Caption Monkey 14: Fat Coot!

Posted by Alex in Animal, Caption Monkey, Pictures on November 28, 2007 at 3:04 am



Photo: Chirpy UK [Flickr] - via Cute Overload

Whoa! I’ve been so busy with life/work/baby that I missed posting the Caption Monkey contest yesterday. But fret not, gentle readers, here it is.

The bird is a coot [wiki] - a particularly fat specimen of one, actually. Coots are named so because of their "coot" calls. No words whether those large toes help ‘em float on water.

Now, onto the contest. Ape Lad of Hobotopia has generously agreed to award a monkey (or any other animal) drawing to one lucky reader with the funniest caption.

Contest rules are darned simple: place your caption in the comment section below. One caption per comment, however you can submit as many funny ones as you can think of. You can also vote for your favorite caption, but not your own.

One last thing: Ape Lad is selling original Laugh-Out-Loud Cats comic for $20. Here’s your chance of getting one for Christmas!

Update 11/30/07 - congrats to RasmusJ #8 with the winning caption, picked by Ape Lad himself!

Harold wasn’t fond of bowling.



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COMMENT

73 comments to "Caption Monkey 14: Fat Coot!"

  1. tomfoolery
    November 28th, 2007 at 3:30 am

    i like big birds, and I cannot lie….

  2. Lorin
    November 28th, 2007 at 3:38 am

    Sadly, after fantastic results in testing, the ACME Duck Airbag Deployment Device was a catastrophic failure on the market.

  3. oxyacetylene
    November 28th, 2007 at 3:46 am

    I’ll be out in a minuite mom i got one hung!

  4. Roy Chong
    November 28th, 2007 at 4:00 am

    Note to self, ‘No more basketballs for lunch’

  5. Jonsend
    November 28th, 2007 at 5:39 am

    That’s no moon…

  6. Jonsend
    November 28th, 2007 at 5:48 am

    I’ll show those ostriches who can lay the biggest egg!

  7. Nestor
    November 28th, 2007 at 5:55 am

    You know, real coots have curves :D

  8. RasmusJ
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:31 am

    Harold wasn’t fond of bowling.

  9. Billy
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:34 am

    And here we have the elusive Brunswick Blackbird

  10. Dr. A
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:46 am

    Whaddya mean, coffee is a diuretic?

  11. Faz
    November 28th, 2007 at 7:32 am

    Oh Tyrone…You silly fat C**t

  12. b°b
    November 28th, 2007 at 7:47 am

    There’s a head coming out of my arse…

  13. farty
    November 28th, 2007 at 7:49 am

    come on, big fart!

  14. K!P
    November 28th, 2007 at 8:08 am

    *BUUR&*^*&^** swollod the burp :(

  15. Dan
    November 28th, 2007 at 8:21 am

    and here we see the wild COCO PUFF

  16. Mstryst YdBotum
    November 28th, 2007 at 8:23 am

    I’m bloated, my feet are wet and swollen and I have bird poop on my forehead… can this day get any worse??

  17. Jason Graley
    November 28th, 2007 at 8:27 am

    So Morgan Freeman blackballed me from this penguin flick…Said I couldn’t march.

  18. scott mccall
    November 28th, 2007 at 8:53 am

    I gotta go poopies!

  19. Harry
    November 28th, 2007 at 8:58 am

    I”m not fat I’m Big Boned.
    or
    I can’t believe I ate the whole thing.

  20. Mark
    November 28th, 2007 at 9:06 am

    Do these feathers make my butt look big?

  21. RasmusJ
    November 28th, 2007 at 9:16 am

    Harold was less than pleased when his spreading, pale patch earned him the nickname ‘Jacko’.

  22. RasmusJ
    November 28th, 2007 at 9:42 am

    Hhnnnnnnnggggghhhhh

  23. Steve
    November 28th, 2007 at 9:47 am

    I didn’t say I was a turkey…I said I ate too much turkey!

  24. RasmusJ
    November 28th, 2007 at 9:50 am

    can haz moldy bread?

  25. algonkin
    November 28th, 2007 at 9:51 am

    Hi… I’m Chubba!

    And I’m fat….
    My Mama’s fat,
    My Papa’s fat,
    Even my pet flea is fat.

    One day, Mama said…
    Chubba, can you smile under all that blubba?
    I said…why sure Moma!

  26. arvana
    November 28th, 2007 at 10:36 am

    I *told* you not to eat the blueberry gum!

  27. Andrew32
    November 28th, 2007 at 10:45 am

    This is why feeding birds alka seltzers is a bad idea.

    xD

    no, for real. they explode. O_o

  28. Doug C.
    November 28th, 2007 at 10:51 am

    “I am the Round Mound of Bird Down”.

  29. AnnaBee
    November 28th, 2007 at 10:56 am

    It wasn’t that Francine didn’t want to go bottom-feeding with the rest of the girls. She would have done anything to kick her partially webbed toes in the air while struggling to nip weeds from the slime-covered bottom of St. James’ Park’s lagoon. Her hideously inflated digestive tract was the issue. But little did Francine know that her rather embarassing intestinal gas problem was soon to become a potentially deadly affliction; it was the 3rd annual “Let Your Dogs Run Wild in the Park” day, and a sturdy bull mastiff had just taken a shine to the poor coot’s arousingly swollen hindquarters.

  30. Samantha
    November 28th, 2007 at 10:57 am

    Is my reflection deceptive, or have I gained weight?

  31. DrJones
    November 28th, 2007 at 10:58 am

    “Sure I was BIG enough, but they didn’t think I was ‘yellow’ enough for the role.”

  32. SarahW
    November 28th, 2007 at 11:01 am

    Concentratz and aks agin.

  33. EcoGeek
    November 28th, 2007 at 12:02 pm

    Tell me honestly, does this make me look fat?

  34. JoBo
    November 28th, 2007 at 12:02 pm

    Dang! This happens EVERY time it’s a little humid out!

  35. Jbone
    November 28th, 2007 at 12:13 pm

    A hush descended on the crowd at Cape Canaveral as the first natural-gas, jet-powered flight was about to commence.

  36. kickstand22
    November 28th, 2007 at 12:29 pm

    I wonder if they’ll know it’s a hair piece…

  37. unohav_1
    November 28th, 2007 at 12:39 pm

    I can’t believe I ate the whole thing.

  38. jazzk
    November 28th, 2007 at 1:41 pm

    “Someone get me some prune juice.”

  39. Pj
    November 28th, 2007 at 2:06 pm

    FRAN! FRAN THE WATER HEATER BLEW AGAIN!

  40. dan deluca
    November 28th, 2007 at 2:15 pm

    Yea Yea, I know….why don’t you try sitting around watching Oprah and eating bonbons all day and see what it does to you !

  41. dan deluca
    November 28th, 2007 at 2:18 pm

    ………….and National Geographic photographer “Bud” Johnson paused for a moment…. fondly remembering his adorable yet chubby wife waiting for him back home 5,000 miles away ….

  42. dan deluca
    November 28th, 2007 at 2:21 pm

    Despite his large size, Blackie the Coot was confident in his life knowing that his trophy coot wife would screw his brains out later that evening.

  43. Tdot
    November 28th, 2007 at 2:21 pm

    He can’t walk on water.
    That proves it, Jesus was not a fat coot.

  44. dan deluca
    November 28th, 2007 at 2:25 pm

    Viagra gone wrong

  45. emptyminded
    November 28th, 2007 at 2:54 pm

    Thinking no one would object to another crazy coot in his cabinet, President Bush today introduced his choice to replace his outgoing antiterrorism advisor.

  46. James Hackett
    November 28th, 2007 at 3:25 pm

    Missing: Wilson, Tom Hanks lovable co-star in 2000’s ‘Castaway’. Last seen floating somewhere in the sea.

  47. sheri
    November 28th, 2007 at 3:52 pm

    Atkins Schmatkins

  48. Cori
    November 28th, 2007 at 3:52 pm

    And we now present you with conclusive proof, coconuts are indeed migratory.

  49. Zen Blue
    November 28th, 2007 at 4:18 pm

    When the coot can’t poot… try Exlax.

  50. Dan Smith
    November 28th, 2007 at 5:24 pm

    “Ten Minutes to Wapner.”

  51. Dan Smith
    November 28th, 2007 at 5:26 pm

    “Have to get to K-Mart. 400 Oak Street. The sign said ‘Don’t Walk’. Have to get to K-Mart.”

  52. EDG
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:06 pm

    Would anyone give a hoot if someone placed their foot in a steel toed boot to swiftly kick this root eating, soot colored, coot for a lot of loot?

  53. EDG
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:06 pm

    “Right now, a bucket of Midol would be REALLY nice.”

  54. EDG
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:07 pm

    In an effort to curb the global greenhouse effect, Al Gore convinced this coot to never again toot.

  55. EDG
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:07 pm

    “Hey, I’m not fat! I’m just extremely fluffy.”

  56. EDG
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:07 pm

    “Flying is SO overrated. This year I’m going to roll south for the winter.”

  57. EDG
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:16 pm

    “To answer your stupid question: Yes, I am allergic to bee stings.”

  58. EDG
    November 28th, 2007 at 6:19 pm

    Iraqi terrorists have a new weapon of mass destruction. It’s a bird that emits numerous dirty bombs onto freshly washed cars.

  59. DB
    November 28th, 2007 at 7:16 pm

    Please be gentle.

  60. Will Perkins
    November 28th, 2007 at 7:28 pm

    Oh God….I just absorb it right through my feet!

  61. graham!
    November 28th, 2007 at 8:48 pm

    “Ladies and gentlemen, we here at the San Diego zoo have an important announcement for you, the press, on this sunny afternoon. Our captive breeding program, already a success with the Giant Pandas you know and love, have cross-bread a common coot, native to South America, with Star Jones. They will be hosting a new series on WTV later this year. We will take questions at this time”

  62. SarahW
    November 28th, 2007 at 11:53 pm

    Reply iz hazy, trys again
    if still not wrkin
    hitz wiz fishstiks

  63. MariV
    November 29th, 2007 at 12:15 am

    Calvin the Coot learns an important lesson: “…and I promise myself that I’ll never again take a dare to eat a live blowfish.”

  64. MariV
    November 29th, 2007 at 12:17 am

    Calvin the Coot meets Blimpy the Blowfish.

  65. RasmusJ
    November 29th, 2007 at 9:52 am

    Cute coot, nice suit!
    Awwww - bad snoot, clogged shute?

  66. SarahW
    November 29th, 2007 at 6:18 pm

    NO, I haznt seed ur bukkit.
    (hehe)

  67. Charanda de Cristo
    November 29th, 2007 at 11:11 pm

    Kwaneese, gurl, lets me tell you bout dese new shoes I done picked up at tha Wal-Mart. Gurl. You know I hads to go up in there and get me a new dress to wear to Shondricack’s momma’s cousin’s baby shower. Anyway. I had just got up on one of them ride-along carts - you know, cause I gots the elephant diseases - when I turn around there was these just FLY black and white sandals. I just threw them up on my buggy and paid for it with my food stamps. What color you think I need to paint my toenails?

  68. SarahW
    November 30th, 2007 at 10:19 am

    Inturnul bukkit R advantij

  69. SarahW
    November 30th, 2007 at 10:26 am

    next tiem werz teh swim dapurs

  70. SarahW
    November 30th, 2007 at 3:43 pm

    I finded u som popkorns
    but I eaded it.

  71. PristineApostle
    December 3rd, 2007 at 6:00 am

    “Yeah, I’m fat. So what? That’s just how I roll.”

  72. Josh Parker
    December 14th, 2007 at 2:34 pm

    Coot: 1
    Oil Spill: 0

  73. Kayla
    January 23rd, 2008 at 10:11 am

    dude this is nice i never seen nothing like it … i looks like a duck animal thing .

    but then again

    it looks like a ball .


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