Caption Monkey 2: Alligator Knocking

Posted by Alex in Animal, Caption Monkey on July 17, 2007 at 2:01 am


Image Credit: Richard Holinski / Island Packet

A 6-foot-long alligator climbs within inches of the doorbell after knocking into the front door of Roslyn and Robert Loretta’s home on Penny Creek Drive in Sun City Hilton Head on Friday night. The reptile apparently was enticed into the couple’s yard by the smell of teriyaki chicken. Link – via Falling Sky

All right – here’s where you come in: funniest caption wins a free monkey drawing by Ape Lad of Hobotopia!

Contest rule is simple: write your caption in the comment section (one caption per comment). Make it funny but please keep it civil. You can submit as many comments as you’d like.

Funniest caption will receive a free monkey drawing – you name the monkey, and Ape Lad will draw you one (for example: the Neatorama Monkey and the whole Monkey! set at Flickr). If you don’t win, but still want a monkey, you can buy one directly from him (it’s worth it!)

And congratulations to Jani who won last week’s Caption Monkey contest.

Update 7/31/07: Congratulations to L’elk #47 for submitting the winning comment!

Realizing their passive approach isn’t winning them many followers, the Jehovah’s witnesses switch to plan B.

Very Bizarro-esque!


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COMMENT

174 comments to "Caption Monkey 2: Alligator Knocking"

  1. L.T.
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:23 am

    I CAN HAS HOOMANBURGER?

    (LOLGATOR)

  2. w.f.
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:35 am

    peek-a-boo!

  3. Emily
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:42 am

    Good day folks, this is Alli Gator from the IRS. I'm here about your last tax return.

  4. iheartbeer
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:49 am

    If the house is a rockin', don't let the croc in?

    (aligator/crocodile, whatevah).

  5. rYan
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:50 am

    Bb-baby will you open the door?? Please?

    No I haven't been drinking!
    C'mon, it's me papa gator!!

  6. Andrew Zen
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:21 am

    Honey, can you please answer the door. I think your mother's here.

  7. Ryan
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:29 am

    WILMA!!!

  8. Lyndon
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:31 am

    "Captured on film a 'gator attempting to defy evolution and claim the title of the greatest predator known to man: The door-to-door salesman"

  9. Emily
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:48 am

    "Avon calling"

  10. David
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:49 am

    "LET ME IN! PLEASE! I WONT DO IT AGAIN, BUT FOR THE LOVE OF HUMANITY, PLEASE, LET ME BACK IN!"

  11. dave
    July 17th, 2007 at 4:02 am

    Bing-Bong, Candygram.

  12. gonz
    July 17th, 2007 at 4:05 am

    Candy-Gram, girl scout cookies, I swear I'm not a land shark.

  13. fine
    July 17th, 2007 at 4:06 am

    Knock Knock:
    -Who's there?
    -Chicken
    -Chicken who?
    -Chicken open, I'm going to come in.

  14. fine
    July 17th, 2007 at 4:27 am

    Knock Knock!
    Who's there?
    Ali
    Ali, who?
    Alittle Alligator who can't reach the doorbell!

  15. Kevin
    July 17th, 2007 at 4:57 am

    Hi, I'm your Mary Kay consultant with a great, new solution for dry skin!

  16. NM
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:03 am

    Hey hi...
    I found your dog down the street... What have you been feeding him with??
    He was delicious!

  17. nephster
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:15 am

    Roslyn was disturbed when her new "mobile luggage" finally arrived in the mail.

  18. john
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:36 am

    NO COLD-BLOODED CALLERS

  19. Aeris
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:44 am

    Look, I will dance here until you let me in - I got the move!

  20. murre
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:54 am

    The coolest garden sculpture ever - Now only $49.95!

  21. Milkman
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:55 am

    Dateline: To Catch a Predator: Predator Edition

  22. quinnn
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:16 am

    BRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAIIIINSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!

  23. Ursula
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:19 am

    "Good afternoon. No, wait! Don't be alarmed. It's true, I used to be like so many gators, spending my days hanging around in swamps, eating whatever poor creature came my way. But then I discovered the Church of Latter Day Saints, and turned my life around. Can I come in for a moment and talk to you about your relationship with the Lord? I can? Great.

    Now, about the Lord? Say hello to him for me, you fat, tasty idiot."

    (My favorite so far is the HOOMANBURGER one.)

  24. Ciarin
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:26 am

    When I grow up i wanna be a gheko!

  25. Teri
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:27 am

    "Come on, honey! I'm sorry, really! Don't be so cold-blooded!"

  26. Ciarin
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:27 am

    The smell of the neighbours cooking drove Ali up the wall!

  27. Miguel
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:31 am

    Im in ur doorway smellin ur teriyaki!

  28. the Asocial Ape
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:32 am

    'Candygram'

  29. Pypur
    July 17th, 2007 at 7:06 am

    I'm selling girl scout cookies. They're made with real girl scouts!

  30. Robert
    July 17th, 2007 at 7:12 am

    Aww come on... Let you dogs come out to play for just a little while...

  31. Dan
    July 17th, 2007 at 7:24 am

    "alright boys this is the house"
    and with that we never heard from paul hogan aka crocodile dundee again

  32. JMT
    July 17th, 2007 at 7:27 am

    Although delivery was prompt, Steve was not very happy with his "organic shoe" purchase from Zappos.

  33. sandy
    July 17th, 2007 at 7:29 am

    Ahh!! Lemme back in! I think I saw a dog!

  34. Jon
    July 17th, 2007 at 7:52 am

    "After years of suspicion Frank finally realized what the pet store sold him was in fact NOT an iguana."

  35. Xander
    July 17th, 2007 at 7:57 am

    DIVORCES ARE EXPENSIVE IN FLORIDA
    Honey, could you get the door?

  36. amanda
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:00 am

    Im in ur entryway humpin ur fine wood trim.

  37. AlexLandfair
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:01 am

    Paid for by the Colorado Department of Tourism.

  38. Jon
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:01 am

    At first he was embarrassed that he locked himself out of the house naked. . .but then he remembered he was an alligator and ate those smarmy bastards for laughing at him.

  39. Kevin
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:03 am

    Steve Irwin! Come out, come out wherever you are!

  40. Chris
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:08 am

    Landshark.

  41. matt
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:19 am

    wow, that hummingbird is clearly too large, green, scaly, and four-legged to reach that feeder.

  42. Sean
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:26 am

    News Flash! Alligator's learn to use doorbell! This also in, Florida's senior citizen population on the decline.

  43. felipe
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:40 am

    Oh yes! I tought him how to open the door! The bong thing he learned on his own!

  44. paul
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:44 am

    news flash, this picture is from Hilton Head, which is NOT in Florida. Where's Chris Hansen when you really need him?

  45. Dave
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:45 am

    Illegal alien vs predator

  46. tinyladders
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:47 am

    Guess Who's Coming for Dinner 2: Hidden Animal-Racisms

  47. l'elk!
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:53 am

    realizing their passive approach isn't winning them many followers, the jehovah's witnesses switch to plan B.

  48. l'elk!
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:58 am

    hmm, i think my comment was eaten by the spam filter...

  49. Matt
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:05 am

    Candy-gram!

  50. Matt
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:06 am

    I'm from the debt collection agency.

  51. kickinnc
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:08 am

    "Is possible make a shit your house immediately, very urgent, I have problem, please?"

    --From "Da Ali G Show: Guide to USA 2"

  52. Dave
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:10 am

    Little Pig, Little Pig, let me in! Or I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in!

  53. Chris
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:17 am

    Heeelllo? I'm lookin fo ma buckit!

  54. Ken
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:24 am

    *bing bong*

    You have nothing to fear -
    We're not carnivores, we're just doing Atkins.

    (shhhh! come on guys, stop giggling! they're buying it!)

  55. BelchSpeak
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:25 am

    Al Gator had heard about urban sprawl encroaching upon wetlands, but he had no idea it went so fast!

  56. t-rex
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:26 am

    Hello? Wanna buy some of my girl scout cookies?

  57. Skully
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:26 am

    Uhhh...Candygram!?

  58. Jeff
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:28 am

    Little Billy's Halloween costume was so convincing he spent the next 6 days finding his way home from the swamp!

  59. Rhea
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:42 am

    Excuse me, but have you any toilet paper?

  60. Simon
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:42 am

    This is er.. the Avon lady!

  61. Street Attack
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:53 am

    A little early for halloween isn't it?

  62. Kiera
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:59 am

    Oh Pleeaase let me in, Janice... I didn't know that was your cat, I swear!

    So, can I see you tomorrow?

  63. Rich
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:05 am

    Cow tools

  64. Jacki
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:07 am

    One day, Mrs. Alligator gets fed up with her husband not taking out the trash.

  65. Brian
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:11 am

    "Knock Knock" "who's there?" "Allie" "Allie who?" "Alligator"

  66. Amanda
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:17 am

    halp halp!! i locked meself out!
    i can has spare key?
    oh, btw, you has a flavor of peeple-bits

    ... kthanks bai!

  67. Some crazy dork
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:22 am

    As their new neighbors moved in, the resident Floridians sent over the 'Welcome Gator!'

  68. Some crazy dork
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:25 am

    "The alligator decided just come over, as opposed to crock-a-dailing the phone."

  69. Some crazy dork
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:30 am

    "Ok... this mail-order leather wallet says 'Some assembly required'. I wonder what that means?"

  70. Will
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:33 am

    Stacy? Stacy? Come on. Open the Door. Stacy? Damn it.

  71. Some crazy dork
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:37 am

    "Hello, customer service? I said 'Gator-Aid', not 'Gator-maid!!!' "

  72. Chris
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:42 am

    Honey I'm home!

  73. TubbyCat
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:43 am

    I CAN HAS HOUSE?!!?!?!

    (not copied from first post, I was thinking of that while on the front page.)

  74. Mike
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:49 am

    Can Timmy come out and play?

  75. Jake D.
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:02 am

    Oh, man. It's gonna be so funny when this guy comes out and trips over my tail.

  76. Chris
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:04 am

    Help! Louis Vuitton wants to make luggage outta me!

  77. Will
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:14 am

    Good day, madam, I'm a Godzilla's Witness, spreading the good news of His Scaliness. Do you mind if I step in for a bit?

  78. mario
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:18 am

    Thank you for calling the Lorettas, please leave your message after the tone... beep...
    Hello Mrs. Loretta, this is agent Smith from Sun City PD, I'm sorry we missed you at your home. We found the crocodile-skin purse you lost, and left it at your porch. Have a nice day.

  79. Joe
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:23 am

    Oh c'mon people...it's so obvious......
    Woman #1: [ moves to chain-locked door ] Who is it?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Mrs. Ramilarghh??

    Woman #1: Who is it?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Plumber..

    Woman #1: Plumber? I didn't ask for a plumber. Who is it?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Telegram.

    Woman #1: Oh. Telegram. Just a moment.

    [ unlocks door, and opens it. The head of the shark appears, grabbing her arm and pulling her into the hallway as she screams. ]

    [ SUPER: "Jaws II" ]

    [ dissolve to Sheriff's Office, Sheriff and Matt Hooper looking over a three-foot long metal tub covered with a white cloth ]

    Matt Hooper: [ looks under cloth and winces ] Oh, my God!

    Sheriff: What was it?

    Matt Hooper: Land shark. The cleverest species of them all.

    Sheriff:

    [ dissolve to Woman #2 in her apartment ]

    [ Music: "Jaws Theme ]

    [ a knock at the door ]

    Woman #2: [ appoaches the door ] Yes?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Mrs. Arlsbergerhh??

    Woman #2: Who?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Mrs. Johnannesburrrr??

    Woman #2: Who is it?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Flowers.

    Woman #2: Flowers? From whom?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Plumber, ma'am..

    Woman #2: I don't need a plumber. You're that clever shark, aren't you?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Candygram.

    Woman #2: Candygram, my foot! Get out of here before I call the proper authorities. You're the shark, and you know it.

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] I'm only a dolphin, ma'am..

    Woman #2: A dolphin? Well.. okay..

    [ she opens the door, as the shark pulls her screaming into the hallway ]

    [ dissolve to Sheriff's Office, Matt Hooper lifts up cloth napkin covering plate, then winces and looks away ]

    Sheriff: What is it?

    Matt Hooper: Egg salad again. [ removes sandwich from under napkin, and takes a bite ]

    [ dissolve to Woman #3 in her apartment, Woman #2 putting on make-up to go out ]

    [ door buzzes ]

    Woman #3: Who is it?

    Land Shark: [ muffled voice ] Land Shark.

    Woman #3: [ laughing ] Oh, Walter!

    [ she opens door laughing, but is attacked and dragged into the hall by the Land Shark ]

    [ dissolve to Sheriff's Office, Sheriff on phone looking horrified into another rtub covered with cloth ]

    Sheriff: [ on phone ] Hello, Walter. I have some good news, and I have some bad news. First, the good news. There's a party tonight at my house. Now, the bad news: you'll be coming stag. Goodbye, Walter..

    [ dissolve to Woman #4 in apartment, listening to the radio ]

    Radio: ...considered the cleverest of all sharks. Unlike the great white, which tends to inhabit the waters of harbors and recreational beach areas, the Land Shark may strike at any place, any time. It is capable of disguising its voice, and generally preys on young, single women. Experts at the University of Miami's Oceanographic Institute suggest that the best way to scare off the shark in the event of an attack is to hit or punch the predator in the Nose. Now for the weather..

    Woman #4: [ turns off radio, as the doorbell rings ] Who is it?

    Muffled Voice: Sorry to disturb you, ma'am. I'm from the Jehovah's Witnesses, and thought you might be interested in a copy of our journal, "The Watchtower".

    Woman #4: [ grabs a mallet and inches towards the door ] Why, I'd be very interested..

    Muffled Voice: Would you mind opening the door, ma'am?

    Woman #4: Certainly.

    [ she unlocks the door a crack, and reaches out with the mallet to strike the Land Shark's head. Instead of the shark, a Jehovah's Witness stumbles into the apartment and drops onto the floor in front of her. ]

  80. Joe
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:25 am

    @#$(*!...all these dam tract homes look the same.

  81. Joe
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:26 am

    Sorry to disturb you, ma'am. I'm from the Jehovah's Witnesses, and thought you might be interested in a copy of our journal, "The Watchtower".

  82. Andrew32
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:27 am

    "Honey, that Jehovah's Witness is back!"

  83. morandumdanu
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:27 am

    When Jehovah's Witness starts Recruiting alligators

  84. Anthony Ballesteros
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:27 am

    Mom...I think its those Jehovah's Witnesses again!

  85. Andrew32
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:29 am

    "Hello, I'm selling regurgitated girl scouts, ehrm, girl scout cookies... would you like to buy some?"

  86. tschup0
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:40 am

    Hey Jennifer, wanna buy a monkey?

  87. Miss Curly
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:48 am

    C'mon baby, just open the door. I promise not to eat the dog this time!

  88. MariV
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:52 am

    Wrong house? What do you mean this is the wrong house?

  89. agent0range
    July 17th, 2007 at 12:03 pm

    Shake to the left... Shake to the right.... let me in im ready to rock the house

  90. Tilly
    July 17th, 2007 at 12:20 pm

    I, for one, welcome our new alligator overlords.

  91. schmecky
    July 17th, 2007 at 12:26 pm

    honey, i just love the new doorstop. we haven't had any jehovah's witness' since we got it.

  92. Cobwebs
    July 17th, 2007 at 12:30 pm

    The delivery guy from Peking Moon made $137,000 in tips last month.

  93. logfleece
    July 17th, 2007 at 1:15 pm

    "Leave me alone!" screamed Hook in horror from behind the door

  94. neko
    July 17th, 2007 at 1:25 pm

    the Jeffersons got their poodle inside just in time.

  95. Chris Lester
    July 17th, 2007 at 1:53 pm

    "Homeland Security. Open the door, sir."

  96. Rosi
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:08 pm

    After another failed attempt to climb up the wall, Mr and Mrs Gecko realised it was time to tell their son he was adopted.

  97. Matty
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:14 pm

    The terrified Irwins huddled together in their home, as the gators came to finish the job the stingrays had started.

  98. Alasdair
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:19 pm

    Hi, this is Ali Gator from the Pest Removal agency. I understand that you have a plumber in your sewer?

  99. Nora
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:28 pm

    Scuttles the Supergator decided that stopping in time to avoid hitting houses always seemed to be his kryptonite.

  100. Tom K
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:33 pm

    Leesten, zeebah neighbah. Me no plan to hurt youuuu....

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pearls_Before_Swine_%28comic_strip%29#The _Fraternity_of_Crocodiles

  101. Lucia Ribeiro
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:39 pm

    Crocodile Mime hopes he makes some money at this place.

  102. will
    July 17th, 2007 at 2:43 pm

    NIAGRA Falls! Slowly I turned...step by step...and there you were...wearing my daddy on your feet!

  103. Kim
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:44 pm

    "You keep a'knockin' but you can't come in!"

  104. mark
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:44 pm

    But this IS later. Let me in!!

  105. brayden
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:48 pm

    I can has bipedal movement?

  106. Al -ligator
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:50 pm

    Flush *me* down the pan would ya? Well I'm back...

  107. Lera
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:51 pm

    Say NO to crock!

  108. Solo
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:54 pm

    Nancy! I think the cat is scratching the front door again, can you let him in?

  109. Solo
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:56 pm

    Their vision is based on movement. I'll stick to the wall and I won't move. I'm invisible.

  110. Denita TwoDragons
    July 17th, 2007 at 3:58 pm

    The midget Greeks soon realize that a Trojan Alligator wasn't a bright idea.

    --TwoDragons

  111. Bobbi
    July 17th, 2007 at 4:29 pm

    "Rossslynnn, the bird feeders are empty again."

  112. Julie
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:05 pm

    "Look, I'm sorry. Just open the door and I swear I won't try and eat the dog again."

  113. Mark
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:30 pm

    (Heard from inside the house): "THAT'S IT! I've had with those damn Mormons! I'm goin' out there and given 'em a piece of my mind!!"

  114. Chad
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:30 pm

    gator: "am I blending in? do I look like the wall yet?

    gators friends: "dude for the hundredth time there not gonna fall for it! YOUR AN ALLIGATOR NOT A CHAMELEON!"

  115. Mark
    July 17th, 2007 at 5:36 pm

    PS: If you've ever had Baptists, Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses come proletyzing at your doorstep then you'll understand my previous comment. I'm not picking on any one particular faith. I chose Mormons because, of the top three, I've had more of them come repeatedly knocking on my door.

  116. Ben Clyne
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:16 pm

    This isn't my house...

  117. Ben Clyne
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:17 pm

    Housekeeping. You want me eat your kids?

  118. Willo
    July 17th, 2007 at 6:59 pm

    Sam! Let me in! Your mother did it again!

    (Although I wish I had posed "Hello Zeeba Neighbor" first!)

  119. kort
    July 17th, 2007 at 7:06 pm

    Excuse me? Do you want to buy a wallet?

  120. Will
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:00 pm

    Can't...twist...knob....

    Need....opposable thumbs...

  121. Steve
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:12 pm

    "Henrietta! It's that damn dog or it's me ... you can't have us both!"

  122. Britt
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:35 pm

    "Andrew? Andrew?! ANDREW! Answer the door for your mother!"

  123. Aerek
    July 17th, 2007 at 8:51 pm

    This camouflage is terrible.

  124. Laura
    July 17th, 2007 at 9:28 pm

    It's a traaaaap!!

  125. Lionel Ash
    July 17th, 2007 at 10:19 pm

    Boogie dancin' too-nie-hie-height!

  126. Kat
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:02 pm

    At least its polite enough to ring the bell.

  127. scooter
    July 17th, 2007 at 11:54 pm

    open the door, man,it's me....dave!

  128. Ravi
    July 18th, 2007 at 12:31 am

    "Honey, what's your handbag doing on our doorstep?"

  129. Andrew32
    July 18th, 2007 at 12:44 am

    I think #21 should win...

  130. Jenna
    July 18th, 2007 at 1:13 am

    Uh, Hello? Anybody home? Uh, "ribbit"?

  131. gonz
    July 18th, 2007 at 3:48 am

    I'm looking for Sonny Crocket.

  132. gonz
    July 18th, 2007 at 3:50 am

    sure beats the old crap in a bag on fire prank

  133. Jen
    July 18th, 2007 at 3:53 am

    Maybe, if I push hard enough, I can get this vacation home OUTTA MY SWAMP!

  134. Nymo
    July 18th, 2007 at 4:08 am

    IM AT UR DOR
    DANCIN MA FEET OF

  135. Uniballer
    July 18th, 2007 at 8:21 am

    Honey; please let me in, I swear she meant nothing to me!

  136. Jennifer
    July 18th, 2007 at 8:29 am

    (from inside)...
    "Randall, I said, 'See you later, Alligator!' I know you understand that means, 'Go Away!'"

  137. e6c
    July 18th, 2007 at 9:18 am

    After years of declining pet population, one alligator takes the first step in getting back his easy prey...
    ...knocking on Bob Barker's door, and interviewing to take over The Price is Right!

  138. Dana
    July 18th, 2007 at 10:04 am

    "Damn! Why does she insist on putting the spare key on the jamb. Why can't she just use the mat like everyone else!"

  139. JIM
    July 18th, 2007 at 11:42 am

    "all your doorbell belong to us"

  140. Kenzie
    July 18th, 2007 at 11:53 am

    "Hello? Don't be afraid! I'll soon be a handbag anyway."

  141. Kenzie
    July 18th, 2007 at 11:55 am

    Who says two legged alligators aren't real?

  142. Sareh Amber
    July 18th, 2007 at 11:57 am

    This should keep those Jehovah's Witnesses out

  143. Kenzie
    July 18th, 2007 at 11:58 am

    Over in Florida, you have to be careful to who you open the door to on Halloween.

  144. Kenzie
    July 18th, 2007 at 12:05 pm

    "Fine! If you don't open the door, I'll open it myself!"
    (Few minutes later)
    "Alohomora! Open Sesame! Ábrase! Openway Upway! (etc.)"

  145. e6c
    July 18th, 2007 at 12:21 pm

    Officials at the Pentagon have raised the TERROR THREAT LEVEL TO: RED due to attacks by the new terrorist group Al-Igator.

  146. Teaboy
    July 18th, 2007 at 2:00 pm

    Police warned residents not to allow the gator into their homes without asking ro see its ID.

  147. e6c
    July 18th, 2007 at 3:03 pm

    Alligators are so dumb, you light the bag on fire, then you ring the doorbell... and that is why, an alligator will never be president!

  148. I Am Legend
    July 18th, 2007 at 3:41 pm

    ...As the mail man walked away, Dan realized that the "Alligator Boots Home Kit" he'd gotten at eBay was a little more involved than he was led to believe.

  149. I Am Legend
    July 18th, 2007 at 3:46 pm

    Oswald was sure his idea for a door-to-door petting zoo would take off, if people would just come out of their houses.

  150. I Am Legend
    July 18th, 2007 at 3:49 pm

    "Open the door! Come on! Look, I promise this won't turn out like that Siegfried and Roy thing!"

  151. I Am Legend
    July 18th, 2007 at 3:53 pm

    "Oh, my God!!! Please, open the door!!! There's a rabid squirrel out here!!! HELP!!!!"

  152. gonz
    July 18th, 2007 at 6:01 pm

    Paris Hilton thought the new gator disguise would throw off the paparazzi.

  153. JDub
    July 18th, 2007 at 7:53 pm

    Candy-Gram!!!

  154. Andrew
    July 18th, 2007 at 11:18 pm

    Nobody's home ... wonder if there is a key under the mat?

  155. Lenny
    July 20th, 2007 at 10:17 am

    Forget huffing and puffing, I'm just going to push your house down!

  156. Lenny
    July 20th, 2007 at 10:31 am

    Hello, is Steve Irwin home?

  157. Lenny
    July 20th, 2007 at 10:32 am

    I once caught a fish thiiiiiiiiis big!

  158. Lenny
    July 20th, 2007 at 10:36 am

    The new Nanny 911

  159. Deb
    July 20th, 2007 at 7:06 pm

    "Hey, anthropomorphizers. I ate your freakin lolcats. And I'll eat you and any other ugly gerbil, hamster squirrel or child you tag with that stupid 'can have ur an idiot' crap. Do we have an understanding?"

  160. jody busch
    July 20th, 2007 at 10:57 pm

    candygram!

  161. fine
    July 21st, 2007 at 8:28 am

    I promise - I'll be polite

  162. kaytlyn
    July 21st, 2007 at 12:59 pm

    "honey?"
    "yes dear?"
    "your mother's at the door."

  163. Kat
    July 21st, 2007 at 9:45 pm

    "You give me chicken, me love you long time..."

  164. Jen
    July 22nd, 2007 at 11:36 pm

    While enamored with the powerful jaws and quick body disposal, the CIA re-thought expanding their Alligator Assassin unit outside of South America...

  165. Drew
    July 23rd, 2007 at 1:39 pm

    Candy Gram

  166. Aerek
    July 23rd, 2007 at 3:20 pm

    Reason #42 not to have door glass shaped like a vagina.

  167. Chad
    July 24th, 2007 at 12:30 am

    6 days and still no winner?

  168. PaperCat
    July 24th, 2007 at 8:46 am

    No! I don't want to buy your skin!

  169. Mel
    July 24th, 2007 at 10:10 pm

    "Then i'll huff!, and i'll puff!, and i'll BLOW!! your house in!!!!!"

  170. Mike Darnell
    July 27th, 2007 at 12:43 pm

    "Publisher's Clearing House...you may be our next millionaire winner!"

  171. Rasmus
    July 31st, 2007 at 8:47 am

    Ouch! Jesus chrisjjst, that lasjjt tequila wassj a bit over the top...

  172. Manderine
    August 14th, 2007 at 2:07 am

    Honey! Don't open the door... remember what happened last time we let a long, hard croc come inside.

  173. JEFF BAILIN
    October 12th, 2007 at 10:36 pm

    crock a door salesman

  174. jammy
    April 4th, 2009 at 3:55 pm

    please dont kick me out honey, can i atleast have my crocodile dundee dvd collection back?


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