    1
    anonymous ... was that a refrence to kanokon? LOL

    and 2 AMARICAN GUYS RULE SCREW THE OVIOUSLY TOTALY TRUE
    POLS LMAO

    ok fine so we suck but we at least try.
    besides we shouldnt be judge people by there race
    i mean there are very horable wife beating lowlife bastard child white trash in amarica but... there are also sweet guys out there too and that goes for all contrys so why not just judge each person individualy cus this is some real racist crap right here!!!

  27. private. lol
    August 17th, 2009 at 10:50 pm

    Hi..I dont understand why all these racist remarks? There are nice people and bad people in every country. Judge by the individal..We have enough hate in the world..I've met bad and good American men and not all of them were fat. lol..I've also met good and bad German men..Not all of them are hot..I did meet a hot German guy, saw him off and on for 2 years and I think the sex would have been better if he was in love with me, but I'm kind of doubting he could love a American woman because of all the ridiculous stereotype spread around the world.. Why is a American woman a "slut" if she sleeps with a man shes not married to, but not a German woman? or Irish or whatever? Its these kind of statements that cause all the problems world wide..I know I cant change the world, but it does upset me to see and hear things like what is posted on here.. I kind of regretted looking at the site, but after reading it I had to say something..I was born in America but my family came here from "Switzerland" and to be honest Switzerland is one of the few countries where I have never met a bad man or heard bad things about. lol. Sorry if I've offended anyone with my words, but I think we all need to love, not hate..


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